Our Wicked Cool Teacher

Right from September, it was a strange school year. I remember how on the first day of school, I walked into the sixth grade classroom and saw my teacher.

Her name was Ms. Doyle. She didn´t look that old. In fact, she looked almost young enough to still be in High School. But the weird part was that she was dressed completely in a long black dress. Not only that, her hair was jet black, she was wearing black nail polish, and black lipstick. Also around her neck, she was wearing something around her neck which looked like a star with five points. I didn´ think teachers were allowed to dress like that. On the other hand, she had a rather bright smile which was kind of pretty.

¨Good morning, class,¨ she said. ¨I hope you´re all as overjoyed to be here today as I am!¨

That produced an unenthusiastic response from the class.

¨Anyway, we´re going to have so much fun this year! Not to mention you might actually learn something from time to time.¨

That caused some giggles to pass through the room, but then a sarcastic voice said, ¨What does she put in her hair, prune juice?¨

¨Who said that?¨ asked Ms. Doyle.

Now, if it had been me, I would have kept my mouth shut and hoped that she forgot about it. But the remark came from a girl name Dena Angelo. Dena always wore nice dresses to school and did her hair perfectly. Moreover, by sixth grade, she had a reputation for being one of the bravest girls in the school. So she smiled and said, ¨I did, Ms. Doyle. Honestly, do you ever look in a mirror?¨
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I guess she expected Ms. Doyle to be insulted and the rest of the class to laugh, but Ms. Doyle didn´t look too insulted. Instead, she said, ¨You know, it´s not nice to make remarks about how other people look. How would you like it if someone made fun of those green things on your face?¨

Dena looked like she was about to think of some smart comeback, but then she looked alarmed as she seemed to realize what Ms. Doyle had said. ¨Green things?¨

But Ms. Doyle was right. There were several large green spots that looked something like pimples growing on Dena´s face. In fact, they were growing bigger by the minute. Expanding so that they almost looked the size of golf balls.

¨Maybe you should go to the bathroom and wash up,¨ said Ms. Doyle. Then the class laughed as Dena let out a scream and went running out of the classroom.

Then there was recess. Billy Davis, Fred Garner, and Jimmy Snap all announced that the class was going to play dodgeball. Now, I don´t really like dodgeball. Especially when those guys played it, but Billy Davis would say, ¨Come on Albert. Get in the circle. Then, he´d make me stand in the circle while he threw the ball straight at my chest, so that I fell to the ground.¨

Then, I´d try to pick myself up and say, ¨Well, I guess I´m out.¨

But Billy would say, ¨No, you´re not. It only counts if I hit you from the waist down. Now get back in the circle.¨

Of course, that waist down rule was supposed to keep people from sending the ball at your head and it usually worked if you were playing with someone who wanted to win. Unfortunately, Billy didn´t seem to want to win. Throwing the ball at my head and knocking me down was more fun for him anyway.

He had knocked me down about five times when I saw Ms. Doyle out of the corner of my eye. was watching the playground, I guess. It made me feel worse because I liked her, and I didn´t like having her see me like this. But then, she waved her hands in the air and there was a loud crack. At first, I thought it was thunder, but it was a bright sunny day. Still, something that looked like lightning came down and struck Billy right on the seat of his pants.

¨Ow!¨ cried Billy jumping up and down. ¨I´ve been struck by lightning! Help! I´m going to be electrocuted!¨

¨Don´t be silly,¨ said Ms. Doyle coming over. ¨You´re just having all that bad Karma catch up with you. Now why don´t you sit down and rest quietly for the remainder of recess.¨

Then she turned to me. ¨Albert, you shouldn´t let people push you around like that.¨ She very gently put her hand on my chin and smiled.

Somehow that made me feel better about everything. ¨I hate dodgeball,¨ I said.

¨Yeah? What do you like to do?¨

I shrugged. ¨I like writing stories.¨

¨Really. What kind of stories?¨

¨All kinds. Funny stories. Scary stories.¨

¨How interesting!¨said Ms. Doyle. ¨Maybe you can read some stories to the class later this year.¨

That didn´t sound like much fun. I was sure the rest of the class would laugh at me, but before I could say no, she smiled again and said, ¨Don´t say ´no´. Think about it.¨

Eventually, October came around and the class started talking about Halloween. Now, I´ve learned that most teachers don´t like Halloween parties very much. I´ve had mean teachers that flat out forbid the class from having them and I´ve had nice teachers that reluctantly tolerated them, but Ms. Doyle seemed to get as excited about a class Halloween party as anyone. She appointed a girl named Jill Robinson to be the organizer, but then she made a terrible suggestion. She said that I should write a scary story and read it to the class at the party. I tried to stop her, but the entire class liked the idea and I didn´t know how to get out of it.

It was about a week after the party had been announced that Dena made an announcement in class. ¨Ms. Doyle,¨ she said. ¨I can´t be in the Halloween party. It´s against my religion to celebrate Halloween.¨ That was ridiculous because everyone in the class remembered just last Halloween Dena had worn a fairy princess costume to school and been quite proud of it.

Still, Ms. Doyle looked a little embarrassed for the first time all year. ¨I-I´m sorry. I guess you can do something else during the party.¨

After school that day, I decided to go to Ms. Doyle´s room and say, Hello.

¨What´s up, Albert?¨ asked Ms. Doyle.

¨Ms. Doyle, would you believe me if I told you that reading a scary story at the Halloween party is against my religion?¨

¨Not at all,¨ she said with a smile.

¨Oh well, it was worth a try.¨

Before I could say anything else, a whole group of students came bursting into the classroom with Dena in front.

¨What´s going on here?¨ asked Ms. Doyle.

¨Ms. Doyle, Are you a witch?¨ asked Dena.

Ms. Doyle didn´t seem as put out by that as you might think. ¨What if I am?¨ she asked.

¨Because if you worship the devil, my parents won´t be happy about you being my teacher.¨

¨Really?¨ Ms. Doyle still sounded unimpressed. ¨Well, I don´t know how to convince you I´m not.¨

That made Jimmy Snap speak. ¨In the olden days, they would tie the witch up and throw her in a lake to see if she floats.¨

¨Not a bad idea,¨ said Dena.

¨Seriously?¨ asked Ms. Doyle. ¨You don´t even have a lake.¨

¨There´s the pool down by the school gym,¨ suggested another boy.

¨Yeah. And I´ll bet we could find a jump rope or something to tie her up with.¨

¨Oh boy,¨ said Ms. Doyle. ¨Well, mind if I get my purse first?¨

I was alarmed. ¨Are you going to let them do this?¨

¨Relax, Albert. I´ll be fine.¨ Then she grabbed her purse and walked out of the classroom with the class.

Well, I didn´t think this was going to be fine. I ran out of the classroom and after thinking for a minute ran to the school office. Mr. Coddington, the principal, was just closing up his office.

¨Hello, Albert,¨ he said. ¨What´s going on?¨

¨Ms. Doyle is in trouble. A group of kids in my class are going to throw her in the pool.¨

¨What?¨ asked Mr. Coddington smiling at me.

¨No really. You need to come fast.¨

Luckily, he listened to me and we ran to the pool. When we got there, Ms. Doyle was already in the water and the students were all gawking because she was, indeed, floating on the surface.

¨What´s going on here?¨asked Mr. Coddington.

¨Ms. Doyle is a witch,¨ said Dena. ¨We should burn her at the stake.¨

¨Don´t be ridiculous,¨ said Mr. Coddington. ¨This is the craziest thing I´ve ever heard. Everyone of you is going to be punished, probably suspended.¨

¨Oh Mr. Coddington,¨ called out Ms. Doyle from the pool. ¨Is that really necessary? After all, I did get a refreshing dip out of it.¨

Mr. Coddington looked into the pool silently for a minute. ¨Ms. Doyle. I think you´d better get out of there.¨

¨I can´t. My hands are tied.

Mr. Coddington sighed, kicked off his shoes, and waded into the pool so that he could carry her out.

¨Now, ¨ he said putting Ms. Doyle down by the side of the pool. ¨I am unbelievably disappointed in all of you. None of you is to leave this school until I´ve called your parents. Except you, Albert.¨

Well that was a relief and I could see by the looks on the other kids´ faces that having their parents called by the principal was enough to really scare them. Even Dena had an alarmed expression on her face.

Then came the strange part.

Ms. Doyle seemed to wiggle her nose. There was a huge crash. Like a thunderbolt, but louder then any that I had ever seen. And there was a huge light. Almost like the entire gymnasium was one completely white light. Too dazzlingly bright to see anything. And when it was gone, something about the room was different. It took me a moment to realize what exactly. Then, I realized that Ms. Doyle was now untied and standing up. She smiled at me and seemed to wink.¨

¨Um. . .Well,¨ said Mr. Coddington. ¨What are all you kids doing in here anyway? You know, it´s after school hours. You shouldn´t be in the building.¨

Everyone in the class looked at each other. ¨You know, I don´t remember why we came in here,¨ said Dena.

¨Neither do I,¨ said Billy. In fact, nobody in the entire class seemed to remember what they were doing there except me. I decided not to say anything.

¨Well, Mr. Coddington,¨ said Ms. Doyle, ¨what are you doing in here?¨

Mr. Coddington took off his glasses and scrunched up his face. ¨That´s a very good question. I can´t remember that either. Oh well. Everyone go home.¨

As the puzzled class walked out of the gym, I lagged behind a little so that I was standing by Ms. Doyle. ¨I remember,¨ I couldn´t help whispering.

She smiled. ¨Well, perhaps you could write it down sometime. She ruffled my hair.

¨What the--?¨ called out Mr. Coddington. ¨Where are my shoes? And how did my feet get wet?