Hey, 1UppyEar!

This is my review for Chapter 8.

I really like this deeper glimpse into the differences between Rose and Tessa. It's also a closer look at how Rose was treated by her parents and their views on her life like the clothes and boyfriend. Which, I expect is not like Rose.

You're capturing some great feelings and insight here with how she is dealing with things, and she seems pretty logical about it. It's funny, but it really shows an 'adult' mentality the way she sees and dissects things.

One thing I was just thinking about, so for the most part she is holding it together on the outside, but in private or with the doc she falls apart. I am wondering that even if she is a strong woman, she'd lose her cool more often with, say, the mom. LOL

I did go back and reread chapter 1 a few weeks back, but other than that I restarted at chapter 5, so I may not be remembering if there was more. I am just thinking about her being more depressed or at least moody. She compared the lose of her husband and children to them being dead in one of the earlier chapters, I believe. Losing one person is devastating, but a whole family would be a million times worse. Now, I'm not suggesting that she lay in bed all day crying and not eating and not bathing and such, since that's what I'd do! Especially since she is trying to get back to them, so she has hope to get her through some of it. But it may be something to consider.

I was surprised about this (in a good way), but it definitely is something she needed to consider, but her talking about her having a past that may or may not be real. That is pretty important, but I don't think that is the case here.

I like how when the doc suggests she talk to Rose's dad about helping her get a job, she thinks about her late father and a second chance. I can totally relate here. I lost my dad when I was a child, and when Nick and I got married, I was thrilled at the prospect of 'getting another father'. I obviously don't see him as my dad exactly, but we have grown closer and have a special relationship that is ours. I can see this being something that will help her adapt some, since having this man 'sub' in, she can potentially grow close with him out of a yearning to recapture something/someone she lost.


***

"Paul and I are getting going out this Saturday.” I twist a strand of hair around my finger.

Remove 'getting'.



He frowns, deep in thought. “Let’s try a visualization exercise. Close your eyes and we’ll do some guided relaxation.”


Okay, so I am just learning Deep POV, so I may be wrong here. But, I wanted to point out that you state the doc frowns deep in thought. I wonder if she is just guessing here that he is 'deep in thought'. Let me know either way. I am still trying to learn when the POV character is just guessing or can exactly tell. I figure we somewhat talked about this and I wanted to point it out just in case.



This is great!

His voice fades as I become the water in the river, a rushing force carving a path out of hardened rock. I am strong, powerful, yet cool and calm. I can go with the flow and not cower to unreasonable expectations. I am in control of my emotions, behaviors, and decisions.



“It was liberating at first. I passed a cookie booth and didn’t have anyone begging me for one and never once did I worry I’d lose Landon in the crowd...


I have to say this stuck out to me. She is talking about missing her children, her family always a part of her and her thoughts, but if felt odd that she said that she never once worried about losing her son in the crowd. I know myself as a parent that even if my daughter is not with me or she is gone for the summer, every time I hear 'mom' or something similar, I think it's my daughter or I expect that she is there with me. I would think that out of habit she may still be worried and catch herself checking for the child. It almost seems like she is used to being without her one child here, but not the others.



He smirks, face brightening. "Ah, but it's not.” He tosses the pen on the coffee table with a clatter. “Several of my colleagues have reported incidents of people waking from comas with memories of other people.” He interlaces his fingers over his stomach, relaxed yet emgaged (engaged). “Most have complete memory replacement, though some have some bleed through of previous memories."

In the very last sentence, you have two 'somes' close together and it sounds funny to me. May I suggest:

"Most have complete memory replacement, though some have previous memories bleed through."

I actually like the second 'some' for the sentence, though I didn't use it in my example because I don't know what you mean by 'some' in number terms for people. Such as: a few, a bunch, many, whatever vague description you need for it. But, these would be to replace the first 'some'. I think I just confused myself. In case you can't follow my jumble of words I'll give an example:

“Most have complete memory replacement, though a few have some bleed through of previous memories."

I hope that clears up the puddle of mud I stirred up :)



"Yes. I'm still trying to track down the details. If I can get you names of the patients or the therapists, I will. For now, you can tell Rose's family that it is not completely unheard of."


I am wondering here if he'd really give out patient names. I think that would be a breach of HIPPA privacy laws and patient-doctor confidentiality. Especially since not everyone would be okay with having others, let alone strangers, knowing they needed counseling. But, it may be another thing that is different in your book, I don't know. It just hit me because I worked as a secretary in an ER for 8 years and HIPPA was a huge deal. If someone didn't know a name, we could not say that they were there, and even if they knew a name, we could not disclose why or anything else about the patient.



All right! If you have any issues or questions or answers to my questions :) send me a message! Oh, and if I was totally off with the POV stuff, let me know and I will avoid it in the future so I am not wasting your time with CORRECTING me!

Talk to you later,
Kat

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .