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 |  Finally! Some answers! |
| [Introduction] ROUND ONE The basic idea is that a group of animals are sitting around a fire discussing how the zebra got his stripes. Each writer is an animal (but don't choose to be a zebra). Their ideas are far-fetched or reasonable, as you like. ROUND TWO You have TWO choices. Either... 1. Suggest a question to be answered in the third round. (If you like someone else's question you can repeat it.) ..........OR.......... 2. Just say (or email me) that you are ready to leave the campfire. We will skip to the next person's turn after 24 hours of waiting. GREAT FIRST ROUND! I enjoyed reading all those answers. Hope everybody had fun with it and will continue. We also have new invitees pending, so the fire might grow even bigger.  ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Click here for Round ThreeROUND THREE How did the skunk get its stink? ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Click here for Round FourROUND FOUR What prayer is the Praying Mantis praying? MAKE IT RHYME IF YOU CAN! ROUND FIVE Click here for Round FiveA Tale of Two Different Animals ROUND SIX Click here for Round SixA Picture of An Animal ROUND SEVEN Click here for Round SevenIt was a dark and stormy night... ROUND EIGHT Click here for Round EightSomething about a zoo... ROUND NINE Click here for Round NineGood-bye! |
| NAME: Topsy SPECIES: Turtle POSTURE (optional): The old turtle puts another marshmallow on a stick and holds it over the fire. He begins to speak... How did the zebra get it's stripes? It happened a long time ago, near the beginning of everything. You see, at first the zebra didn't have any stripes. Instead, it had a big bulls eye design on its side, like a target. Of course, this was before man appeared so he didn't have to worry about human hunters. But one day the unexpected happened. Extraterrestrial hunters visited earth! The alien hunters tried to shoot deer and antelope, but the aliens were terrible shots (bad eyesight in the strange light of earth's sun) and the deer and antelope were brown and hard to see. Then the aliens discovered the zebras with the big targets on their sides. Now they fired their guns and hardly ever missed. The zebras were being slaughtered, butchered, and fast frozen for the freezers of the alien spaceships. (The aliens had killed off all the game on their home planet centuries before.) One of the last remaining zebras ran to Mother Nature for help. This was so long ago that Mother Nature was still alive at that time. "Help us, Mother Nature! This crazy design on our sides attracts alien bullets like our dung attracts flies!" Mother Nature waved her magic wand and the targets on the side of the zebras melted like children's crayons left in daddy's car on an August afternoon. Soon the zebras were decorated in long stripes of melted target. The aliens left. Some say it was because by then their freezers were overflowing with zebra meat. But the zebras know. It was the stripes. |
| Name: Sam Species: Wolf No, Aliens weren't involved in the creation of the Zebra. No, you see, the animals wanted a race, but needed a way to to mark the Start and Finish. So, the got a pair of horses, one with black fur, and one with white fur. Problem is, one of the contestants, a cheetah, ran so fast, half the fur came off of each horse, and ended up on the other. Some generations later, they became racing stripes. |
| Name: Samantha Species: Red Wolf Posture: Stares at the rest of the circle in sadness and disbelief. "Did neither of you take biology? All right, I can see where you both got confused, but come on! Ahem! What really happened was that in the beginning, the Creator Aliens -the Creatalians- made countless species that were black, and countless species that were white. But they ended up oppressing each other... No one knows why.... And started fighting amongst themselves. Eventually, disturbed by all the noise, the Creatalains tried to force them all to hug and make-up. Literally. But they forced them together too hard, and all the animals fused with their counterparts! Squick! But the white and black parts still didn't want to associate, so the new animals ended up a combination of both colour and shade, instead of being completely grey. So you see, the modern zebra is just the result of the Creatalian's accident and attempts at solving a conflict. It also explains why zebras are so moody today -multiple personality disorder. So, do you two understand it now?" (Eye rolls all around the circle) |
Name: Unknown Species: Panda Posture: Chewing on a bamboo stick, hat pulled down real low. Puts an exasperated paw against his forhead. It's really quite simple if you think about it. An albino impregnated a donkey while the elf watched to later tell the dwarf that stripes were symbolic of good and evil combining in a perfectly neutral.... Wait no that's how to make a bamboo pie. Mhmm... Wait, what was I saying? I dunno... (slowly drifts asleep...) |
| Name: Sheena Species: Tiger Posture: Stretched out in front of the fire licking her paws. No, no, you're all wrong! The first zebra was a white pony, that lived near the beach. One day while he was walking in the surf, he found a pretty glass bottle in the sand. When he picked it up, the top came off and in a puff of smoke out came a genie. "You freed me, so you get a wish." "Wow, like really, like that is so cool. Umm.. like.. I want to be like a tiger, dude." The white pony said. The genie being very literal worked his magic and the pony now stood there covered in black stripes. "Dude I'm not a tiger! he yelled. "You said you wanted to be like a tiger, not a tiger, so now you are. You should really learn to speak more clearly." |
| Name: Caesar Species: Chimpanzee Posture:Hanging by his feet from a branch eating a banana "It wasn't a White Pony who got black stripes." Said the Chimp "It was a black horse who got white stripes, there was this black horse who walked behind a picket fence..Then this painter came along and painted the fence white...And that's how the Zebra got his stripes...Honest." |
| Name: Peter Species: Songbird Posture: Flitting from spot to spot around the campfire. The songbird puffs up his colorful plumage and pipes up in his high voice. "None of that is right! But some of you got some of it… "In the beginning, there were only two zebras: a white male and a black female. And they hated each other! They'd always make fun of the other for the way they looked, saying 'ooh, looks like you rolled around in the mud! Or 'go lie in the sun, you ghost!' …and so on. They made a terrible racket, so much that we birds couldn't hear ourselves sing! "So we decided to do something about it, and decided if they looked the same, they wouldn't fight. So half of the birds got white paint for the black zebra, and black paint for the white zebra. They didn't see it coming! Dozens of birds flew at them, painting stripes over their entire bodies with their wings. It turned out that zebras were ticklish, they were rolling around laughing their heads off! The birds striped up their entire bodies. "All that laughing must have cured them of their bad moods. From then on, the two zebras were nice to each other, and we birds could hear ourselves sing. Eventually, they even fell in love! All the zebras today are their children, and its why they are all half white and half black. And that's how the zebra got its stripes." |
| Name: Alicia Species: Mamba snake Position: Curled on a rock next to the fire to keep warm "Idiots." She hissed as she lifted her head to look at everyone. "All of those sound so far-fetched. Aliens? A ultimate creator? Paint? Really now...at least the songbirds story sounds logical. If you really wanted to know how the zebra got their stripes, you should have come to me in the first place instead." She cleared her throat so everyone could hear her clearly. "It was many years ago before any of us were here. The zebra was originally multi-colored. They sported at least 3 to 5 colors, each one of them unique in their patterns and style. However, this also posed a problem if one of them went missing since it was hard to describe what that zebra looked like. They had to find a better way to define themselves and still be a little bit unique. Well, one of the zebras was a painter of sorts. He loves to do original art...black and white, although she was known for using other colors as well." She smiled as she continued. "One day, the zebra used another zebra as a canvas, painting them with stripes of black and red, then black and blue, and white and green. So many combinations until they finally settled on black and white. The zebra felt she looks marvelous and requested the paint be made permanent and so the zebra painter did so. The trend eventually caught on and the zebra painter, over the course of years, painted all the zebras black and white, which small variations on the stripes as to keep individuality." Alicia curled back on the rock, staring into the fire. "That, my dear friends, is how the Zebra came to be striped." |
| Name: Susie Species: Elephant Position: has just entered the group carrying another log for the fire; drops the log on and fans the flame with her ears before taking a seat next to Panda. Sorry, Tiger, didn't see you there. You have a bit of fire on your tail...there you go, you got it. (helps beat Tiger with her trunk) You're all wrong with your information. Zebras weren't painted and there are no aliens...it was so far before your time (Susie pulled a cig from behind one of her ears and lit up) --It was during the great wars. Those were terrible times, the world was in such turmoil. Everybody was taking sides all because the word was that a great flood was coming. Some said there was petition going around to save the world and a giant boat was built; some guy named, Floyd, or Norton or something like that. We were all worried. Tickets were sold out and it looked like we were just going to end. There was a lot of pushing, shoving and line jumping trying to get on that ship. It was the great war after all. The Zebras couldn't take it anymore, you know how gentle they are, always wanting to pass the peace pipe and all that. That's when Norton yelled down from the deck of his great ship that only two of each of us could go, and we had better decide it ourselves or he would. It was apparent that someone needed to be in charge and a quick election was held. There was a big black Zebra and a lovely white Zebra chosen to organize the proceedings. They were standing close, with their heads wrapped around each other's necks deferring over the situation when the storm started. Lightening bolts fired down from the sky striking them. The force melted some of the black Zebra onto the white Zebra and back again until there were stripped with each others best qualities. They became the officials that night for the biggest competition ever held on earth. And that's why officials wear black and white stripped shirts even today...in honor of those who came before. (Susie winked at Caesar) True Story. |
| Name: Foghorn Species: Chicken (Leghorn) Posture: Struts in, humming  lump dum do di do do doh, DOO DAH, DOO DAH Howdy campers! Gimmie five! ... hmm ... four? ... umm ... three? ... uh ... no offense intended, Miss Alicia. When Steve - nice boy but about as sharp as a bowling ball - I say when Steve asked me if I liked Kipling I had to tell him I didn't know cuz I've never been kipled. Been hornswoggled coupla times though. Didn't like that much.But however, gals and guys I've been perusing I say perusing your stories about how the zebra got his stripes. Just ain't so. These here stories remind me of Paul Revere's ride, a little light in the belfry. Your explanations well exceed the limits of my medications so I scratched around and dug up the true facts. Way I say waaaay back in time even before the advent of the tv remote (when our ancestors had to crawl across the Paleolithic floor of their caves to change channels) the First Mover was relaxing in her office having created each of the animal species and given them their various tasks. There was a knock on the door and a visitor entered looking as nervous and fidgety as a bubble dancer with a slow leak. The First Mover smiled kindly. "And what are you called, then?" The visitor's face reddened. "I ... I'm still a whatchamacallit." "For Gawd's sake!" the First Mover yelled. "You mean to tell me Adam still hasn't finished giving names to all the species! That Man has to learn to leave Eve alone, quit horsing around, and get on with his job! Tell him from me." Horsing??? thought the visitor but said nervously, "I think Adam thinks not leaving Eve alone is his job. But I'm here on another matter." "Do tell!" "Well, you know how you gave our kind of whatchamacallits the task of practicing pulling stuff so that we'd be ready when Adam got around to inventing stuff for us to pull? We've been practicing hard but there's one type of whatchamacallit who is always late and often doesn't turn up for the drills at all." "Your type of whatchamacallit? He looks like you?" The visitor tossed his glossy brown mane in a supercel ... a supercil ... a high-and-mighty manner. "Vague resemblance I 'spose. But he has a dirty-white coat". "So he's a whatchamacallit of a different colour? Right! Tell this whatchamacallit I want to see him in my office first thing tomorrow morning" the First Mover ordered. "And tell Adam to get his finger out." she added pointedly. But no whatchamacallit appeared in the office the following morning. It was well into the afternoon before a zebra (Adam had got his finger out) arrived. "At last. I hear you have been ducking out of practice drills. Explain yourself." scowled the First Mover. Ducking??? thought the zebra but replied, "I just don't see the point of getting out of bed for these drills. The rate Adam is going it will be millennia before he invents anything that needs pulling." "That's no excuse for your laziness and dereliction of duty. You need to be taught a lesson. I sentence your type of whatchama - you got a name yet, by the way?" "Zebra." "Excellent! I hereby sentence zebras to forever forfeit the honour of pulling ploughs and wagons and stagecoaches and hansom cabs and coal carts and gun carriages and canal boats and and and ...any other stuff that needs to be pulled. And as a permanent reminder of your disgrace I forbid you to ever remove those stupid striped panamas you are still wearing even though it is four o'clock in the afternoon." "Suits me." said the zebra under his breath. And the rest I say the rest, as they say, is history. |
| Name: Noah Species: Moose Posture: Sitting up against a tree, legs outstretched before him. He smiles as the stories grow more and more absurd. Noah clears his throat as he eyes the growing crowd. His dark eyes soften and he reveals a toothy grin. "I do enjoy the wild imagination that all of you possess. My family actually knows the secret of the zebra and their stripes. It really is quite simple. It all starts with my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great... Oh never mind." |
| Name: Esmeralda Species: Ladybird Posture: flies in erratically, hovers above a large leaf and lands. The assembled animals jump with amazement when a stentorian boom emits from this tiny creature. "Don't be so ridiculous!" Her clipped vowels cut through the ensuing hubbub, as the mob gaze up at Esmeralda. "I have never heard such arrant nonsense in all my life!" The tiny ladybird folds her shiny, red black-spotted wings and settles herself more comfortable before continuing. "It really is quite simple." Her tentacles quiver with indignation. "In actual fact, the zebra wanted to be red with black spots, but the lazy animal over slept on the morning that they were being given out, and I beat him to it." She utters a snort of derision as she preens and stretches her wings out in the sunlight. "By the time he arrived, all the other patterns had be chosen, so he had to make do with his black and white stripes." Esmeralda sniffs pointedly. "Serves the lazy beast right, if you ask me!" She yawns, then falls asleep, snoring. |
| GREAT FIRST ROUND! I enjoyed reading all those answers. Hope everybody had fun with it and will continue. We also have new invitees pending, so the fire might grow even bigger. ROUND ONE The idea was that a group of animals were sitting around a fire discussing how the zebra got his stripes. Each writer was an animal. Their ideas ranged from reasonable (sort of) to far-fetched (drug-addled). ROUND TWO You have TWO choices. Either... 1. Suggest a question to be answered in the third round. (If you like someone else's question you can repeat it.) ..........OR.......... 2. Just say (or email me) that you are ready to leave the campfire. We will skip to the next person's turn after 24 hours of waiting. You can remain the animal you are or change or even become human. *gasp* |
| Name: Unknown Species: Panda Posture: Stretching and yawning after waking up. Scratches his immense belly. Looks around, slowly formulating a thought. "I done forgot, what was going on and I just have one question. Is the zebra white with black stripes or black with white?" |
| Alicia sighed at hearing even more gossip and decided to change the subject. "Which one of us would make the best human childs toy and why?" |
| Peter hopped onto the shoulder of the red wolf as he looked at the faces looking around the campfire. "Both good questions, I suppose," he said thoughtfully. "Although considering the last one went, I'm not sure we'll get any conclusive answers. Still, we can either keep talking about zebras, answer a whole new kind of question about how we'd make good toys, or answer something completely different. I'm quite capable of answering any question!" The songbird preened, fluffing up his plumage at the boast. |
| Name: Susie Species: Elephant Position: Trunk raised in a loud trumpet for attention-- "That's enough--Leghorn Foghorn is hogging all the smores! That's the problem with these intellectual discussions, there's always someone hogging the smores and I'm sick of it. Please pass the marshmallows...I don't know why we are arguing over these silly Zebras anyway. I told you the true story of how they got their stripes and whether they are black with white stripes or white with black stripes is merely a point of view that has nothing to do with the basic truth. All this talk about aliens and paint and running into each other blending into the creatures they are now is simple a diversion---let me ask you this...if aliens were involved with making Zebras stripped why stripes? Why not squares or triangles or circles---huh? Answer me that." Susie squished marshmallows between the graham crackers and sat down on a log with a loud, Hmmmph-- "answer that one" |
| Caesar thought to himself about all the Questions that had been asked thus far. He wanted to think up a good question that would stump everyone. "I got a question." Caesar said "Where do Skunks get they're stink? |
| lump dum do di do do doh, DOO DAH, DOO DAH Sheeesh, Miss Susie that was twenty, I say twenty years ago! You never forget, do ya? If we try kipling (as in rearranging the letters of the original title just so) How the zebra got his stripes becomes How the zebra resists hot pig - a wrong but wromantic story? or How the zebra pisses hot grit - a wildlife documentary? Look, I'm just trying to be helpful! Sheeesh! |
| Esmeralda snorts with derision! "Trust you to lower the tone, Foghorn!" She wrinkles her nose in distaste at his toilet humour. "I prefer a much more intellectual discussion" She turns to glare at Foghorn but losses her footing on the leaf and falls headlong towards the ground, remembering just in time that she can fly and hurriedly opening her wings. Her dignity in tatters, she returns to her perch on the leaf with the laughter of her companions ringing in her ears. |
| Sheena begins licking her singed tail. "My, you elephants are so clumsy, but I guess you really can't help it being so big and all. I would like to know one thing though, do elephants really never forget? I mean really, no one can remember everything!" |
| "That's a good question," Said Samantha. "But I really don't think it answers the fundamental mystery of all life and creation: Do fish know that they're wet?" |
| Name: Susie Species: Elephant Position: smacks her forehead with her trunk--  Now that's a good question!!! I know a skunk; very good friend of mine, by the way, and they are so misunderstood and under loved. It is really unfair what happened to the skunk. Did you know that skunks can run faster than turtles? They also have very long eyelashes. The friend I was telling you about is from France; a true romantic, a lover, a gentleman and a bit of a scholar. Skunks come by their stink quite naturally. It began with their fear of water and soap. The very first skunk was born he was dropped into a basin of water to clean him up (right after his butt was slapped) that traumatized him into a fear of water. You get your butt slapped and then dipped into water--it was a nightmare. Every Saturday night was bath night but not for the skunk...he would run and hide; which added to his BO. After centuries of avoiding a bath, well...he became very pungent and repulsive to other animals. I, on the other hand, find skunks to be quite exciting and good company on long trips (keeps the hunters at bay). True story. |
| Name: Caesar Species: Chimpanzee Position: Eating a Banana Caesar said "I heard a story from an old Coyote Shaman that Skunks were onions who were transformed into Animals, in fact in Coyote Language Skunk and Onion are the same word...Basically there was a Coyote who wanted a Wife so Mama Nature struck a bolt of lightning at a nearby Onion to make him a Wife...The Animal was Black with White Stripes...The He-Coyote thought the new creature was just a Short and Fat She Coyote...Then more Coyote Men wanted more wives like their Brother so Mama Nature converted more Onions into Skunks until the Coyote Village was full of such stink everyone's eyes watered...And the Skunks left to go they're own way." |
| Name: Foghorn Species: Chicken (Leghorn) Position: Dozing in armchair, mumbling to himself “No no Miss Susie ... GERROFF ... behave I say behave yourself ... unhand me ... GERROFF ... I don’t care if you’ve just read Fifty Shades Of Grey ... GERROFF ... four I say four times a night is enough for any ... GERROFF ... have you no shame? ... what would your mother think ... GERROFF ...” Falls from armchair and wakes up. Looks around to locate Omniscient Point of View. Fails. Reads email. “How did the skunk get its stink? Well, by a curious I say curious coincidence of contrived continuity, I happen to know.” said Foghorn, addressing the room since he knew Omniscient Point of View was in play. “A certain skunk was a good friend of mine. Poor chap was driven demented by sex-crazed chickens. He was irresistible to them. A cross I say a cross I have had to bear myself. He tried everything to put them off. Treated them in an arrogant egotistical manner. Didn’t work. (read too much Mills & Boon). Claimed he was dysfunctional due to troubled childhood. Didn’t work (read too much Mills & Boon) As is the way of the world, having tried all other options he resorted to common scents. A chemist made up various perfumes which he tried and reported success with one. Not surprised, said the chemist, hens can’t help acting on Repulse” |
| Esmerald turns her languid gaze on the elephant and flashes her a smile. "Well Susie dear, you're half right." Susie smiles back tentatively at the uncharacteristic friendliness of Esmeralda. "He does have unsavoury personal hygiene issues. However, this is not helped by his fondness for legumes and brassicas." Susie's brow furrows with incomprehension. "Let me explain, my dear." Esmeralda is again her condescending self. "The skunk delights in eating all kinds of cabbages. Brussels sprouts are a particular favourite. And he simply adores baked beans." "Aahh!" Susie smiles broadly. The others nod knowingly. "We all know the effect that can have." The animals snigger and titter, nudging each other. "Exactly!" Esmeralda glances round the giggling group. "Copiuos, noxious gases mixed with chronic BO!" Her nose wrinkles in distaste. "Eugh!" |
| Sam the wolf looked at the rest. "Guys, it's quite simple - the first skunks were dropped on a New Jersey landfill - thus why they stink so bad." |
| Name: Samantha Species: Red Wolf Oh, not this again... Thought Samantha, stretching like a dog. "I'm telling you guys, it was aliens! They created the skunks as biological weapons to fight a massive war! At the end of it, there were few casualties, but everybody who survived smelled so terribly that they all avoided each other and fled to the far reaches of space to escape the stench. And they left the skunks behind here to serve as a weapons depot, in case they ever needed to come back and fight again. So, in a nutshell, skunks are just really weird aliens." |
| Peter hopped onto Samantha's back, his plumage ruffling. "Aliens! No no no, what madness! But you are right about one thing, it is a deliberate weapon. "A long time ago, there was a lady skunk that was the most beautiful creature in the animal kingdom. But because of that, no one would leave her alone. Beavers, foxes, crows, you name it! "So she took matters into her own hands. Well, paws, and devised a smell so horrid all those suitors would leave her be. But it was made in such a way that skunks alone can stand it. Because she was so beautiful, her and her children became the parents of all skunks today. She they may not have her beauty, they all still want to be left to themaelves. "That's how it happened." The bird told the crowd confidently. |
| One day a skunk got curious about the various jobs that those two-legged creatures called humans do. He was especially curious about those that worked in FACTORIES, particularly int he PERFUME industry. He sneaked in, disguised as a smell expert, and went about with his magnifying glass, sniffing at stuff, pretending he knew what he was doing. The factory foreman was so impressed he asked the disguised skunk to mix a formula for the greatest perfume ever. The skunk didn't know how to say 'no', so he said 'cabbages' instead, and they handed him a test tube and some liquids. He finished making his creation and then, clumsy skunk, he spilled it all down himself. That's how the skunk got his stink. |
| Name: Señora Maloliente Species: Mephitis Mephitis Posture: Stamping a bit... I thought y'all were my friends! This is not a question normally raised in polite company. I can tell you this: my momma told me it was a gift - an amazingly potent gift. All of you have odors but you have no control over them. We, on the other hand, are blessed with the ability to create a powerfully malodorous liquid, store it in a small sac and disperse it as an aerosol at will. I say "malodorous" but is it? I like the smell. I love the fact it lingers for a very long time. I love the fact that if I spray it on y'all, you will carry MY scent for several days. Even the area in which I release MY scent will tell the tale for days... Posture Change:Stamping becomes almost frantic... Speaking of tail... Posture Change: Tail raises and is turned toward the group... A gift... Not a question to be asked in polite company... |
| Name: Sheena Species: Tiger Posture: Rising to flee! "No Senora, don't do it! It's not like this discussion was personal. Just calm down, yes, that's it, relax." Senora Maloliente lowered her tail slightly, looked at them all for a moment, then all of the sudden the air was filled with noxious fumes. "Well, now the question isn't how the skunks got their stink, but how do we get rid of it? Any suggestions?" |
| Name: Susie Species: Elephant Position: Returns to the fire circle with more wood and drops the pile closely to where Esmeralda; AKA Ladybird was flitting around. "You are a nervous little creature aren't you?" Susie said, then flipped her tu-tu at the bird. She took a sit on an abandoned recliner. "By the way, Essie--thanks for explaining the skunk  business but I still think I'm right; I will give you that they do eat way too much of the gas producing produce...but enough of that. The new question is: What prayer is the Praying Mantis praying? I'm glad this came to me first this time before all the alien  stories come out confusing the issue, because as I've said before--been there, know that. It was a thousand years ago, picture it---a small village and a beautiful young elephant is out for a summer stroll. It was hot that day. Sweat was running between the folds of my knees and I was searching for a swimming hole to cool off in when I came across a Mantis sitting on a leaf. Hey there, little fella, what's ya doing? Shush, can't you see I'm praying? Oh, sorry, I didn't realize.....what's ya praying for? Right now, for you to go away. I knew he was only teasing me--- Ha! Good one. Now, seriously what's ya praying for? He looked right at me and said, What? You like everybody else? Think we Mantis aren't spiritual? Think we don't have problems? Think we aren't aware of our surroundings and immortal souls? Whoa, little fella, didn't mean to insult ya. (Truth be told, I did think they didn't have much going on in their little brains but I guess I was wrong.) Well, if you must know, and obviously you do--I'm praying for more crickets and spiders to be born so I'll have more food tomorrow; and for Elephants like you to stop stepping on us. I admit, I quickly checked my feet to see if there were any squashed bugs between the toes and then --sensing that he was a bit disagreeable, I left. Now, whenever I sit down I check my toes to make sure I'm stepping lightly. So far no bugs, but I did find a few slow moving pigmies twice last week. True Story |
Species: Chicken (Leghorn) Posture: Surrounded by crumpled balls of paper. There is an almost empty bottle of The Famous Grouse at his side and a triumphant smile on his face. "Still I say still got it! The best yet, by far." "Let us prey." said the green praying mantis "Send all manna of bugs where this plant is Or at least a fat few While I play the statue Else I'm forced to dine there - where my aunt is." |
| Species: Ladybird Name: Esmeralda Position: Sitting at a tiny desk scratching with a minute quill on a sheet of vellum. "I think you will find that this explains exactly what a praying mantis prays for!" Esmeralda waves the vellum back and forth a few times to dry the ink and then begins to read out the following words. A dining praying mantis once said "I must pray that this prey will be dead, for a prey that is living isn't willingly giving." And with that she just bit off its head. |
| Name: Sheena Species: Tiger Posture: Changing the bandage on her scorched tail, and reciting her favorite poem: Miss Mantis sits consumed in prayer absorbed in her meditative state. But what is it she is praying for? She's praying for a mate. You see she lost her last one he was a strapping, handsome lad he satisfied her all her appetites and was the best meal she'd ever had. |
Here's the deal, as I tell you I can't cook, and that is true. My friends have been trying To teach me baking and frying But I persist in my recalcitrant attitude And just won't learn, dude. One day there was a mantis, praying at my gate I said, "Hey look, he wants a better fate" My friend said, "No, he wants something to eat He's praying you learn to cook, nice and neat!" |
Name: Hoo Hoo Species: Northern Pygmy Owl Posture: Sitting on a branch... What's that I hear? A mantis in fear? "I pray please don't prey... ...on me!" Posture change: Northern Pygmy Owl Eating A Praying Mantis   |
| Samantha the red wolf felt compelled to put forward her own highly unique hypothesis. "The aliens came down, with thunder and fear To take with fire, what the beast of Earth all held most dear. The mantis were paralyzed- they shivered with fright Babbling, 'My, god' as plasma jazzed in the night. They clasped pincers for succour, gazing all about True they suffered PTSD, but for the aliens, it was a rout. All the same, the bugs have not been the same since And even the thought of a 'Saucer still yet makes them wince." |
| Peter the songbird's eyes became lidded, and he swayed as he said in a soft, sing-song tone: So subservient, the tiny little monster pleads to Gods for prey. |
| Name: Susie Species: Elephant Position: (Embarrassed she didn't write a poem for the last round--I forgot!?!) Okay, so I forgot to write a poem; sometimes elephants forget---sometimes. Just like sometimes turtles run fast, and fish crawl instead of swim, and, and... The Ant and the Gecko a tale of two different animals The Ant is struggling to drag a crumb of bread when he stops to wipe his forehead he sees a gecko watching. "Hey, can you help?" "Sure. What kind of insurance do you have?" "What?" The gecko raised his voice, "What kind of insurance do you have?" "I heard what you said," the ant shot back. "I mean what the hell does insurance have to do with helping me get this crumb back to my hill." The sly gecko licked his lips. "You don't have any at all do you? I thought not. Well," The gecko slid off his perch and stood before the ant. "I have some insurance that would be perfect for your needs. It's an Anti-Crush policy for ants working in high traffic areas." "How is that going to help me? You're such an idiot, Gecko!" Again the ant pulled on his crumb of bread struggling to drag it home. The gecko climbed back on his leaf perch out of the path of the on-coming charge of beetles. He watched as the ant was trampled into the dust and dirt. Shaking his head he climbed further up on his leaf and yelled down at the herd of beetles, "Special today only on Ants Between The Toes policy!" |
| Name: Samantha Species: Red wolf Position: Perched on a rock. "The Sea Pig and the Land Pig." "There once was a scotoplane, playing in the sea.* It waved to the porcine on shore, and yelled 'Come on in and join me!' Together we'll explore Hadal chasms of coral Rushing about in groves of living rock with colours so floral! We'll take tea with giant squid, in the endless depths so blue Tour a thousand shipwrecks-just me and you!' The pig put trotter to forehead, giving it some thought. But then he shrugged, stepped forward, and said "Why-ever the not?" He jumped on into the flat ocean so blue- (cough) And then he was abducted because the sea-pig was really just a terribly, terribly disguised alien." (*Note: I really didn't want to make it a poem, but I felt the opening lines rhymed too well to resist. Sorry about that, Steve.) |
| The Dog and the Wolf A dog walked along a fence, that he'd been ordered to guard. On the other side, a wolf lay under a tree. "Why do you always patrol that fence?" the wolf asked. "Because it's what my master wants," the dog said. "And for it, I get food and a place to stay." "I go where I want, and stay where I want," said the wolf. "I get my own food, and I find my own place." "Then why are you here?" the dog asked. "To distract you from getting to the chicken coop," the wolf said. "By now my pack has made off with them, and now, the only thing you'll get is the boot." |
| Once there were two different animals. Both had tails hanging from their ... their ... where tails hang from. And of these two tails is my one tale. So the two tails got entwined, and formed a knot. "They've tied the knot, they've tied the knot!" the other animals rejoiced, and drank lime juice to celebrate. "We have not!" they squeaked and neighed back, respectively. "You have knot!" the animals said, in glee, and drank orange juice to celebrate. "What the heck," the two animals said. "Let's just live happily ever after." And thereby is the tale of two tails. |
The Tale of The Tree, The Squirrel and Honey... The squirrel sat high up in the tree watching. Tilting his head to the side, he looked pensive as he saw the new family taking up residency in the little house that shared a yard with his family's tree. The tree had been here long before the house or the fence or even the road. The little tree survived while hundreds of others never survived their first year. A dirt road was created just by folks driving pickups to a spot near the little tree. Some of those trucks brought concrete blocks and wood and nails. Some men built the little house between the dirt road and the tree. The tree grew. The road was paved. Some more men came with fence posts and fencing. They put a fence around a square yard. The house took up almost one whole side of the square. The fencing on the other sides separated the little tree's yard from the fields around it. The tree grew. Soon it was big enough to hold a family of its own: the squirrels. Now it became the squirrels' home - the squirrels' tree and the squirrels' yard. Families moved in and out of the little house. A squirrel family lived in the tree and played in the yard. The squirrel watched the new family: an old lady, a young woman and a little girl. Lots of other children were there, too. They didn't live there but came and stayed for hours and sometimes for days on end. Then one day a new member of the family arrived: A DOG! The dog came into the yard and the first thing she did was made a mad dash for the squirrel. Fortunately for the squirrel, he was relatively close to his tree and scurried post haste to the safety of its branches. Again, quizzically eyeing the new black and tan member of the family. The dog was an Airedale. The humans called the dog Honey. The squirrel didn't know the dog's full name was Arevalo's Honey Blossom. These humans were not Arevalos but had ended up taking Honey in and providing her with a home in the square, fenced in yard with the squirrel's tree. Now the squirrel had to be leery. He had to look around for Honey anytime he wanted to leave the safety of the high branches or the hidden nest. The squirrel learned quickly. A short reconnaissance mission down the trunk of the tree. Alert to any movement in the yard, the squirrel would check the circumference of the yard. If a bounding black and tan beast appeared, zoom, the squirrel would fly as fast as his legs could carry him back up to the security height offered. With Honey around, it was a challenge to leave the tree at all. The only way for the squirrel to go on a neighborhood jaunt was to go to the base of the tree and across the yard to the fence. Before Honey had come to live in the square yard around the tree, this was a leisurely walk. After Honey, the squirrel would slowly make it reconnaissance mission down the trunk and then scurry as fast as he could across the yard to the fence. The squirrel only stopped for a breath once it had gone over or through the fence and was on the other side. The squirrel didn't get to play in the fenced in yard around his tree like he did before the black and tan beast made her first appearance. A few years passed. One day, if the squirrel had been noticing, he might have seen a car with a pet carrier pull up on the other side of the house. The squirrel might have seen a kindly person helping Honey into the carrier while the old lady and the children looked very sad. The squirrel might have seen tears flowing that day and heard talk of Honey moving to Chicago. The squirrel didn't notice these things and for a while, the squirrel kept up it daily routine. Down the tree slowly looking around. Zoom across the yard to the safety beyond Honey's domain. Then the squirrel did notice something. NO HONEY. Could it be? The squirrel had not seen the hairy beast in days. He still made the slow reconnaissance mission but did not dash for the fence. Instead, the squirrel extended the slow reconnaissance into the yard - across the yard to the fence. No dog. The next day, the squirrel's walk was more relaxed. Before a month was out, there were no more reconnaissance missions. The enemy had vacated the territory. The squirrel's kingdom again extended from the tree to the fence and everything in between. The old lady watched from a window in the house. Were those tears in her eyes? The lady missed Honey. The time had come she was not able to care for the big dog. She had found her a home far away. She cried the day Honey left. She cried the day the squirrel no longer made a bee line for the fence and then... Eventually, she laughed. The squirrel became a pet from a distance. The old lady could watch its antics and laugh. The squirrel could take care of himself, all the lady had to do was watch out the window for the adventure of the day. Not as warm and loving as Honey but maybe as entertaining in a wild kind of way. And that is the tale of the Tree and the Squirrel and Honey... |
| ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** THE HEN AND THE ZEBRA At last Miss Prissy gained the safety of her hen-house, dropped her shopping bag beside the sofa, and sank exhausted into its cushions. She touched her thigh and winced. I'll have a right big bruise by the morning. She glared at the framed picture above her new tv, depicting a fish riding a bicycle. How typical! Foghorn flies the coop on one of the rare occasions he could actually be of some use round here! Swans off to the other end of Kentucky without as much as a bye-your-leave. Sends a postcard crowing about what a good time he's having and how some fancy colonel has invited him to his mansion for dinner. Then not so much as a tweet from him! If I'd known he was going away I'd have got him to put sand on that path. It's like a sheet of glass in this weather. The sight of her new tv reminded her a favourite programme was starting. She had upgraded from her ancient black-and-white so that she could enjoy the gardening, wildlife, and travel programmes in living colour. Unfortunately this fancy tv had not even an on/off button. Everything had to be done using the tv remote, that is, the same tv remote she kept losing. She limped about trying to locate it, eventually finding it under her shopping bag. The tail-end of the Weather Forecast appeared in living colour. Apparently the cold spell would continue for at least a week with particularly heavy frosts at night. Miss Prissy groaned as she thought of the steep winding path to her house. I'll have to get something done! Freakin Foghorn! When the next programme began she stared in disgust as the colour drained from the screen leaving black and white stripes. "I DO NOT BELEEEVE IT!" she shouted. "I've had it only two days and it's bloody banjaxed!" She stabbed furiously at random buttons on the remote control which, since it was pointed at the ceiling, had no effect. Then the programme title appeared: ZEBRAS . Relieved, Miss Prissy grumbled, "Just my luck." and settled down to watch. Very interesting, very informative indeed thought Miss Prissy as the programme ended.I'd no idea zebra's urine can contain plentiful amounts of grit. I may just have the solution for my path problem. Miss Prissy did not know any zebras personally but she did know that Esmeralda, her flighty neighbour, was rumoured to have a business relationship with a certain zebra. What was his name again? ... Ah ... Yes that's right, Zeb. "Esmeralda? Miss Prissy here. How are you, dear?" "Busy. Double busy. I've been flying around this place dusting and cleaning." Yes, and I'm the Queen of Sheba thought Miss Prissy, who had a low opinion of Esmeralda's housework. "I'm hoping you can help me, Esmeralda. I'm looking to hire a zebra. Do you know of any available?" There was a long pause before Esmeralda responded, "Okay, I have the Bookings Diary now. When is your hen-party?" "Oh, there's no party. It's just for myself." "Really? Well ... he does do the occasional private session." "Oh ... um ... good." said Miss Prissy, rather puzzled. "Does he charge by the hour? What are his rates?" "It depends on the client's requirements. Do you require a full strip or just the removal of his pyjama top?" "Oh, good grief! No no no! Nothing like that!" said Miss Prissy, shocked. "It's his, his ... um ... urination services I require." It was Esmeralda's turn to be shocked, utterly shocked. "I'm shocked, utterly shocked!" she said. "Have you been drinking, Miss Prissy? MISS PRISSY - HAH I suggest a name change to something more appropriate! This conversation is at an end! Goodbye!" Miss Prissy awoke with a start. The wildlife programme had long finished and her thigh was throbbing painfully. "Oh, what a horrible dream!" she said. |
| Outstanding round! Wonderful stories! ruwth  and Roscoe  came through with BIG stories! Good work, guys!Round Six is going to be an animal PICTURE round. If you know how to post a pic like Roscoe did, then go ahead and post it. Otherwise, post a LINK to a pic. Then I will download that pic from the internet and post it here as an image.OPTIONAL: You can post some commentary with your pic. But just a single link to an animal pic is an acceptable addition. ROUND SIX A Picture of An Animal  . . . . . . . . . . . . ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** . I can't help but think MOTHER NATURE must have a sense of humor when I see this frog! . . . |
| ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
  Um -- yeah. That's the latest pic I uploaded on here! That's Dad and me! |
| Hope this works... QUESTION: "Who is ruwth?" ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ANSWER: All of the above. |
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Really? Another Picture? |
| Name: Esmeralda Species: Ladybird Posture: Preening herself in a tiny hand mirror. . ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** . "They do say that imitation is the highest form of flattery." She stretched her tentacles out and then slowly re-curled them. "Even the little humans love me!" . . . |
| What happens when a zebra can't resist a hot pig? This: (Everybody say Aaaaaah) ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Mind you, I don't know what Esmeralda is doing in this photo. Possibly she's just being nosy. |
| It was a dark and stormy night Yes yes I know that start is trite And in this storm there flew a kite No not child's toy - a bird, alright? It scanned the ground for tasty bite Both for itself and its wee mite Back in the nest still sleeping tight No no it wasn't black and white It dived and banked no not Wells Fargo It soared, alone, like Greta Garbo No no she wasn't in Key Largo From now on there's remark embargo A silage tractor, suckin' diesel Gave rise to hopes of mangled weasel Or chopped field mice cuz even these'll Make better meal than bit of cheese'll Eventually the storm abated Kite brought a meal where chick awaited "It's KFC!" said chick, elated The mother thought it over-rated |
| It was a dark and stormy night The sounds of the jungle were not quite right all the resonances began to funnel Swelling to an extreme height The thunder roared among the vines Shaking monkeys from their strong holds Releasing-- they fell in groups of nines And rolled into nice little folds Forming several straight lines The lightning struck their once proud tree On that dark and stormy night And all around could easily see Their awkward and awful plight As they stood together to pee The gushing stream was not enough To quench the flames of fire Burning their home and all their stuff Except one charred old tire On that dark and stormy night it all burned up |
| It was a dark and stormy night. The rain came, and washed the spider out. Now was the time to get home Before things got all serious. So the spider spent the night Over at the fly's place Where it was nice and dry. |
| It was a dark an stormy night. Or, as Snoopy the beagle would have it, unbeknownst to anyone, it was a dark and stormy night. Which just shows the brilliance of Charles Schulz, because if there's one thing a dark and stormy night ISN'T, it's unbeknownst. I mean, it's the most beknownst thing, one would think, wouldn't one? So Snoopy was tapping away at the typewriter, and he wrote things like unbeknownst to anyone it was a dark and stormy night, and all of us laughed and that's where I'll leave it because it's nice to have everyone laughing. |
| It was a dark and stormy night on Writing.Com, a perfect time for reading and reviewing... "Invalid Item" : "It Was A Dark And Stormy Night!" 13+: Writers just don't say "Merry Christmas", they write stories about it. "It Was A Dark and Stormy Night" 13+: A woman's walk home turns into a nightmare, her attacker marking her forever. "It was a dark and stormy night" 13+: Lost in the middle of nowhere, in that most cliche of circunstance "Invalid Item" : "Invalid Item" : NOTE: Read and write a public review for any of these and send me a link to your review/s. On the next dark and stormy night, I will send some gps your way!  That's my story and I'm stickin' to it... |
It was a dark and stormy night much to the mouse's delight. The owl got all wet and couldn't fly yet, So the mouse's future was bright! |
T'was a dark and stormy night when I met a woodland sprite flying by on a crow, crying "Ho! Ho! Ho!" and brandishing a Fairy Light! |
| It was a dark and stormy night, An otter and a beaver were having a fight! "Houses are pointless! You should just swim free!" "A lodge is a fortress! In there, nothing can get me!" They gesticulated and they growled Tails lashed the water, as the bickering duo scowled. It wasn't until nightfall that the pair relented And the otter at last grimly consented. "So maybe I'm not secure in a muddy mire But at least I'll never die in a building fire!" |
| A bunch of kids were looking at a tank in the terrarium section of the zoo. "Can you see it?" the one asked. "Is that it over there in the corner?" asked another. "Yeah, that must be it," said the one. "A master of disguise." At that moment, one off the keepers opened the top of the tank and set a lizard in it. "Actually, here's the little bugger - the chameleon keeps on sneaking out." |
A story I wrote for "The Writer's Cramp" after a visit to a zoo.
|
This time, hopefully, I am going to follow the prompt.  Something about a zoo... I have had many zoo experiences. Two stand out in my mind: The elephants at the zoo in Atlanta, Georgia: They were playfully rolling around like kittens. I never realized elephants would play in this way. I was mesmerized. It is the one event I wish I could have recorded for posterity. I tell folks about it but I do not have the words to make it real. It was amazing. The lion's roar at the Peoria, Illinois zoo: It SHOOK the ground! I was at a snack bar nearby the lions. A male began roaring and the ground where I was SHOOK. I knew experientially why this beast is called the king of the jungle. AMAZING! So loud and powerful a sound! I will likely NEVER forget it. |
| In April 2014 I was able to relive one of my favourite childhood memories. My 10 year old grandson, Ernie, decided that he would like to visit Belfast Zoo on Easter Monday. As a child in Belfast, one of my fondest memories was our annual adventure to the Zoo to roll our Easter eggs down Cave Hill. It involved us taking 2 buses from one side of the city to the other carrying our 'piece' (sandwiches) in a brown paper carrier bag. The Zoo is on a steep hill on the outskirts of the city, with spectacular views, so finding a good spot meant an early start in the morning. The other adults in the family were not that keen to go, but Ernie and I worked on them and we duly set out to rendezvous at the car park. That was our first hurdle. The world and his wife had had the same idea. The Zoo had obviously retained its allure as the place to be on Easter Monday. The traffic jams where unbelievable, but Ernie was adamant, (and I agreed with him). We found a parking space and boarded the shuttle bus to the Zoo. Once we got into the Zoo, the atmosphere was brilliant. It was one of those rare hot sunny days that we sometimes get in April. My older grandson had mapped out a route for us and he shepherded us round so that we didn't miss a thing. We did the whole thing. Candy floss, ice cream and silly hats as well as rolling our eggs. I'm not sure how much the others enjoyed it, but Ernie and I had a ball. A definite highlight of that Easter. |
| Despite the wonderful conservation work carried out by zoos I still have misgivings. Given the amount of genetic material we share with other species it seems it required only a small percentage shift in chromosomes and we humans would be behind the bars and in the glass tanks being used for the research and the amusement of chimps or cockroaches or whatever. However Dublin, Ireland has a pleasant zoo eulogised by strange bearded creatures known as The Dubliners. Music and lyrics here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebYOvdtGlSs |
Words from me to you: ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** "Decisions, decisions, decisions . . ." "11 days in a row . . ." "21 days in a row! Today's focus: What is success?" NOTE: My addition will be different every time you load it.  |
How the zebra got his stripes, why does the mantis pray This campfire was a lot of fun but now it is time so say: Goodbye! Thank you for including me! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| Thank you for taking the time to do this, Steve. It has been great fun! Good-bye |
zebra got his stripes no one really knows how come now our tale is done 'Goodbye, and thanks for all the fish!'      |
| Just time to put the accent on my hero, that mashter of mimicry, Sean Connery. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Each of the images above is my copy, right? Time now for another shingle malt. Cheersh! Thanks, Steve, for the fun ride. Roscoe |
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