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by CamF
Rated: E · Script/Play · Other · #1716448
Nope. Nope. Nope.
Tantasqua Web Series: Episode 1: The Pilot

Shot of Tantasqua, halls perhaps, with voiceover

Narrator
If you really want to hear it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is what the hell (curse?) a Tantasqua is. I’m not gonna give some overly-metaphorical high-school-graduation-speech kind of crap about what it means to me, I’m gonna give you the truth.

[Title sequence here?]

Junior Parking Lot
Narrator
Some sign by the old lead mine calls Tantasqua “the land between two hills”, what does that mean anyway, cleavage? [risqué?] Tantasqua is just a High School, but to some, it’s their whole world.
Enter Bradley and Brooke with Rachael
Bradley
[Something about the football game last night]
Brooke
[Continuing the conversation, et cetera]

Rachael with crutches kicking her bag that is on a skateboard
Bradley
[Talking about junior lot moving, what a hassle it is for him to walk]
Brooke
[Agreeing, complaining about carrying her pom poms]
Background Rachael falling, various other clumsy things
Rachael
No, sure, I’m fine. Don’t compound fracture your tibia trying to help me out. (Sarcasm) Jerks…(not sarcasm)
Cut to Marcy hiding behind a car watching Brook and Brad
As they pass she steps out walking beside them, clipboard etc
Marcy
Hey Broo-adly-y-ke? (Pronounced Brew-adley-eke)
Brooke
I thought we established that B-squared was our celebrity couple name! The Brangelina doesn’t work for us. Put that on the record.
Marcy writes on the clipboard
Marcy
[Something about it taking ____ more minutes (really precise number) for them to get to the lot than normal]
Brooke
[Something about having the senior lot fill up]
Bradley
[Something about how he deserves his own spot, Captain of the football team and all]
Marcy
[Mentioning that maybe “the one”* could hook them up with one]

Brooke
[“put that on the record” set up a meeting with him]
Passing by the school store at this point, Kathy in the window
Inside the school store, Kathy cramming with tons of notes and a textbook
Narrator
Kathy, light of my life. My sin, my soul. Ka-thy-Smalljacket: the tip of the tongue taking a stumble down three stair sets to tap, at six, on the teeth. Ka-thy-Smalljacket. {Nabokov reference, thinking literary references would be a rather cool motif for the narrator..}

Enter: Norwood and Todd
Norwood
Cramming? What for?
Kathy
Yeah. I don’t even know, I have four tests today, each for a different AP Class. Anyway, what can I help you with?
Todd
Oh nothing, we just saw you studying and thought that you might like some… help. From, a certain… figure.
Kathy
I don’t need any “cheat codes” from your boss. Life isn’t a video game y’know, there are consequences for that kind of stuff.
Norwood
Fair enough. Just think of all the time you’re wasting studying… The one’s door is always open Kathy. See you in AP.
Norwood and Todd exit



Kathy shakes her head and goes back to studying, stops, puts her hand on her chin as if thinking
Cut back to the “geeks” they enter a dark room, keeps going to stair well/isolated area
Sitting in a corner are Lexie, Logan and Extras
Narrator
But Tantasqua to some is defined as: Place that I’m legally obligated to show up to.
Logan
You ever think about how much power this place has over you? I mean like, we have to ask to go to the bathroom
Lexie
Sometimes you can’t even go, because some people are smoking in the bathrooms (kid coughing gets stared down)
Logan
This place just bothers me so much. We’ve got all these cheerleaders and jocks who think they run the school; we’ve got the power hungry geeks who do run the school…
Lexie
And all these poseurs who think they’re dark. Twilight is not gothic, neither are all these lame screamo bands.
Logan
Yeah, yeah. I’ve heard your Lovecraft and The Cure rant a million times…
Bell/Bleep
Lexie
Y’know… We could get some late passes from…

Logan
Nothing he gives out is free though…
Lexie
Let’s at least go check it out.
Dark room that the Geeks turned into previously, Bradley, Brooke, and Kathy are seated outside a door
Todd and Norwood guard the door, Logan and Lexie enter
Narrator
Tantasqua isn’t like the cliché highschool where the geeks get bullied. With this Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg trend we have going on, they are more powerful than ever before.
Todd does a secret knock on the door
Norwood
So you’re here to see The One?
Narrator
And the most powerful of them all, goes without a name. He is The One.
Door slowly opens
The One
Come in. Let’s see what we can arrange.
[end]

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