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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item.php/item_id/2109453-Hello-Old-Friend
by T.M.W
Rated: E · Poetry · Educational · #2109453
A poem about the reality of living with bipolar disorder.
I've known you for awhile now
But failed to catch your name
You are there through the sunshine
And beside me during the rain
When others cried dramatic
And condemned me as spoiled
It was then that you and I had began to coil

Saw each other more often as the time began to fly
You were the only one who never asked me why
Even in my room I knew you were near
Your purpose or motive I realize now just wasn't clear
I should have paid attention, now it'
s too late I fear
But, you were what stopped me when I was on the edge
I am great, I am powerful you always would allege
They just don't understand, they could never get it
You don't owe them a thing, don't give them the benefit

Then you showed your true self
After building me up so tall
Now I see it was only so
I would have further to fall
While you watched and while you laughed
My soul was cleaved in half

I know who you are now and I know you by name
Even still my friend it is all just the same
Only difference is the intensity I now feel
When you kick me I can't believe that this pain could be real
When you kissed me at first I couldn't help but squeal
I want to believe even though I know by now
That it is hardly real

We are no longer friends, now that you've been exposed
You still stay and say that you have no place to go
And our relationship to others remains undisclosed
I now must keep you at the furthest distance
To preserve my existence
I do accept now that I require assistance
Not on anyone's but my own somber insistence

I shake when you call and tremble when you're near
For I know to see me is the reason you're here
You slap me and push me instilling your hate
Beg me to join you promising it's not too late
You won't leave me be and I see you more
How can I escape when there is not a door?

Look at this, look at what you've made
You are special, you and them are not the same
You know the answer already to any of their questions
It would demean you to even, consider their suggestion
I am here and will always be
In it to win it kid, just you and me

But I do not want you, no matter how you try
I see you for what you are and I see through the lies
You cannot control me I will not succumb
I made it this far and will not come/be undone
You're wrong there kid, WE came this far
I'm sorry but your wrong my friend, we were driving in my car

I have you figured out now I understand your method
You kick me you beat me until I'm depressive
Then encourage me and tempt me it's just a game to ya
But I understand now friend, that's called mania
You might know this type of ride as a rolling rollercoaster
I have the unfortunate intimacy to know
That it's name is bipolar
© Copyright 2017 T.M.W (trevinmwhite at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item.php/item_id/2109453-Hello-Old-Friend