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391 Public Reviews Given
391 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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126
126
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey,

I enjoyed this, its very simple to understand and easy to read.
You say this is 'season 2' so I'm guessing there is a background story, ahead of where we come in. Therefore, I would suggest some kind of preface, so we don't just jump in straight off.
There are a few basic grammatical and punctuation mistakes [including layout - but that may be down to website formatting], but its nothing a touch of proofreading wouldn't fix [either by you or, even better, someone else].

I'm looking forward to the next chapter x
127
127
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I am not sure whether this style of poetry is unique or not, since my poetry education is somewhat limited, I am sorry to say. However, I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. I found it to be a very clever way to get all the terrible ordeals of asylums and imprisonment into one piece of writing, with out having to produce a much longer and more detailed description.
At first I obviously read each poem individually and thought they were pretty good by themselves, then I established what you meant by reading all three together. And to be honest, I thought they were even better this way.
My only comment, or bit I didn't like, would be in the 2nd poem:

'The drugs
They burned'

And this is only because I read it as "the drugs - they burned" so it didn't flow as well as I would have liked. Nevertheless, when reading all three together as one, it works perfectly.

Good job - keep it up!
128
128
Review of The Sound  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I really enjoyed this! I, myself, have been driven crazy by noises and flashing lights etc - although i cant say its ever put me in debt/hospital before!
I'll be honest, because it made me smile, I cannot decide if it was too long/detailed or not. There were a few moments when i thought 'get to it now' but i think they were cured by another bout of humour!
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