I have done some really stupid things before, but this morning I may just have put the crown on stupid mistakes.

We got up about six, which is not unusual. I put the coffee on for me, went in to make Hubby some green tea (caffeine not too good for a rapid beating heart). Let the dogs out, gave them their morning bisquit and poured my cup of cinnamon joe. We were watching the news and I reached over to take the one daily pill I take. Nope, not birth control, but hormonal rage control. Once a week I count out seven and place them in one of those handy-dandy plastic day-of-the-week pill contraptions. That way I don't wonder if I took the one. It's automatic for me.

So I'm watching tv, glance down to make sure I open the one with the T (for Tuesday), flip the lid open and take my pill. H-m-m-m-m-m, something didn't feel right... OMG...OMG...I jumped up dancing like I could make the pill come UP my throat...

"What's the matter honey?"

"Ohhh...."I stick my finger down my throat and gag.

"What?" By now Lance is worried. "What are you doing??"

"Oh, I forgot I had a half of a sleeping pill in there and I just took it by accident." Now I'm running to the toilet, hoping I can throw it up.

"Don't worry...you won't croak."

Cough-sputter. "I know, but I have things to do, like drive." I can feel the little pill halfway down on my tongue, but my dang finger is too short to reach it, and I have not one thing in my stomach to bring it up with.

"SIGH. Gag. G-U-L-P. I would make a horrifically bad bulemic. I can't even make myself throw up a tiny pill." I wail to Lance, who is laughing by now.

"Here, have a sip of tea." He offers it as I pass him on the way back to bed, defeated and already thinking I'm getting very sleepy.

"Nah. I need COFFEE, I gotta wake up. Today is the day I take you-know-who to get a make-over with JoPaulo." I take a sip of coffee and feel the pill dissolving. Fate accompli I guess. Murphy must be done over in the Knottingham.

I struggled to stay awake this morning, but knowing I better get my shower and hair done because have to leave in a few hours, I managed to drag through the motions. Then I realize SHE is not here, and I don't know how to reach her, or where she is. Gawd.

I dial Lance's number. "Hi Honey, is Mike there?"

"He's just leaving you want him?"

"I just want to know about my 'girly makeover day' with his ...friend. Where do I pick her up or what?" I can hear Lance talking to him.

"He says cancel it."

"Oh," cautiously, "really? How come?"

"He says she can't make it."

"Uhhhh, ok. Thanks." Hmmmm, interesting turn of events. Well, looks like I just got my $200 back....and I get to take a nap!

About an hour later Mike calls me, "Hi mom, it's your son."

"Hi honey!" I say groggily trying to sound upbeat.

"Have I told you lately I love you?"

"Um, no."

"And have I told you the older I get the smarter you get?"



P.S. Happy Birthday Scarlett








 

How many of these kinds of phrases do we use in our ordinary day-to-day conversation without giving any thought as to where they come from? I don’t know either, but I wanted to ask, just in case any of you were so inclined to think about them.

In the third act of Shakespeare’s Othello, he used a cat’s green eyes to metaphorically represent jealousy, and thus we have the term, “the green-eyed monster”.

Anyway, back to my title for today’s blog. Though I actually do have green eyes, I’m certainly no monster...well, maybe now and then, depending who you ask...but I do feel some bits of jealousy. I have been since Friday, and I just can’t keep it in anymore.

HUBBY brought home a new iPhone. Be still my heart. I can pull up WDC on it for goodness sakes, and make the print big enough to read it without my cheaters. THAT all by itself is enough to inspire envy. Gawd, this from the man who barely tolerates change. Yeah, right.

I really like his phone, but it probably doesn’t have IM, so why should I bother. Oh heck, I’d rather be able to surf the web and get WDC really. Don’t worry, I have a year left on my contract before I can switch, and plenty of time to learn the ins-and-outs of his by then!

Hubby’s heart is acting up again, but this morning I took him in for a quick look, EKG, blood test...his heartbeat is really fast, he’s lightheaded and was sweating, but it has not slipped back into the original problem. Nope, this is a new one. He’ll be doing some medicine adjustments and back to LA to meet with his heart doctor on Wed., I sure hope this is something easily fixed this time.

It really breaks my heart to see him have to deal with this after doing so well with the open heart surgery in March, but such is life sometimes. I went to the gym afterwards to help relieve some of the stress I was feeling. Thankfully that works for me.

So, tomorrow is Scarlett birthday, maybe you guys could drop her a note to help cheer her up? I know she does have some kind of outing planned to celebrate, but as is prone to happen, the weather there is supposed to be horrible. I believe it was an open-air boat trip. Gawd, that Murphy guy sure loves to play in Nottingham!

I’d write more, but I’m trying to psyche myself up for yet another night with you know who...cough-cough. I see another Academy nomination in my future. Isn’t there some saying like, “After three days fish and houseguests stink”? H-m-m-m and tomorrow I treat her to a day with JoPaulo. What was I thinking?

Hope your evening goes well. I’m trying to get caught up on the blogs....




 

“I Second That Emotion”-Part 17

Thank you vivacious for the lovely signature

ID: 1409924   (Rated: 18+) I Second That Emotion  A place to house the "mirror blog" series. There are 28 entries in two folders. by Nada

Gawd. Where does time go? Here I am looking at the calendar and not a blue day yet. Well, since it is the first of the month I suppose it is entirely up to me whether to turn the day blue or not...so here I am!

One thousand and nineteen entries into my blog "books" now. Dang, that is a whole bunch of spewing. The amazing part is people are still reading it.

Doing the series on Saturday, as well as the book, means I am a tad short of words by the time I get around to writing a blog. However, I thought maybe I would tell you about my "research".

I've had to dig through boxes of photos and paper memorabilia in order to find stuff for my book, and of course the series. I have a few photo albums I managed to organize, but by and large, mostly they are in plastic bags, no regard for time or place. This consumes vast amounts of time, sifting through my life to find relevant photos. Sometimes I can be driven nearly mad because I remember seeing a photo of a particular event or place and I want to use it. I've taken recently to just making a pile of the pics I know I will want to use at some point in the relevant year.

To complicate matters, I'm currently doing years I have never written about, since my "autobiography" ended with just some references to 1975. I have done a fair amount of living since then. Heck, I had not even met Lance yet, and we have been married 25 plus years! The arrogance of my youth sometimes makes me laugh!

Anyway, it turn out that one of my best friends, whom you will be meeting in 1975, when I did, is also writing a book about her life. She has been for awhile, but is currently hard at work trying to complete it by September. Well, she is writing her chapter(s) on 1976 right now. It seems as though at least three times a week she will call and ask me a question about something we went through together, or just want to take a break, or...like recently, ask me to go online to some link she sends and "verify" whether or not the photo is of us.

This last time she was pretty blown away, and we were on the phone together, both holding our breaths as I opened my mail and clicked on the link, scrolling until....OMG...there we were in a photo, unmistakably us I could verify. And, it had been published in a national magazine, one still in print today! (The photo was taken in 1976...yes, I will be showing you when I get there.) It was contained in a pretty historical document, and for both of us just solidified our place in history.

I know, maybe that sounds overblown, but in light of what was going on in 1976, I hardly think it is. You'll just have to wait to find out what we were up to. ( Of course our names weren't listed, and I think you may see why...but it doesn't matter, I have tons of press clippings from the event to substantiate it.)

That just gives you a taste of what fun I have been having. I just would like to reiterate how much it means to both me and Scarlett for you all to keep up with the series, week after week. I'm so eager to get this all out, I feel like I'm going to bust a gut.

See you all tomorrow, with..."The Way We Were".

P.S...we have a new blogger and he is writing his blog from China, fascinating reading and with the Olympics starting soon, shouldn't we all pop over and say "Welcome"!

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I’m hanging in, lol. Thanks to all of you who asked about us because of the earthquake. We're all fine, no damage. It was 90 miles away, and though my house swayed I was grateful it was not "The Big One."

I sort of left you hanging with the dinner...sorry, but it has taken two days to get things worked out in my brain. Hey, tell me how long it takes you to figure out what to say when you are 11 days shy of 60...nuff said.

I can now tell you with certainty the old adage of, “Smile whether you feel like it or not, and before long you are actually smiling from your heart because it is natural”, WORKS! All I had to do was stop being selfish and think about my son. She makes him happy...at least today. All I have for sure is today to make him happy...to make them happy. Pretty simple concept, and it made the night enjoyable for all of us. My son was beaming, and she, now being treated without contempt or judgment, was pretty normal. Except no thank you, but that happened tonight.

Yes, we may not be best friends, or even on the same page, but I’ve been through some tough times in my life and I was given opportunities to make my life better. She too may need this little extra boost to finally get her life better. It isn’t too late. She needs a woman in her life who can be an example of what she can do with her life. Heck she’s just 42, and she loves my son.

It’s in my attitude...maybe she was put in my life for a reason. Maybe, I can help her achieve more than she thought possible. I’m sure I can learn something from her. It’s flipping my thinking from being negative to positive. It could be more important than anything else. I have been given the opportunity to give her the best parts of me, and look for the positives in her life.

Have I been so stupid to not recognize this as a challenge? It took a few weeks, but I get it now. It took me examining how many things she has gone through that I have also been through. Look for the similarities instead of our differences. I know my son loves and respects me. He’s looking for a woman who is like me. Eureka!

Whew, glad that is clear in my mind.

Now I can tell you the fun stuff. I got my hair done. JoPaulo is the wonder hairdresser. I have so much fun with him. Yes, he is a fabulous hairdresser, no doubt, but we are friends too... kindred spirits in some ways. I always come home in a good mood after he has made me look good. It’s a shame not many of you are able to take advantage of his talent. It is nice we have quite a few things in common, though one might not think so. Hairdressing probably comes in second only to writing in my interest-meter. I think he is one talented hairdresser. I give him a hard time, but he knows I am having fun with him. We both are survivors, vastly different, yet the same. He teaches me new things, and he makes me look good. Cool.


I saw a coyote on my lawn this morning ...I love nature, but it is difficult when you have two small dogs and 40 acres, unfenced for all practical purposes. So far so good though. It was a gorgeous sunrise.

Had a great conversation today with TheWýtçhè - Away Indefinitely , she is a very bright, promising young woman. I worked out at the gym, spoke to someone I’d lost touch with for maybe 10 years, talked to Phyllis yesterday, and my friend Lois. Now I’ve been listening to 70’s songs...I find since I’m in the 70’s for our Sat. series it really gives me an opportunity to recall more by immersing myself. I can’t wait to write the next 10 weeks, I’ve not written these years of my life before. It’s exciting, both because I get to share so much, but more because I realize that I have played a part in our generation’s history...heck, things some of the young people who were just born, or still not born, can take for granted. I am so fortunate. So fortunate to have lived my life.




 

I guess things have been going too well for too long not to have a blip or two crop up.

Hubby had an accident yesterday by the pool. Fortunately because I have been working out, I had the strength necessary to deal with it. He is doing ok, no serious injuries this time.

But the second “blip” is the really scary one. It has to do with my son and a relationship he’s in. I know, he’s a grown man and should be perfectly able to handle his own life. Yeah, I know this, but I am having trouble letting him “handle” this because I see him repeating a past mistake.

I wish someone could have been in my life when I was making my own relationship mistakes. Of course I made them in my teens and twenties. He is making it again in his forties. I tried to explain to him that this is “déjà vu all over again”. I saw him do it in his thirties, the exact same thing. Aaarrgghhh.

Do I want the best for my son? Yes. Did I let him make his mistake before, along with the repercussions? Yes. Does it make it any easier to stand by and watch him doing it again now? Gawd...no.

So here I sit stewing about it. In an hour or so I will have to smile and be polite to this woman’s face over dinner (which she will pick at because she doesn’t eat but avails herself of anyway) when I know dang well how this is going to end. The person who will be hurt most is my son. I have to look at her and know that she is 42, doesn’t know how to say “thank you” for a meal, or a roof over her head, or the spending money she has her fake nails done with, or her cigarettes paid for, or the beer she drinks (mine), or a ride because she has no car.... or for me not smacking her upside the head while she uses my pool and garden for her ashtray. Gawd, someone duct tape my mouth please!

“Thank you” are two simple words I would think you would learn if you were trying to impress your boyfriend’s parents.



 

“I Second That Emotion”-Part 16

Thank you vivacious for the lovely signature

ID: 1409924   (Rated: 18+) I Second That Emotion  A place to house the "mirror blog" series. There are 28 entries in two folders. by Nada

Did I say might? HAH! I have a few bones to pick, and I really couldn't think of anyplace else to do it. See, I told you I am not Mary Sunshine.

1. I want to know how big stores can be allowed to NOT have at least one public restroom. At the moment I am thinking of two stores in particular, these are stores who would want me to part with my money there. They simply can't expect people to want to come there, meander through the merchandise, maybe even go into a dressing room and try something on and not need to use a restroom. They encourage you to browse, to spend time, but gawd...I'm a water drinking woman, trying to stay healthy enough to go shopping. My generation were taught not to expect instant gratification, but I can only hold it for so long. H-E-L-L-O corporate headquarters...if you want the few dollars I have left after buying gas, driving 45 minutes to get to your store, try on clothing, stand in lines (because you don't want to pay for more cashiers) then open the damn, "for salespeople only" doors. and let me use the bathroom! I did NOT spend any money there, because I had to go find somewhere that has a customer friendly atmosphere. Guess where I went? To a restaurant. Did I come back, NO.

2. Thank you WDC for the WDC refrigerator magnet and birthday card. I don't want to seem ungrateful but...according to my checkbook I have spent more money on your site, this year, than I have spent on shoes. MOI...the shoe queen. My choice...but for goodness sakes, I do not want to stick a magnet on my refrigerator, unless maybe it is studded with emeralds or something. The card was nice. But don't I get a coffee mug yet? Something I might actually use. I liked the post-it's you sent one Christmas... or the pencils, except if I used paper and pencils I wouldn't be here now would I? I also use a MAC, which has built in post-its, for future reference.

3. I would like to take another exception with clothing stores. Since when did it become the "norm" to sell two-piece bathing suits as separates? I really hadn't noticed much of it in the past couple of years because there was no way I was going to buy a bathing suit, much less wear one. But now I'm going to the gym and am thinking ahead to December's cruise. I spent an hour trying to find a top and bottom in something besides an XXS or even an XS...I am a mature woman, I want a one-piece, or one of those two piece suits that is modest enough to cover my stomach and some of my butt! This Pamela Anderson-fake-booby-craze American women have bought into has ruined the last vestiges of bathing suit shopping for we "modest of boob sizes". Look, I'm the last one to put down a boob-job...but mine are from 31 years ago...when anything over a handful was wasted, and a woman could walk upright. Okay, I see that online shopping is how I'll have to go, just like for bras, and shoes under a size 6.

I probably could think of a few more, but I'm done for today. I have gotten to keep the few extra dollars I had, so for that I should be grateful.



 

Gee, I thought I had not blogged in awhile. Okay, so it just felt like I had not, since the last entry was so...um...minimal.

Oh well, I've been writing every day, still doing the gym, and reading blogs. I just have not much left to say.

Lance's brother and his wife, took us out to dinner in Santa Barbara last night. It was another birthday celebration for him. We went to the same restaurant that Lance and I went to for our anniversary. This time we did not indulge in the eight course chef's menu, but the food we did order was delicious.

Christine was just told the day before that she has to cut our all glucose in her diet, as she has some digestive disease. (Yet another reason to have a colonoscopy when your doctor says to.) I was absolutely astounded at the list of things she cannot eat now, who knew mustard was on the list? Anyway, she can eat potatoes (thus Vodka is okay, lol) and grilled meat, just no sauces, veggies and fruit.

I had a wonderful fresh beet salad with pistachios and I forget what else (heh-heh the Vodka I suspect), and three of us had fresh abalone. It was delicious. The dessert menu had a fancy S'more....of course I had to try it. It was a graham, coconut crust filled with a chocolate creme flavored with orange, topped with fresh marshmallow creme and drizzled with caramel. Good, but only reminiscent of a real S'more. Hubby loved his.

Here is a pic of Scott, Christine and I at the restaurant. Hubby took the picture and since ya'll saw him in the last blog.....

What a momentous weekend I've had. First, on Saturday, I celebrated, uh...more like acknowledged in my head, that I have been on WDC four years. Whew, the things I have seen.

Secondly, Hubby had a birthday Sunday. Yep, we are now in that delicious three-week period of time every year where I am only two years older than Hubby! Saturday night we celebrated his birthday by having a couple join us for dinner in Ventura. Toni and Dana have been dating a couple of years. Toni, Hubby has known since fourth grade!

Dana writes for a big newspaper....well, not that any newspapers are big anymore, witness the layoffs. Anyway, he is still employed, though for how much longer nobody knows. It was fun for me to talk about writing to someone who does it for a living. We had a good dinner and I managed to get half wasted on one drink. Gawd, I've become such a lightweight!

I thought I'd show you a picture of Lance (hubby) and Toni.


I would show you ours, but in my overzealousness at discovering how to "touchup" a photo, I made Hubby look like a blob. I thought I was practicing on a photo we were not thrilled with.

This July has been abnormally cool, fog in the mornings even! However, I had a splitting headache Saturday morning, so figuring it was tension related I decided to go go down to the gym for the fourth time this week! I always feel better after I work out...well except on Friday, when it was a weigh and measure day. I gained another pound...I know, muscle weighs more than fat. I'll be kicking some butt soon then. Anyway I worked out and then came home deciding to take a swim with Hubby. Wahoo...the water was warm. It was my first swim of the season, and I know I'll be doing more of it.

Well, I'm spending most of my time writing, which will explain my sporadic visits to the blogs. Don't worry, when I do catch up, I tend to make up for my absence, by reading the missed blogs.

I continue to appreciate your encouragement on the series. It's scary putting your life out here, but the comments have all been so positive, it lets me know my book is on the right track. Thank you.

I also want to thank you all for making the forum for Scarlett such a success. I know she is very touched, as am I. What a great group you all are.

I'll be back when I have more to say...