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I believe the title says it all. |
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I curse and drink with the best of them. I'm blunt and honest and if you think that might offend you, too bad; don't read my entry. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** For those of you who are brave enough to continue: Thanks for stopping! Molly Jean   |
| I'm sleeping a bit better. We went to Goodguys and had a great time. Saw a few Cougars there, Rolla has a 77 (?) that he's restoring so it was neat to see the cars and hear his ideas for it. Sunday I had the family reunion, I spent the entire day in my swim suit fishing. It was seriously fantastic. I caught probably close to 50 fish, from cats to monster bluegills and a few crappie. Got to catch up with my family and hang out with my brothers. Been having a bit of a run around with my health, mainly my mental. My therapist is convinced I'm ADD/HD but my medical Dr. is thinking I'm Bipolar type2. It's basically the same thing only not such severe swings. He gave me meds for it but I haven't gotten them filled yet. I talked to Dr. Wagner about it and he said he'd call and talk to Dr. Passias and see if they can't come to a combine conclusion on what to do about all of this. Still waiting to hear back from Rolla on the Detroit trip. |
| I'm still not sleeping, and that combined with my PMS is making it very hard for me to have ambition for anything. Having lunch with my boss today and then updating router firmware at a few stores. Went fishing with Rolla and Connor and the girls on Sunday. We had a really good time. Rolla hooked on to a 5-7 lb catfish and we got it to the bank but the line broke as we tried to get it landed. We all got to see it though. Were going to Goodguys on Saturday. I brought up going the Henry Ford Museum before Connor has to go back to school and are making plans for that. I have to get up and start doing things. Seriously don't want to though. This has to end. |
| I'm still not sleeping, and that combined with my PMS is making it very hard for me to have ambition for anything. Having lunch with my boss today and then updating router firmware at a few stores. Went fishing with Rolla and Connor and the girls on Sunday. We had a really good time. Rolla hooked on to a 5-7 lb catfish and we got it to the bank but the line broke as we tried to get it landed. We all got to see it though. Were going to Goodguys on Saturday. I brought up going the Henry Ford Museum before Connor has to go back to school and are making plans for that. I have to get up and start doing things. Seriously don't want to though. This has to end. |
| For those of you familiar with my little slice of Ohio, tonight is Red, White and Boom; "THE LARGESET FIREWORKS DISPLAY IN THE MIDWEST!!!" {{e:oooooooooaaaaahhhhhhhhh} Let me tell you what a joke this thing is. Not only is it televised, so you can watch it at home on your huge effing TV with your surround sound, you can miss all the crack heads and rude people that congregate for this 1/2 festival of excess. I'm not sure how much money comes in from this, but it's seriously not worth dealing with the people and the traffic. Maybe 10 years ago, I wouldn't have minded, but people have become so inconsiderate that I just can't bare to deal with them en mass. I can't wake up today. I've tried, tried so hard to and it's just not happening. I have bike night tomorrow with Jordy and Steve again, we'll see how that goes with all the traffic from the holiday. We're having a cook out and that's about it. And that's about all I have to say today. |
| Arlene didn't make it. Her boss wanted her to work at 7am on Saturday and he was paying her double time, so I told her not to worry and to take the hours. She is hoping to be up this weekend, and I hope she is. Last week was just, .................... bleh.... I was in the office only one day. I was planning on being in on Thursday but I got a frantic call from my sister in law about watching her youngest son (14) because of a family death and while we had fun while we were running around, he spent the rest of the day connected to my WIFI and facetiming with his "soon to be" girlfriend. How can you know she's your "soon to be" girlfriend, and he's saying this to her face. I'm seriously looking at him like he's got a 2nd head. If you are telling her that she's your "soon to be" girlfriend and she's agreeing with you doesn't this mean that she's your GIRLFRIEND? What in this day and age constitutes it being a legitimate "going out" status? The eff...seriously. {e:justreallyhavenoideawhatfacetomake} So now, we're on a short week. I'm still exhausted. My week was just, eh, and then kinda crap. I finally got to a medical dr. on Thursday after years of not going to one. He seems pretty with it, and cool. He has a sense of humor, which is good for me because I'm a huge smart ass. {e:don'tlookatmelikeyoudidn'tknow} I have an irregular heart beat. For years I've felt this odd closing of my throat occasionally, like my heart was skipping a beat and thought it was weird. I've talked to Dr's about it before and they've written it off as just being one of those things. Turns out that the pacing part of my heart, the upper part, is giving this slight pre beat before the actual beat, and it's kinda throws the system off. He asked if I felt it during the EKG they did, and I didn't, but he said it's evident. He also ordered blood work for me and to test for diabetes. I still have to go in and do that. There's a lot of mental preparation involved in me dealing with needles, so I'm working on it. Oh, and they want to give me a vitamin D shot and a tetanus. Had another therapy appointment on Friday and I just couldn't stop crying. It was seriously embarrassing, we weren't even talking about anything that should have made me cry, still, I sat there and sobbed and carried on like the world was ending. He brought up the fact that he thinks I might be ADHD, and asked if I had ever been diagnosed, which I haven't. When I was a kid that was just something that was just an idea to most Dr's. He gave me a test and said I scored the majority toward the ADHD side. He gave me homework to research it and decide on my own if I thought he was right, talk to my mom, see what she thought. Mom said she took me to the Dr when I was little and brought it up that she thought it just wasn't normal that she had a child that wouldn't sit still. He told her that she should just feel lucky that she had a child that was healthy and active, she said it made her feel terrible, however it confirms my therapists belief. He also said that depression is a really prevalent thing in people with ADD/ADHD, text book, and would explain why I've suffered with it for so long. Saturday I was trying to put my new caliper on, decided to do it myself and not bother Rolla with it. I spent, at the minimum, an hour trying to get the bracket bolts to come loose. I was beyond frustrated and texted him to see what he said about having to replace it. The pictures wouldn't go through and I was in near tears, so I just put it all back together and said, Eff it, I'll wait until I have someone with more muscle. Then went in a fixed him dinner and showered and cried. I managed to get my shit together before I headed over and we had dinner together. He has water in his apartment and a working toilet! I was so happy. We did some running around and then went to a surprise party for a friend of his. We had a good night, didn't get back to his place until 3:30, and then that damn alarm clock of his went off at 6. I didn't sleep at all, it was effing cold and I felt so bad because I kept getting closer to him and he kept pushing me off because he was hot. I always have fun with him though, so...I don't know. Still unsure about how he feels about all of it. We talked about my Dr appointment and what went on there, and then got side tracked with talking about Connor and his heart issues. It was the first time I've seen him get sad or choked up about anything and it was hard. I don't deal with situations like that very well, I don't know what to say or what to do, so I just held his had and listened. I hope that was right. He hasn't tried to have me take my stuff back yet, so I hope it was. I was getting ready to tell him about my therapist thinking I was ADHD, but now I'm not so sure I want to. I haven't told him I've seen a therapist at all, and kinda the reason I did start seeing a therapist was because I was so frustrated with how emotionally unattached I've been for the past year or so and I didn't feel like I was being fair to Rolla. He's very non judgmental, and I really like that, but at the same time it's not something I really want him to know about yet? It's weird. Maybe it'll come up or something, I'll have to decide about it then. |
| I slept through my alarm this morning. I woke up around 4am and couldn't get back to sleep. I tried to read, I tried watching TV, nothing worked except falling asleep right before my alarm went off. I'm exhausted, and I have to set up hard drives today and probably the rest of the week. We took the kids swimming over the weekend, my aunt and uncle got their pool open. Rolla and Connor came too, then we went and got frozen yogurt. I put new brakes on my Xterra. I have a lazy caliper and I'll have that replaced this week I hope. I asked Rolla to help and hopefully we won't hate each other by the end of it. So tired, I don't have much else to say. Oh, Arlene is coming back on Friday so it's a Honey Badger Day! |
| Between IE updates and the new RQ4 update that came through two nights ago, all I've done is update computers. I got zero sleep because of a later afternoon coffee that didn't strike me as a bad idea until I was laying in bed at 4am wide awake. I had planned on riding my bike to work today, but that's not happening. I'm going to stay home and try to catch a few naps. The guys came over yesterday and tried to get that cable installed, failed. Just not going to happen. I'm going to have to spend the money on the wireless adapter, or just deal with it not having internet access. I'm good either way. Mowed the lawn, and finished up some work. Texted with Lori for a bit before bed and heard from Rolla. I'm going to one of Connor's baseball games tonight, after that it's $2 margarita night at Grapevine for my uncles birthday. I'm really exhausted. Oh! I forgot my therapy appointment was Monday and not Tuesday so I sat in the waiting room for ever thinking he was just really behind before I realized I'd gotten my days wrong. Okay, coffee and breakfast...that should help, right? |
| Friday was new laptop day. What do you get when you complain about how slow yours is, and you work in IT!? You get a new one! Yay! Been setting that up and trying to make the switch. Do you have any idea what a pain in the ass that is? Making sure all my documents, my cheat sheets, my templates are transferred. That everything is still in the same place. I'm effing lost if it's not. I'm so a creature of habit. The birthday party went well. Emily stayed the night Friday night and we took her shopping after a dinner of her choice, Max & Erma's. I bought her this adorable little shorts jumper that was Hello Kitty. That night around 9 or so I went out to see The Signal and to visit with Jordy and his dad. The Signal is Steve's band and they play a ton of classic rock but bring Jordan in for the more modern stuff. It's been a while since we've hung out so I was glad to go. Lori finally showed up around 9:45 and was grateful for the beer I had waiting on her. Jordy finally got a new bike an SV1000, went for a ride on the back of it, and it'll set your hair on fire. It's quick, nimble too. I don't think I was a 1000 but I'm definitely ready to move up my bike. The 500 is just enough to keep my happy, but I can feel my throtle hand itching for more. Saturday we got set up for the party and then had a full house. Jordy's band (3 Cat Day) was playing out at the lake, so I rode out and my aunt and uncle and also my mother joined me later. I'm going to go to bike night with them in Pataskala on Thursday. Steve wants to take my bike out to see how it handles and the seating position on it. It's nice, not all raked out like the SV, but just enough lean forward that you can drop to the tank if you really want to get at it. All in all it was a pretty good weekend. Didn't hear from Rolla for 2 days, only heard back when I wished him a Happy Father's Day on Sunday and that was just a few quick texts and a promise that I was going to get to fix him that dinner soon. Dealing with incompetence today is just not on my agenda but I've had a butt load of it already. Off to head home and have Scotty install my ethernet cable for the BluRay. It's good having bosses that know what they are doing.  |
| Trying to work up the ambition to start my P90X again. I was losing serious weight and was in great shape when I was doing it. I think I just need a partner. I was doing it every night with Jackie after work, I also wasn't eating at the time because of everything I was going through with Grant. I'm sure I'd get similar results now that I'm a healthy eater. My day is going to be wrecked though because Breakfast Club is on. I'm also working from home so ..... yeah.... Trying to put my ass back where it should be. Might take the dog to the dog park and I HAVE TO CLEAN. Emily and Maddy's birthday party is this weekend, like tomorrow. So I have to get my room together and make sure the bathroom is spotless. |
| We didn't do 1/2 price pizza. My Unkie Mike couldn't eat because of a procedure he had to have this morning, so we are on for next week. Mom and I did chinese takeout instead. I felt tired and pathetic all night so we didn't do much. I did my check book and texted with Rolla for a bit after he dropped Connor off. The big news yesterday was that they found a crocodile (or alligator, some kind of reptile like that) in the creek we usually fish in. I couldn't get a legitimate confirmation of it, but we had fun joking about that. That's about all I have for today. |
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We just ate dinner and now we're relaxing watching Whodunit? on TV. It's the only reality show I can tolerate. They get killed off one by one so it makes it extra fun 
