Entry #655508, added on 06-21-09 @ 6:44 am EDT
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Title: Dad’s Day
Date: June 21, 2009, Sunday
Thought: I did not have a clue what it meant to be a dad. I stumbled through it for the first dozen years.
Jog: Today is my day—Father’s Day. It has always been a very passive celebration in our family. Sometime during the day I will receive a couple of phone calls from my sons, wishing me a happy Father’s Day. I expect nothing more and to tell the truth the recognition by those two phone calls is plenty; in fact, it speaks volumes.
Our family has never been inclined to give gifts on these special days. The most we will do is to take the honored person out to eat, especially the mom’s. I don’t know why we have been so subdued in our demonstrations. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that finances were always so tight when we were younger—during the time traditions were established. It just never became a tradition. Even birthdays pass with moderate acknowledgement.
I’ve come to understand that the importance of these special days lays not in the value of the gift that is purchased, but in the sincerity of the recognition of the event. Linda and I have been married for forty-two years this coming August. There is no gift that can be purchased that will equal the accomplishment of her putting up with me for all those years. I will do something special for our 50th anniversary, after all simply to live that long is an accomplishment, much less to spend all that time with one person.
I’ve been a father for forty-one years, come October. I have not always done the best job. I was just a young man of twenty years when I had my first son—just a kid. To say the least, I did not have a clue what it meant to be a dad. I stumbled through it for the first dozen years. Unfortunately, those were the formative years in the lives of our young boys. Fortunately, I seemed to have stumbled in the right direction. Possibly that was due to the example left to me by my own father. I just did the things he did. It seemed to work; both my sons are fine men, of which I am very proud.
That brings me to my dad. It is strange indeed that after all this time, I have become more attached to my father. Dad died almost thirty years ago. For some reason I miss him more today than I did back then. I wonder why that is? When I was just a young man, my father was my hero. He was bigger than life and was the foundation upon which I built my image of what a dad should be. As I grew older, I realized that he was not perfect—not in many ways. I was not disillusioned nor disappointed in him; but I was somewhat sad that the image of my dad, which I formed in my youth, was flawed in places. My intellect told me that was only natural. None of us will forever be able to stand to the scrutiny and high standard of an adoring child.
So, today, I remember my dad and recognize that we both have a special day today, as do both of my sons. We belong to a vast fraternity of men. Today is our special day. One, which in most cases, will be observed simply. I suppose the thing that makes this so important is the responsibility we dads have to our children. It is a simple responsibility,requiring only that we love them and care for them, as we are able. If we do it with sincerity, we can make some mistakes along the way and everything will still turn out OK.
As Linda and I ate out last night at our favorite Italian restaurant, I witnesses a short glimpse of what this day means. A family was leaving the restaraunt, having finished their meal. As they passed by the tables, a man led his daughter of about five by the hand. I saw her look up at him with adoring eyes and simply say, “Daddy, look at this.” Now, it wasn’t what she said that impressed me. What I was struck with was how small she was beside him, how he held her small hand in his own, how she looked up to him, and how the simple little question was filled with a desire to please and a hope of approval. I’m sure she was rewarded with a smile and a comment. That’s what it means to be a dad, seizing the small almost hidden opportunities to make them happy, to make them feel secure, to make them feel loved.
Happy Dad’s Day to all you guys out there who find yourselves in that position. I hope you will have a very good day. I’m gonna just lay around and take it easy and wait for my two phone calls.
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