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 |  I've maxed out. Closed this blog. |
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This is a way of making myself write something coherent and grammatically correct almost every day. I'm opinionated and need an outlet. I'm also prone to flights of fancy. Thanks for stopping by. |
| Only a few weeks until the official season of winter is upon us. The shorter hours of daylight make people depressed. Christmas Eve is known as the biggest day for suicides, not because people are lonely or missing their old traditions, but because the lack of light feeds their problems. The longer nights augment their sadness until they can't bear it. Yes, shorter daylight hours make sad and troubled people suicidal. If you know someone who may be feeling low, recovering from cancer or going through the grieving process, make sure they get their time in the sunlight.Open the window shades earlier in the day. Encourage them to go on the sun porch or to sit by the window in the morning. These little things may lessen the burden they bear, or improve the attitude enough to help the healing process. You may not be suicidal, but you might get uptight from time to time or feel a little sad without reason. Just take a break during the day to step outside. Whether you're at home, in a big office building, or on a factory line. Get into or out into the real daylight several times a day. It may make a big difference in the way that you feel or get along with others. Put as much light in your day as possible in December and January. It could pay off. |
| Today I did my exercise! But I canceled it out when someone offered me an eggnog this evening. Oh, well. It had a bite to it, too. The season is upon us. There is a tree up in my family room, and outdoor lights are sorted in my foyer. They'll go in the trees on both sides of the garage. We won't light anything for a while yet, but it takes a while to get ready. Someone else will climb to the top of the ladder for us. My dad is 86, and we don't let him get on ladders or drive after dark. I will have to drive him for his shopping excursions. I will climb into the attic to get the decorations down some time this week. He wants the same traditions he has had since he got married at age 23. I've got to order the neighborhood luminaries. It's a neighborhood tradition to put them out Christmas Eve about 5 pm. It's the one time of year I see some neighbors that I never see the rest of the year. Lots of trees and shrubs separate us all. My parents have only lived here for about 17 years, but it's been going on for about 30 years. We like the way it looks, and drive around with Christmas music in the car just to look at these gently rolling hills and winding roads decorated with sandbags and candles. Since my mother passed away, and I moved back to town, I accompany him for a drive around. I hope that anyone who reads this will have a happy season preparing for Christmas and New Years. The occasion itself, whether a pageant or concert or meal or Santa's visit, is all over in a flash. We are reminded it's not the destination, but the journey. The process of getting ready, of observing traditions, of shopping, of wrapping, of charity are the journey. Let it be full of peace and happiness in all the mundane duties. |
| Well, I finished 50,000 words plus for NaNoWriMo, but I still don't have the ending. It's in sight, I'm working on the climax, and then have to tie things up. But I made the word count. I'm too close to quit now. I still managed to clean house today, wash some clothes, put away the holiday dishes, and fit a lot of writing in. I didn't wrap presents which was one of my goals along with exercising and doing Christmas cards. But there's always tomorrow. If I ever met all my goals, what would I have to go on for? I'm happy I didn't go shopping. I still have money in the bank. I always found when I went Christmas shopping, I bought more things for myself. I'm not one of those women who gets a thrill hanging out at the mall, or shopping for bargains, or trying on clothes. So by staying home, I got to keep my money and my sanity. I did my writing and cleaning, and I'm happy. Isn't it glorious to have a day after, to recover from the holiday, from stressing or sleep deprivation or family or whatever, and to start on the plans to do it all again the next holiday? Life goes on, and we need more days after, to rest, to come back to our senses, to change the pace, to do nothing and not feel guilty about it. I promise I will exercise tomorrow! |
| We all survived the day. I managed on four hours sleep. But we had a huge meal, everyone was full. The children were happy and entertained us all. Now all the guests are gone, I took my nap during Jeopardy (anywhere from 5 to 15 minutes is a frequent happening, even when it's not a holiday). The pots and pans are washed and the floors are swept. I've opted to empty the dish washer tomorrow, so I can surf the web tonight and write. A very satisfying day nevertheless. The worst incident of the day is when the two year old fell out of the chair and bloodied his nose. Then the six year old was left unsupervised too long, and she hid the key to the backdoor, and taped up the doorknob very tightly, along with some drawer handles and the sides of the cabinets. She was gone when we discovered this. We finally found the key covered up in the kitchen, and I broke all my nails trying to scrape tape off everything. We missed a few traditions. No one had coffee with a slice of pumpkin pie. We just started too late in the day.We never had a sip of spiked eggnog. It's something just one of my brothers, my dad, and I do. We aren't real drinkers. We didn't even have wine with dinner this year. We're Southern ice tea drinkers. And a bottle of "spike" actually lasts us from year to year. But it's just that one little thing we do together. I sort of missed it, but he had a long drive home with a baby in the car. When my mom was alive, the same brother and Mom and I would sing Christmas songs together in harmony on Thanksgiving, after all the eating. The other two brothers and dad would just listen or ignore us. And, of course, none of us cook like Mom did. I only have one uncle left, and he can't drive that far any more. Lots of things change. We miss the ones who've shared our Thanksgiving in the past, most particularly, my younger brother who passed in 2012. He never got to meet our little nephew, and he only met one of the 3 great nieces. He was smart, generous and kind, and a good cook. He controlled the TV set, could speak loudly, and usually would disagree pointedly with someone during the day. But we loved him, and he loved us, and his absence was felt strongly today. Holidays always bring up memories.They are one of the things for which we are grateful. We are so blessed to have had such wonderful people in our lives, to have had traditions with them, and to remember them when they are gone.We are all the richer because they have been a part of our lives. |
| By the time my company shows up Thursday, we will have shrimp ready for cocktail sauce, a roast turkey breast, a large ham, dressing, gravy, green beans, mashed sweet potatoes, cranberry relish, pumpkin pies, a pecan pie, hot rolls and butter, store bought dip and chips, homemade cheese spread and fancy crackers, salad, and iced tea. And juice boxes for the kids. The good dishes (I didn't say china) will be out with the best stainless steel. The house will be dusted, mopped, polished, and books lined up neatly. The toilets will sparkle and beds free for napping (my brother with cancer, and the babies need naps). I will be exhausted, but if I slip off to take a nap, I'm being rude. My father, who can go to sleep sitting up in the doctor's office or in church, will have no trouble going to sleep in the living room full of people. The little kids will run around and giggle and imitate his sleeping sounds, even the toddlers. I will work until six again tomorrow, and get home, supposedly in snow, to prepare the night's meal, and do the turkey and ham, set the table for breakfast, and get the vegetables ready to cook Thursday morning. The turkey cooks during the wee hours. Dad wants oyster stew for breakfast, so he'll have his fancy breakfast ahead of his big meal. We'll have a stiff drink of eggnog at the end of the day. Maybe if it's stiff enough, I can go to sleep immediately after. The day after will be like a hangover day. Rest, let your stomach recuperate, take antacids, and if you can move by afternoon, go get some exercise. I dream of having the next day to do Christmas cards and start wrapping presents, but it never works that way. So Friday is not shopping like when I was younger, and my mother did all this preparation. I used to shop and then go to work! Now I have off, but I'm still crashing from giving them the Thanksgiving they want. I want it, too. I just want someone else to do it!! |
| My two nieces, although sisters, were very different from each other. The younger one was shy and stand-offish. I see her the most now, because she lives nearby, and has two children of her own. She wants them to spend time with their grandfather and great-grandfather who can be found together frequently where I live. She was adorable as a child, and is a beautiful young woman. Her older sister was outgoing, affectionate, and a show-off. I have very fond memories of spending time with her before I moved out of town, and became somewhat disconnected.When I lived away, we saw each other on holidays and special occasions, but it was never quite the same. She, too, is a lovely young woman with a baby, but lives about 6 hours or more away. When she was an only child, I spent a lot of time with her. I remember making cookies with her. She was wearing patent leather shoes, white socks, a white blouse, pink sweater, and a pink and lavender plaid wool skirt. She was so intent on her cookies. I let her stand in the kitchen chair while she cut her cookie shape. She lost her footing and fell forward onto the table getting flour all over her pretty clothes and face. I expected her to cry. But no, she got upright with a little help, and went on shaping her cookie and placing on the pan. I cooked them no matter what they looked like. There have been hard times in my life, and all I had to do was remember making cookies with her, and a smile would come to my face, and life didn't seem so terrible. Another time, I came home for a weekend visit and went by their house in town. They were in the yard. When my 3 year old niece saw me (by then she had a baby sister), she ran over to the chain link fence calling my name. I reached over the fence, and she leaped into my arms. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world. I will treasure moments like these forever. Time spent with a child is never wasted. The memories grow more valuable with time. |
| I repeat myself frequently, but important things are worth repeating. An attitude of gratitude is a good survival tool. It keeps us on the right track, and out of the whining crybaby path. It keeps us moving towards success and improvement. All of us can find things for which to be grateful, even if we have to take a magnifying glass to look at our lives. Chuck Swindoll states that we can't control our circumstances all the time, or the things that other people say or do; we can't control natural disasters or even all our health issues. What we can control is our attitude. We choose to stay calm or to freak out. We choose to be positive or to be bitter. We choose to be joyful or to feel sad. By practicing thanksgiving regularly, we can be our own best friend. We have to flee from the "poor poor pitiful me" syndrome.Want to boost yourself up, get back on the creative track? Count your blessings. Want to improve your relationships, thank people for what they do. Thank the bus driver. Thank the waitress. Thank your housekeeper, your employees, your fellow associates, your spouse. Thank someone in the military. Thank the receptionist who always gives you good service. Having trouble listing things? Be thankful you can read, that you know how to use the Internet, be thankful someone invented electricity. Be thankful that the rain makes things grow. Be thankful when you get a good night's sleep. Don't spend time looking in the magnifying glass thinking about how your flawless skin has changed; instead, be thankful you woke up this morning, and that you can still see. The possibilities are endless. |
| Anyone who has read my blog before or one of my articles knows I love reruns of The Virginian. They're not reruns to me, because I just discovered them a year ago. I'm still seeing episodes for the first time. I've learned to appreciate a whole new group of actors and have become acquainted with other shows and movies they have done. I've also seen familiar actors in very different roles, like Dick Sargeant, which increased my appreciation for their skills. One of the reasons is that it's a 90 minute drama that allows the writers to develop the character more. I'm surprised at the large number of followers the show has, and how devoted they are to the stars. At least I have a lot of company. One of those actors I admire so much is Clu Gulager who recently had a birthday. Today I saw him in a guest role as a bad guy, a few years before he was a regular on the show. It took two shots before I recognized him. The first brief camera shot the voice over was about an outlaw, and I thought, "Well at least this bad guy is cute". The second shot, I did a double take. His face was puffier than usual. He usually looked skinny at that age. His face was made up with scars around one eye. His hair was dark brown, unkempt, and curly. His character and his kin were the scourge of the town. Maybe I've seen him in too many roles, but I even sympathized with him as a bad guy. His teeth are just too nice to be a criminal. But he was believable. Yet when his terrible character was shot and killed, I cringed. I wanted to see him act some more, but it was over, at least for "Jake Carew". I love his voice the most, and I wouldn't be hearing any more of it for that show. OK, I'm obsessed with Clu, James Drury, Gary Clarke, Don Quine,and the others. Their images are frozen on the screen forever. And those of us who like the show will go on watching and adoring them as long as we are able. I can't get enough of them. |
| I just heard a great line in a romantic comedy that's gotten me excited. "You don't want to be an extra in the movie of your own life." Wow, isn't that the truth? Yet, I'm sure a lot of us don't get to be the stars a lot of the time. Overbearing parents, partners or bosses take the center stage, and we just put in our time. I know when I was married I never got to be the star of my life; I was the second banana until I got out. That's probably easy for a lot of people to relate to. High school kids let a friend dictate their actions, even other friendships. Sometimes in work situations, or with sick family members, we have to play the extras, maybe for extended periods of time. But it shouldn't be all day, every day, year after year. I like the thought and I'm going to post it on my desk. I'm going to remind myself of it often. I don't want to be the understudy, or the extra, or the prop girl, in the movie of my own life. |
| There is an old ice breaker question: If you had a choice, would you want more time or more money? There are so many ways to look at this. There many self-important people who would say time is money for them. Sales people, wheelers and dealers, real estate moguls (I know I'm being redundant) who want to charge the doctor if he's held up with an emergency patient, because during the time they waited at the doctor's office they could have closed a deal or made a thousand dollars or whatever. Time is money for doctors and especially for lawyers and accountants who charged by the quarter hour. Some people get bored with too much time on their hands, but would love to see if money could keep them entertained. To others their dreams are tied up in big projects that require a lot of money. Obviously, a lot of people want more money. Then there are busy people who don't have enough hours in the day. They aren't rested because they have kids, and elderly parents, or sick relatives, demanding jobs, household chores, and personal errands. They need more time for exercising or more free hours for writing and still take care of self and family. And some of us see that life is short, we want more time added onto our lives, not our days. We want more time to accomplish those dreams, to love those people, to do all our stuff. We want to think our lives count and live to see the evidence! Me? I want it all. If I had enough money, I could pay someone else to run my errands, clean my house, cook my meals, take care of my father, so that I could go all the places I want and pursue my dreams. If I have a longer life, I want the health and freedom to live it fully. I've lived on very little money and know I can survive. If I lived in absolute poverty with everyone around me doing the same, I'd probably opt for money. I've lived on hardly any sleep, and run myself ragged, and was unhappy, but I got through it. I do want to live as long as possible and still have some quality to that life. So I think I'd place the highest value on time. |
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