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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2095501-Love-Potion-Number-16
Rated: 18+ · Short Story · Supernatural · #2095501
A Kate Johnson story to celebrate WDC's 16th birthday
"I think tonight will be very magical. Much like WDC itself." Minerva said to me as she waved me into the room. A mischievous twinkle played in her eye. It was one of the reasons that I loved her and came to this part. Plus, my grandson, Jeff, is a writer and adores Writing.com. "And Kate, there's a little present for you."

My eyes followed hers over to the hunky vampire. He was sitting in the corner brooding. Not a sparkle in sight, like those other vampires that the teens fell in love with. "He's gorgeous. I wonder if I'm his type."

"He does like his women to be younger than him. And you are an infant by his definition. He's 16,000 years." It was the first time in more years than I care to admit that I was younger than someone I was interested in. "Be careful though, Anya is here and she has her sights set on him. I've already caught her rifling through my portfolio looking for a love spell."

Anya the werewolf. She also wrote really bad romance novels. The best part of any of her books was the shirtless guys on the cover, holding the buxom babe with her breasts nearly exposed. To say she and I weren't friends would be an understatement. Donald Trump and the truth were closer than Anya and I. "Of course she did. She's a hack and desperate spinster. She's Jennifer Aniston before Justin Theroux."

Minerva smiled and started greeting more guests. My steel grey hair hadn't moved since the 1980's but I still poofed it up, as I headed over to the hot vampire. "Please don't ask to see my torso. It doesn't sparkle and I'm not one of those girly vampires that women seem to love in this day and age."

"Oh goodness no! Those vampires make me madder than an anonymous poster on the internet." He rewarded me with a chuckle that sounded like it came from a real man. "I'm Kate Johnson, a ghost detective."

"I'm Kyle. At least that's my name for this century. A friend told me that my real name is too hard to pronounce for people not born during my time. I write meaningful poetry that is so depressing that nobody on WDC reads it."

"I'd love to read something you've written." Somehow, and I don't know how it happened but one of my boobs popped out of my dress. Not so much popped out as I tugged the dress down and let it flop out. Kyle's eyes were like magnets and my nipple was metal. "What's your username?"

Minerva waved her hand in the air, it looked like she had a wand but I wasn't paying attention. Kyle let out a long sigh as if he were annoyed by my question, which somehow made him even sexier to me. "Why don't we go somewhere more private and I'll show you."

"Kate!" The warmness that rushed through me, went as cold as Mariah Carey when asked about Jennifer Lopez. It belonged to my former husband George. He followed me around like a lovesick puppy. "There's my beloved wife."

"I've told you a million times, I am no longer your wife. Our vows said 'til death do you part.' We are both dead now, so death has parted us." Men don't listen any better in the afterlife, sorry ladies. Kyle wrapped his cape around himself and left us. "Why can't you leave me alone?!"

"Because I love you, snickerdoodle. And I know deep down you love me too!"

"When we were alive, I loved you. Now I love Channing Tatum, have you seen him in the shower? That's heaven enough for me."

George walked away, dejected. Sometimes it's kinder to be cruel. George and I were good together when we were alive but now that I was dead, I was having too much fun. And I wanted to get to know Kyle a little bit better and maybe see if he would sink his fang into me. Kyle sat in the corner, phone out and he was typing furiously. "Sorry about that. George seems to think that we're still married. I told him I want to get to know you better."

"Connection is very important. Like we're all cosmically interconnected." Glasses of champagne flew into our hands as the lights dimmed and Minerva floated above us all.

"Ladies and gentleman, tonight we celebrate 16 years of Writing.com. The site brings together writers in an effort for them to help one another. Here's to 16 more years and a night of the unexpected." Everyone raised their glasses and clinked with those closest to them.

Kyle pulled me into a kiss. His lips were as soft and sweet as cotton candy. My head swirled with thoughts about what it would be like to visit his coffin with him. It had been so long since I had been with a man or in this case a supernatural being. Can ghosts have sex? That was something I should have asked Deondra before she went off to help archeologists find dinosaur bones.

"Would you like to, um, go to my place and read some of my poetry?" Kyle asked, avoiding making eye contact with me. "A pretty young thing like you, probably doesn't want to spend time with an old man like me. But you miss 100% of the stones you don't throw."

I had no idea what he meant but it sounded like I was about to get my groove back, so I nodded. From the corner of my eye, I saw Anya kissing George. My George! This wasn't right, he should be mooning over me and not making out with some were-whore.

Minerva came over and pulled me into a hug. "Did the love spell work? I charmed the champagne to make sure everyone found a partner for the evening."

Unbelievable. It was a story as old as Shakespeare and somehow I had fallen prey to it.


© Copyright 2016 Author Ed Anderson (spaz11081 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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