Entry #680038, added on 12-15-09 @ 10:32 pm EST
Entry Access Restriction: None.
Not to belabor the point, but on seeing their website yet again updated, I again have to ask--honestly, what is the point in e-mailing somebody, e-mailing them again several years later to say you didn't hear back from them before but you'd sure like to hear back now and get to know them, replying to their reply to assure them that you really mean it and can't wait to start corresponding, then apparently forgetting about this or changing your mind and deciding not to bother replying at all? Seriously? Why do people keep deciding to do this to me? (As mentioned in my restricted entry, I didn't even have enough fingers to count how many times this has happened to me. How many people out there find it amusing to get in touch with me and make me think they're honestly interested when they're not, or else whose attention spans are about as big as a gnat's, and whose consciences, in admitting to me that they're no longer interested, apparently don't exist.)
I already know I'm boring. I'm the first person to admit it, as these people could attest if they'd bother staying interested for more than one minute. I really do not need a bunch of people e-mailing me assuring me I'm not, then quickly proving that I am. Anyone else who e-mails me in the future to tell me they aren't really into my work or my interests but gee, they'd sure LOVE to get to know me, can expect no answer from me ever again. No matter how sincere they seem. ESPECIALLY NOT if they seem sincere--the sincere-seeming ones are the ones who disappear fastest. I don't have the time, energy, or self-confidence for this. Enough. This is the end of it.
If you want to get to know me, really know me, then read my f**king writing first (THAT'S where you'll find my heart, my passion, the "real" me), show me you MEAN it; don't e-mail me insisting you want to get to really know me if you really don't. I'm sick and tired of these people, which seems to be just about everybody. I don't seek them out and bother them. I really don't understand why they seek me out and bother me. Find something better to do with your time, because I'm not falling for it anymore.
And it's this attitude of mine that gets such people thinking, gee, what a bitch she is, sure glad I decided not to keep writing to her. Like it's my fault for being pissed off. Fitting.
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