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I've never been Chronicled before. |
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** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** It's my Chronicles!!  |
I gotta start thinking that maybe I've been studying waaay too much, when I'm sitting on my bed and I see a pink balloon fly in through the front door, and immediately yell out, "KITTY!!!" (I yelled that out, not the balloon...) It's round, it's bright pink, and it's flying through the air... Not a kitty, Steph, NOT a kitty. |
My reach is global My tower secure My cause is noble My power is pure I can hand out a million vaccinations Or let 'em all die in exasperation Have 'em all healed of their lacerations Have 'em all killed by assassination I can make anybody go to prison Just because I don't like 'em and I can do anything with no permission I have it all under my command Handlebars, by the Flobots Generally, I have no respect for rap music of any kind. And, when this song first came out, I was like "OH GOD, NOT A-N-O-T-H-E-R ONE!" ~BUT~ this particular rap song is not about wearing as little clothes as possible, or some guy singing about what he'd like to do to all those almost naked girls that just happen to be jam-packed into some club he's at. For a rap song, I actually think that this is quality stuff. What really CHILLS me is the progression from something so innocent and childish at the beginning like "I can ride my bike with no handlebars, no handlebars" to the content nearer the end of the song like "I can lead a nation with a microphone.... I can split the atom of a molecule... I can guide a missile by satellite... I can end the planet in a holocaust" and so on. Even the song itself gets sort of freaky, as it gradually builds up from spoken sentences to yelled. I can't help but think about all these politicians, dead or alive, that must have started out as innocent little kids riding bikes, later on making the decisions to go out and kill a nation, or to ignore ones that are dying out on their own, starving or killing each other. And to think that ANY little kid out there right now riding his bike could be in the future lineup of men (or women) like this. Freaks me out big time. I'm actually doing a presentation for one of my Linguistics papers tomorrow on Language and Politics, and I was sorta annoyed that this song does not quite fit my needs as an example for my presentation over other examples I have found to use, but still, I am using this quote in the very end slide just as a closing thought. Hopefully it will be effective. If you get the chance, take a look at the YouTube vid to hear the words (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuK2A1ZqoWs) - although I do warn that the vid is sorta boring the first time you see/hear it - or read the lyrics to the full song here: http://www.lyricsmania.com/lyrics/flobots_the_lyrics_24339/other_lyrics_54916/ha... |
| The things that crack me up about Guitar Hero: - the f***ing awesome sound it makes when you miss a note - the absence of strings (aren't they pretty much the whole POINT of a guitar?!) - the little plastic bit you flick up and down in order to 'strum' - the way you don't actually ever have to move your hands - how freakin' dizzy you get after spending HOURS of watching a line of notes fly towards you - seriously, the walls and floor look like waves in a pond afterwards - hearing the non-stop *click click click* of someone playing in another room - the way that people who are good at Guitar Hero think they can actually play the guitar - how much playing bass gets dissed (people just don't want to have to play bass if you're playing together with someone else, lol!) - people's who playlist on their laptop comprises solely of songs found on Guitar Hero - people (my ex, lol!) who will show you in the middle of the street how they played a song on Guitar Hero, with sound effects - people who can't stay awake in class cause theyt've been up trying to beat their high scores on Guitar Hero - people who have to sit there for half an hour waiting to actually HAVE a turn cause those in control can't decide which version of Guitar Hero they want to play - the way people will look after their Guitar Hero guitars better than they would a real guitar Oh the list goes on, Guitar Hero is pretty funny. Actually quite a fun game to play though  |
Friskies, the cat food brand, have just put out Friskies Party Mix. Does anyone else see how WEIRD that is??!! |
Hello people. Being a budding linguist and all (lol), I have a point of interest discovered in one of my linguistics classes recently. It is what I am now calling the Epic Tale of Can Vs. Can't. So apparently, for American's, the vowel sound in both 'can' and 'can't' is the same. But for us 'New Zilnders' - they are two different vowel sounds. Can - 'can' - and can't - 'cAHn't'. NOBODY here would ever say 'can't' - it's 'caHn't'. So why don't we have the same vowel sound? CAN and CAN'T, or CAHN and CAHN'T. Odd, huh? Are there any Americans out there who say it like we do? Or are we the only one that have screwed up cans and can'ts? What about anyone else who is not American. How do you guys say it? |
Emoticon use is the number one leading factor in the Europa Frost's Perceptive Analysis On What My WDC Friends Are Really Like debut non-fiction volume of intelligent reasoning. And here is just a sneak preview of what can be found in this amazing fountain of perceptive knowledge: If you scored mostly A's, then you're most like the Anonymous Test Case Number One: ⭐Princette♥PengthuluWrites  . You use a variety of emoticons on a daily basis to really express yourself, and your comments are just so cute because of it. Unfortunately, you are the most screwed up of all, because this suggests a personality disfunction as you identify with the extremes of emotion in short timeframes which essentially confuses your body and soul into schizophrenia. Seek medical attention immediately.If you scored mostly B's, then you are most like Anonymous Test Case Number 4: Steev the Friction Wizurd  . You use a small variety of clown-like emoticons framed within various degrees of laughter. Not only that, but you frequently try to make up your own emoticons that leave innocent bystanders slightly confused and often with a lack of words. If you're not careful, you're going to end up watching small children at night through locked bedroom windows, and hiding in people's closets for fun. Seek medical attention immediately. If you scored mostly C's, then you are most like Anonymous Test Cases Two, Five, and Six: TSC , The Unknown King , and GrimReaper-WDC Angel Army . You don't use emoticons. Instead, you prefer to yell big yells, shout big shouts, weild every weapon known to mankind and MORE, and ultimately destory the world and everyone in it over and over again in the space of 50 words or so. You never tire of it. You never give up. You never back down.You're fine. This is healthy these days. If you scored mostly D's, then you are most like Anonymous Test Case Number Three: spinsky. You don't use emoticons either, or very rarely. And you don't really need to. You're pretty good at expressing yourself without them, and people find you naturally funny. You're going to go places and do big things in life, all with a fairly graceful air about you. Unfortunately, you're 89% prone to get drunk at a huge public speech, say something racist and get shot (we call this assassination), thanks to your Tall Poppy feelings finally getting to your head. Seek medical attention immediately. For a limited time only, the whole analysis can be yours in only three easy payments of 9,999 GPS! BUY NOW and you'll also recieve another title from Frost valued at 3GPS! ORDER NOW! You can't afford to miss out on this one-time deal where you'll receive Europa Frost's Perceptive Analysis On What My WDC Friends Are Really Like !!!AND!!! Europa Frost's Stupid Event of the Day Advent Calendar - A Biography valued at 3GPS, but yours totally FREE!!! Disclaimer: I do not think that any of my friends actually have psychological issues. |
I would like to tell you an epic tale about how my secondary school, which we shall call WGC, invented what I am henceforth referring to as THE most efficient way to drown 60 schoolkids all at once. It's flawless. WGC has 6 houses. And as per the long standing tradition, those houses compete year round at events such as House Stage Challenge (dance production), House Athletics and House Swimming Sports, to name a few. Whoever it is that keeps deciding each year to keep The Crocodile Race in the House Swimming Sports competition needs to be shot. Have ANY of those teachers EVER tried to do that race? Basically, ten kids from each house link hands and have to swim as one giant human chain from the shallow end of the pool to the deep end of the pool, and back to the shallow end of the pool again. First human chain back to the shallow end wins the points for their house - but you CANNOT LET GO OF HANDS. It's a hilarious race to watch. It's not so fun to be a part of. But someone's gotta do it. You've got six lanes of 10 kids holding hands in the deep end of the pool. No one can use their hands to help them stay afloat because they're all linked, and no one can reach the bottom. You can't move at your own pace - you have to go with the pace of the human chain. What do you THINK is gonna happen????? I'll tell you what happens. You have each of those 10 people, in the deep end, pulling down on the people either side of them that they're linked to, trying to keep themselves afloat. It's the pure human survival instinct at it's most desperate. It's pure carnage. Heads go under. Spluttering (and even in some cases, some sort of screaming/cries for help) takes place. Really, I ask. HOW can this abomination CONTINUE to take place each year?? I swear the teachers were still laughing back in my 7th form year when I fished some poor little girl from my house out of the pool after the race - she was lying on the side of the pool all blue with a glazed over expression!! And for a couple of years now I've thought it was weird that I used to love swimming, and now I absolutely HATE water. I think I have the answer... and it's no wonder it didn't come to me sooner - It was blocked from my mind for good reason!! Thankyou, WGC, for yet another traumatising memory |
| My Favourite Things At The Moment - The Yod Squad (my Linguistics gang at uni - that's what we call ourselves) - Enchiladas - Microsoft Paint - Animal Biscuits - Rollerblades - Body Attack - Linguistics Jokes and Slogans *"We ain't no Yod Droppers, PIECE" *"Can I have a Mountain Jew?" - Colours (in hair, clothes, makeup, anything) - Alphabet Fridge Magnets - Symphonic Metal - Spanish - Stargate Atlantis - Unexpected high-fives Things That Really Upset Me - Pak 'N' Save (Just the building. Not the people) - Black things with 5+ legs - Sqaushed kittens - Cold tap in the bathroom left DRIPPING - Spelling mistakes - A word I don't know the meaning of - Keys getting stuck in my pocket when I really need to pee |
| WDC has truely affected my real life in New Zealand in many ways. I've made some great and inspiringly awesome friends here who have had quite a spiritual influence and a staggering effect on who I am as a person today. With their kind words and encouragement I have become a totally new person - my old self wouldn't even recognise me now!! For example - I'm getting worse grades. I had a 200-Level Spanish assignment due in on the same day that I was really really eager to visit the In and Outs and smack Steev the Friction Wizurd in the back of the head. I wanted to have a little balance between work and play, so I missed out a page of my assignment. Turns out that lowered my grade by 25%. Now I have to do that much better in the final exam. I'm doomed.I've found some similar souls to mine who share the same passions as I do and encourage me to pursue what I enjoy on WDC. One night, as I was having a laugh at spinsky being drunk in the In and Outs, paired with a couple of funny IMs, I decided I'd join him and I started in on the vodka shots. It was kinda unfortunate, cause I'd forgotten that I had a very early class the next morning which I turned up to only just able to walk, only to find that I was going to be holding a camera all day long and expected to do a GOOD JOB of the filming. "There's too much noise coming through - why are we using an omnidirectional mic?" I proclaimed. Turns out I was the only one who could hear all that extra noise. It's great when you get to share in all the happiness of your fellow writers on WDC. ⭐Princette♥PengthuluWrites just recently let us all know that she's gotten engaged to her boyfriend. Great, huh? It really put things into perspective for me and made me feel all good inside about how special it is when you find that amazing someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with, and who wants to spend the rest of their life with you  . So, I got drunk, sent out many "I've always had feelings for you, why don't you love me?" texts then woke up the mext morning and realised there's a few guys now who probably won't want to hang out with me ever again.It's funny how other people's small "habits" and mannerisms on WDC can rub off onto you in real life. The last time I went back home, I got into a bit of a tiff with my family about doing the housework. "Yeah well you know what?" I screamed at them. "All my minions have heard my cry and when they come you'll ALL be cut open and burning coals will be placed inside your intestines and you'll ALL be tortured except for you Sam cause you're too young to do as much stuff around here but ANYWAY then when you're all almost dead they'll reverse the process and start again expect this time they'll do it slower and you'll all have to live through the pain a million times and THEN-" "Ok, ok! FINE. I'll do the dishes," sister said. Afterwards I was sure I'd heard something similar in one of the In and Outs. Maybe it was something dday5000 said. Or GrimReaper-WDC Angel Army maybe, or even TSC .I have WDC to thank for all this access to people from all corners of the world who have really filled up my life. I would not be ME without YOU - thankyou WDC |
Today I'm just posting a link. This makes me laugh so much. Everyone should have something they can rely on to make them laugh. I'm just kinda curious I guess to see if any of these sound funny to people who were not invloved in the actual context of it all... let me know if you have a squizzie!! I just added some new ones into it as well
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| Life Back Home I went back home for TWO WHOLE DAYS. It was pretty good. Well ok... -Got really sick so couldn't catch up with mates I'd promised to catch up with. -It rained and it poured. -Dad's awesome "gypsie" truck broke down when we were shifting my couch back to my flat. Rung roadside rescue, got towed to the nearest town, was told the truck would never start again, had to abandon it AND my couch at the mechanic's in Bulls. Didn't think I'd ever see my couch again cause it would have been much more expensive to hire a truck or trailer to get it the rest of the way than it would have been to just buy another couch here in Palmy. I was so gutted. BUT THEN the next morning a big school bus (Dad's) woke me up at 620 (the flat) and my couch jumped out of the back and ran up to me and gave me a big hug! Well that's how I remember it happening, anyway Good To Be Back (Some Things Never Change) It was good to be back home and see that some things never change. The massive arguments between my sisters over the littlest things that seem so pointless to me now. Mum doing her routine checks of who has left their shoes untidily outside the front door. One of my cats (Lily) who INSISTS on sleeping in the bathtub every night. If somone is having a bath she will sit there and look over the edge every few minutes to see if it is STILL being occupied Will I Still Have a HOME? It's sad to think that the next time I go home I probably won't be going HOME. Mum and Dad are having quite a big change of profession soon, which means they need to move out of our family home. I've been shown around where they are moving to, and I'm really pleased for them and their business ventures and think it's a really really nice place that will make them happy. I really appreciate that they wanted me to see this new place and know what's going on - they were really keen to know what I thought of what they were planning to do and where they were going. It's just weird though - for them and my two younger sisters it will BECOME their home. They'll all be living there and make new memories and be familiar with everything there and the life there. But for me... I won't have that. So when I go home it'll be like somewhere that's not really MINE if you get what I mean. But that's cool. I'm a big girl now. I've been living away from home for a year and a half now and doing fine It'll just be a bit sad, that's all. Just kind of makes me feel a bit more alone living up here away from it all and not having that place to go back to anymore.LIFE GOES ON I TELL YOU |
| Ok, this should be interesting. Had a massively drunken and fun night out last night with lots of mates cause it was our last day of exams so we were all officially FREEEEEEE!!! Don't know how I always manage to get my room so trashed before I leave though. Here's what I can see that shouldn't be where it is, from where I'm sitting right now. Empty alcohol boxes = 13 (ok not so bad cause I'm saving them for my robot costume) Empty bottles on floor or desk or drawers = 12 (ok HATE to think where the rest of them are, lol) Drawers hanging open = 5 Shoes strewn across the floor = 17 (Uh-oh... gonna have to look for the missing one) Bags filled with random rubbish = 3 Towels with no home = 3 Road signs = 1 Items of clothing strewn everywhere = 32 Coathangers with nothing on them = 4 Things that have fallen off the wall = 2 Remains of food that hasn't been 100% eaten = block of chocolate melted in my bed, a McDonald's box of chips which made my WHOLE ROOM smell like them, a plate with random crumbs on it, a lion's head from my box of animal biscuits.. Other odd items lying around = 1 rollerblade, someone's umbrella (not mine!), bottles of hair dye that have decided to turn into mini volcanoes and spew lava everywhere, a glass full of water and all the orange lollies that I hate (I like to drown them until they are squishy membranes) Man... I'm gonna have to clean it all up at some stage. And that's only the stuff that shouldn't be there. All the stuff that SHOULD be there is messed up even worse. I had to fight a washing rack to get in the door this morning - HOW did it even get BEHIND the door in the first place???  |
Yesterday as part of my new bid to be a more active person, I gave birth to my Anti-Lazy Chart. It's stuck up on the wall in the lounge at my flat, and it says in big letters STEPH'S ANTI-LAZY CHART. The deal is that everytime I do something specifically Anti-Lazy, I get a point on my chart, and when I get up to 100 points I get to go shopping for a new piece of clothing I told my flatmates that now when they want something they have to ask me to go and get it for them, as part of the new plan. So K had me go get her a drink from the kitchen and get her laptop cord from her room - stuff like that. It wasn't till H got home and found out about my Anti-Lazy Chart that I realised I'd pretty much dug my own grave. "Steph, clean up the lounge" H said. My heart sank. The lounge was strewn with a sea of alcohol bottles, boxes, newpaper etc etc and none of us wanted to clean it up. But, because I'm so stubborn and don't like to get beaten in such "mind games", we shall call it, I did it I have a total of four points now I'm well on my way |
| I've kind of gotten to a point in my life where I've actively started making changes, physically and mentally, to get me out of my constant "worrying about everything" state that I've been in for the last few years, and start making myself happier and healthier. That being said... I find it funny that it's the simplest things I get the most enjoyment out of. I'm like a little kid! I'm always getting in trouble with the flatties cause I have a bubbleblower that I keep in the lounge so whenever we're in there watching tv there's just a constant stream of bubble floating around the room Yesterday was the best day ever. First I baked some peanut butter cookies (which by some miracle turned out alright), then I went for a pointless wander into town and got the BEST sundae EVER. Then I went and got brochures and other information to plan a holiday I want to go on in the second half of this year with the flatties. I'm hoping to head to Rotorua, where I'll get to go in the Zorb YUS! How cool is that gonna be? Apparently there have been cases where people go in doubles in the Zorb, and someone pukes so then they roll in that person's puke all the way down I'd STILL enjoy it if that happened to me!THEN - the best part of the day - I spent $1.50 on a box of JUMBO CHALK and spent the afternoon out in the sun with the flatmates drawing on the concrete. I drew all of us (I was a green alien floating upsidedown, H had a shitty look on her face cause everyone thinks she always looks grumpy or bored, E had massive boxing gloves on cause she's the TOUGH girl in our flat, K had a halo cause she's a Christian and 4 love hearts cause she's got 4 boyfriends)... and I drew some massive sheep with the boys names in them outside their flat, cause they're AG boys at uni, lol!) And I drew E running us all over with her car, and I drew a map of the universe.... and then we drew a big hopscotch and played that. I didn't win but I had the most gangsta hopscotch moves ever  TODAY I went on a rollerblade mish but I just didn't have "it" this time round. I went down a massive hill (which I knew was going to be a mistake but I still did it anyway)... yeah... the MONSTERBLADES don't have breaks on them and the only way you can stop when going down that hill before flying out onto the road where you'll likely get hit by a car is to fall or crash into something. So I absolutely CANED into a big blue fence a little way up some random persons driveway and OMG it really hurt! I got up pretty fast and then just stood there all on my lonesome and laughed. A maori girl on her bike saw me do it and on her way past she asked me if I was ok, LOL!! Hope nobody was looking out the window at that moment though - cause I literally just came out of nowhere and was like KABOOM and the whole fence and garden shook, and sounded like something smashed, LOL! Even though my whole right side is now really sore - it was just too funny to not give credit to! Here comes a few more additions to the Bruise Pool GOOD TIMES |
| OK so seeing as I've been living here since the end of January this year, just A BIT has happened up until this point. Here's the jumbled and possibly nonsensical update: Me and H moved in two weeks before K and E, so we spent a couple of nights alone here as cavemen cause we literally had no food, no money, no credit on our cellphones, no fridge, no washing machine, and NO ELECTRICITY. We had candles and muesli bars, one set of keys, a beanbag chair in the lounge and two bottles of fizzy drink. That was pretty much it. K and E moved in the next week, and I think it was only one or two nights after they moved in that we had the Case Of The Mysteriously Locking Door. E somehow got locked in her room one night. She couldn't unlock it from the inside, and with the key passed under the door me and K couldn't unlock it from the outside. Two hours later, after much laughing and filming from me, some praying aloud to God from K, and a few entries and exits into E's room through her outside window, we came to the conclusion that her window was now her new door, and that'd be how she was going to get to class in the morning. Anyway, that morning E woke up and just simply unlocked the door. LOL. We still don't get it. We discovered the tradition of The Rubbish Bush. Now this is pretty amazing. There's a MASSIVE tall and fat bush out the front of the flat against the front fence, that is absolutely full of strange rubbish. There's an entire sea of empty beer bottles on the ground layer, and in the bush there is: a shower radio, a windscreen wiper, a printer, some sort of dangly wind thind, and a huge bright yellow chair, just to name the biggest articles. We've found out from the previous occupiers of the flat (who have moved only a few metres to the flat behind ours) that a lot of that has been there since way before they lived there, and that it is kind of our mission to add to the tradition Later on came the 620 Flat Warming. Fun night of dancing and mixing between H, E, K and my friends. Great night, apart from someone ripping wallpaper off the walls.... and apart from someone stealing our lightbulbs RIGHT OUT OF THE LIGHTS... I kinda ended up ditching my own flat warming for quite some time and was over at the neighbours' for most of the night drinking and watching movies... then went back home to find that everyone had LEFT... doors wide open, windows open, crap EVERYWHERE. So then it was back to being relatively good and responsible students for a while - studying hard and only ditching a FEW classes. Then came the random, "for no reason at all" Flat Party. The most remembered thing about that night by everyone who attended was "Where the hell did that guy Patrick come from??!!!" LOL. He didn't seem to belong to anyone (even though we eventually sussed out he belongs to H's younger sister), and he was hovering around me very scarily all night. One part of it he was trying to prove his worth as some sort of Kung Fu master, insisting that he could kick the tops of our doorframes and the lightbulb in the light. I swear if he hadn't been drinking his aim would have been just slightly more to the right and we'd have a lot of shattered lightbulbs. But what a sight - walk into the kitchen to find a small group of people gathered around some drunk guy trying his best to karate kick the light that's way up over everyone's heads. Somehow he managed to follow H, K, me and my crew for the night of M, H and C into town and was just creepily THERE the whole time we were dancing. But C managed to find him two girls then we took off, lol! The memories of "that guy Patrick". Sigh. Somewhere in amongst those events H and myself begun what has now become our tradition of the Kitchen Dance Party. The four of us each have a set night a week we have to cook dinner for the flat. Now, every time it is my turn or H's turn the two of us shut up the kitchen and have a two person mean cool techno dance party while tea is cooking and we're doing the dishes etc. EXTEMELY AWESOME and REVOLUTIONARY dance moves havee been born on a regular basis as a result. And it's a fun way to get a bit of fitness going on We've also started up what I hope will become another tradition, which goes by the name of the Flat Skate Mish. The first time we went out was the funniest. H took out my rollerblades, I took out E's MONSTER rollerblades which have no means of stopping and I SWEAR they roll by themselves when you're just standing still - and E took out her skateboard. We skated around the neighbourhood together for about an hour but it was hilarious cause H wasn't ROLLING, she was WALKING like a giant penguin, LOL!! Too funny. It took me about 10 mins or so to get used to the feel of E's MONSTERBLADES (they ride so differently to mine, way harder to handle), and it was during that 10 mintues that I tried to avoid a car pulling into the petrol station by skating out onto the road infront of about 10 more cars Idiot.Ok... well that's the main points. But a lot has happened. - The night of strange fireworks that were just coming from NOWHERE - The very kind person deciding that every letterbox in our block needed a lovely mince pie squished inside it - SOMEONE totally trashed my room one night, like seriously tipped EVERYTHING upside down, and we didn't even hear them do it even though we were ALL in the room right next door watching a movie. Nothing at all was stolen from my room (although alcohol was stolen from the kitchen), only my room was targeted (yet it is the furtherest one away from the door they came in) and we have no idea who did it. We suspected the boys behind us but they really did have no clue about it, so maybe it was one of their friends who thought that they still lived in THIS flat and was targeting one of them, not one of us? Nooo idea. Many more strange times abound in The 620 Life |
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