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 Review #3726858 |
 | Consistency of Change  [E] We travel through life ever changing  |
| (4.5)  Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! General Disclaimer: It has been a pleasure to read and review your work. I hope that my comments help you in some way. Accept those that do and just leave the rest!  Hello LizaJane !A big welcome to WDC! I hope you are enjoying your stay here very much. It was nice reading this narration of strong hope and positive attitude. I like the topic you have chosen to speak about here. If there was no change, Earth would indeed be a horrible place to live in. We might not realize that now, but we shall, whenever life comes to a stop. Bad times teach us so many things, make us stronger to worse times that may come. Happy times teach us to value the little things that have the potential to bring a smile on everyone's face. The best thing about this piece of writing is how you have shared your positive spirit with us. It takes a lot of courage to accept the change. It seems like you are quite good at that!  While I was going through this piece, I noted the following things that I would like to mention:  No new friends, No (after comma, the first letter need not be capitalized) new babies brought into the world --- I noted you have done this in some other places as well. You might want to smooth those out. We would not experience the often gratifying whoop of Hey I got it!Here, I found some punctuation missing. See this: We would not experience the often gratifying whoop of "Hey, I got it!" Reads smoother, doesn't it? With Change we have the consistency of being more than we were for better or worse. --- Though I have mentioned about the change in case above, I would specially like to point this one here. I somewhat get that here you have capitalized C of change to give some emphasis upon it. Though it feels right in a way, you can just do away with it. The whole of your piece provides enough emphasis to the concept of change. But hang on to your hat folks (comma missing here) cause (cause sounds more like conversational English, rather than written one. Maybe you can make it because)we know that there is something new on the horizon! This aside, I would like to say something about how you have created this item. I noted that you have not provided any Item Type or Genre of writing in this piece. For future purposes, it is good if you know that adding these things make your writings more visible on WDC page, and easier for your readers to find them. As writers we all want to be read, don't we? These little things would make your writings more visible to the community.Overall, it was nice reading this. Please keep sharing with the community! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Check out our newbie forum
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You last responded to this review 07/01/2012 @ 1:59pm EDT