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Attack and Defend -- May Malevolence
Want to get your butt kicked? Mwahahahaha! |
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'Ropa Red Rover! Attack and Defend In&Out damaged in a counter-attack! Are play rules still in force? Red Rover? Red Rover! Can you hear me... "Prepare to meet your doom! This is Europa Frost and her minions, clones, buddies, soldiers, and slaves. I have conquered the Attack and Defend I&O! Next I will conquer WDC, and then the WORLD! Mwahahahahahaha!" ...and so the battle was engaged, the armies were equipped, alliances were formed... 'Ropa drew this picture... ![]() ![]() The wars dragged on for years, first one side then the other gaining the advantage. Then one day, on a fog-shrouded battlefield high in the mountains, the great warriors TSC The Ringmaster was angry. "We ain't makin' no money off you two! TSC Sadly, GrimReaper-WDC Angel Army And so 'Ropa But there was no fight in them, either. Everyone grew angry at the lack of action. Fight! Fight! Fight! they yelled. Someone threw a bottle, someone threw a chair, and then the room exploded into a free-for-all brawl... |
See, I'd love to get the joke, but I just don't know this Rush person. However, I suspect the Australian equivalent is a guy called Alan Jones, a certified bottom feeder with the sensitivity of a runaway truck. A quick Google confirms my suspicions. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) OK guys..2 days, 2 hours? I don't know .what to say, but I am putting this right back at the top of the list...every hour till I fall asleep (Alala And since there is no one else here...let me tell you that day after tomorow I am giving up living in a house. I have been housebound for too long. If the doctors can't cure me...duh....I will just give up the house!!! No joke. It is do or die (Alala But houses are convenient when it rains. Of course, if you live in Arizona I guess rain is not a problem. (Steve Ellen However, if you live in oregon, it rains so friggin' much, you're so used to the rain, you don't seen the need for a house. Being wet is normal. (Dad Hmm, I'm not sure that Alala has got this the right way round. Might it not be that the house is giving up her? Her house had become Alala-bound and needed to get away from her. At least, that's my story and I'm sticking to it! (bumblegrum (aka Grum) BREAKING NEWS....BREAKING NEWS (Alala ALALA actually got out of her bed and left everything behind///break ///is in a magical room while she prepares/// break/// to be very well equipped at camping. Tent... sleeping bag... water bottle... cook pot... knife, fork, spoon... anything else? (Steve Ellen FOOD!!!!!! Dammit, you forgot to bring food! (Dad I thought she was going to live off the land - you know, roast haunch of mouse, snails au gratin and shoo-fly pie. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Better known as starvation. Road kill! The highway hiker's serendipitous feast. (Steve Ellen It's not so serendipitous for the road kill. Most of them feel it is an impostion! (Dad 90% of roadkills are suicides. The other 10% were pushed. (Steve Ellen And 83.4081% of all statistics are made up on the spot. And 5 out of every 4 blondes have trouble with fractions.
(Dad Statistics are like bikinis. They are designed to cover everything vital and to reveal to the discerning eye much that requires further investigation. But they are liable to accentuate features that would be better concealed. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Bikinis are like jockstraps. It's only from certain viewpoints that you realize how revealing they are. (Steve Ellen I remember the 1st jockstrap I got. I was about 5;4" tall, weighed maybe 70 pounds. Told 'em I needed a large. They said, "Large? Are you kidding?" I said, "Hell no! I'm shit-kicking!" Didn't realize the size was the waist size! In the army the boxers they issued us were so wrong-sized and baggy that when we played handball (if you don't know the game it's on an indoor court and uses a small rubber ball) and used our boxers for gym shorts we had to turn them around backwards. (Steve Ellen WHAT, you played handball! Their are a million and one things you could do with a ball but you chose handball!!! wait a second, you wore boxers too. Just to much for me to process right now. (drew from sam's townn At the gym you could only play handball or squash and handball requires less equipment. It's a really fast-paced fun game. That little black rubber ball really zips around! (Steve Ellen I've played squash and I know the zip potential of little rubber balls (and the pain if you get hit by one at close quarters The only thing I know about squash is, when baked with a little butter and brown sugar, it's delicious! Brown sugar in baked squash? Sounds delicious. I'm not a great (edible) squash fan, so new ways to prepare it are always worth exploring. Thanks, Dad (be polite to the poor old guy for a change, Grum - it's not his fault Brown sugar + Baked squash = # 2 (drew from sam's townn Why do you spell town with two n's? I like winter squash. It's sweet enough for me without the added sugar. (Steve Ellen Didn't dfst usta have only 1 n in his name? When did he change? Or am I just being as observant as usual. In my defense, I did notice Mr. Z had 2 i's in his name immediately. (Dad Where at you have two D's. I myself have 3 T's but who's counting? (catty I have 4 E's. That beats everyone, I do believe. (Steve Ellen Let's see, two B's, two U's, 2 M's, an L, an E, a G and an R. No, nothing special there, except for the compelling, overwhelming, splendiforous personality of BUMBLEGRUM himself. All genuflect! (bumblegrum (aka Grum) If I could genuflect I would feel 20 years younger. Is it okay if I just nod my head in your direction and do a feeble hand wave? (Steve Ellen This is how I genuflect. *extends middle finger* (Dad what an experience. homeless intentionally...i have lots of writing material...must start blog! (Alala Do it! Alala, we sit spellbound awaiting your revelations. And, right back at yer, Dad I'll have you know I can make obscene gestures in 4, or maybe 5 languages! The eskimos have 30 different words for snow. Fleas only have two words in their language - wof and nawof. They mean dog and not dog. (Steve Ellen A fascinating deviation into the twin worlds of snow and fleas. But I'm still waiting for Alala's revelation of her intentionally homeless blog. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) If she is homeless she will only be able to post here when she walks past a Starbucks. (Steve Ellen So long as she walks past and doesn't go inside. If she does, she'll be under the pump from the guys on "What's Last Is First" Aren't we the guys from "What's Last Is First"? (Steve Ellen Aaaaahhhh, not all of us. (Dad True. You know the song "April in Paris"? Every time I see "April Aggression" I sing it with that tune. Thankfully it will be May tomorrow. (Steve Ellen May mayhem? May murder? May moonshine? May massacre? Lots of options for tomorrow. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) May marrauding. May manipulation. Mayday. don't really care for May mischief, which means Steve, in a perverse pique of "Gotcha, Dad," will probably choose that one. (Dad Thanks, guys, for eliminating 8 words for me. Hmmmm. May Malevolence. Not bad. And no "Gotcha, Dad," either. You're getting weak and wimpy in your old age, Steve. (Dad I am in a hotel room! The territorial inn in camp verde, steve, in case you miss me, I'll keep the light on. Life is strange. (Alala Camp Verde means Camp Green, right? Are there lots of trees? Can you hear the birds sing? Is life strange or are the people who live it strange? (Steve Ellen Yep, there is green in Arizona. It extense (get it extense ha ha hee hee) a few hundred feet from the Verde River (Alala It sounds very picturesque. When driving around Arizona I noticed hotels way off by themselves in the middle of nowhere. Is it one of those hotels? I like rivers that have carved their bed out of rock. Is that the way of the Verde River? (Steve Ellen I don't like beds of rock. Very lumpy mattresses. And way too hard. (Dad Hmm, yes. Never having driven around Arizona (or even through it) I'm not qualified to comment. I can tell you, though that beds carved by rivers out of swamp and mud are equally uncomfortable. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) I don't think we have to worry much about swamps in Arizona. There are many. Swamps are all we have in Florida, mind you. And you are right. Sleeping in the muc of a Florida Swamp invites all kinds of nasties like water moccassins to join you. (Dad In Aus, the equivalents would be brown snakes or red bellied black snakes. Neither are especially friendly, and the browns are absolutely lethal. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Water moccassins, Eastern Diamondback rattlers. We also have leaches, eels, all kinds of nasty creepy crawlers. I'll see your crocs and raise you a gator. (Dad And a nice selection of bugs including mosquitoes, black widow spiders, poisonous brown spiders, wasps, hornets, bees, stinging ants. I think I want to move to Canada. (Steve Ellen ....where they have ravenous wolves and man-eating bears. Good choice, Steve. Good choice. (Dad Woah, Dad! You've gone somewhat radioactive! ('Ropa New Zealand! That's where I want to move! Nothing there but sheep and Ropa. A very pleasant place to live. Didn't you mean: Arizona, that's where I want to move, nothing there but Alala and rattlesnakes, a very pleasant place to live THAT IS WHAT YOU MEANT, RIGHT? (Alala I've never seen a man-eating bear. Is that tasty? Do bear steaks often appear on US menus? Blue ringed octopus, stonefish, box jellyfish, taipans, redback spiders, funnel web spiders, great white sharks, tiger snakes - and big salties, up to 18 feet long. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Salties sound delicious. Yes, I meant Arizona with its unbearable heat and poisonous alkali ponds and bleached skulls lying around everywhere. Maybe I will have a tarantula for a pet. (Steve Ellen Got a thing for sheep, have you Steve? Reminds me of Tom Lehrer's line about the guy who practised animal husbandry - until they caught him at it. In case you didn't know, a saltie is a saltwater crocodile; you can eat them if you're really hungry! (bumblegrum (aka Grum) ...and they don't eat you first. (Alala Yes, mealtime with the Salties can be quite challenging. Who will get in the first bite? Who will be dessert? (Steve Ellen Would a saltie put chocolate syrup, whipped cream and a cherry on our thigh for dessert? (You'll notice how I refrained from saying anything about crushed nuts.) (Dad A saltie takes its prey in a death roll, turning over and over in the water until it drowns. Then it will stash it under a convenient log until it is nicely tenderised and ready to provide lunch. Charmin' fellas. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) I try to avoid eating meat that needs to be tenderized. I figure if God meant for me to eat it then it would be chewable without pounding it with a hammer or soaking it in a chemical bath. (Steve Ellen And the Queen shapeshifts into a reptilian in the shower. ie "blue bloods" Just ask David Icke or check it out on Youtube. And everyone knows everything on the internet is true. (Alala There is nothing that everyone knows. But at least everyone knows something. (Steve Ellen Even if it's just how to walk and chew gum at the same time. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Or how to talk and spew rum... or chalk and do sums! (Steve Ellen Ah sums, yes. "It's a favourite project of mine, a new value to pi to assign. I'd set it at 3, for it's simpler, you see, than 3.14159." (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Or the square root of negative 16. (Dad I have always been one of the fastest adders around. I do it at a subconscious level. I can add a column of figures so fast I am not even aware of how I do it. Often I get the right answer. (Steve Ellen And often the question is: Are you insane, Steve? Why that "Yes" just pops into your head every time, doesn't it? (catty There are definitions of "insane" that fit... and there are definitions of insane that don't. Mice! (bumblegrum (aka Grum) *check rating, sees it is 18+, decides against 1st answer* I thought mice popped out of her head. (Dad Mice pooped in cattys head? (Alala Sounds like a song title. Similar to "Stars Fell On Alabama"... ♪ Mice pooped in Catty's head while she lay dreaming in her bed... ♪ (Steve Ellen Hey! You're not a bad songwriter! A lousy song plagiarizer, but not a bad songwriter! (Dad Sounds more like "Dream A Little Dream Of Me", although why anybody should dream about mice pooping in catty's head completely baffles me. But, then, I'm easily baffled "I'm Easily Baffled" by Bumblegrum. ♪ Although some folks say I'm handsome and some folks say I'm smart, I'm easily baffled - who dropped that fart? ♪ (Steve Ellen Hmmmmmm. That looks original. I can't imagine anyone actually writing that. And if they actually did, I can't imagine anyone claiming in a court of law that they did. I think you're safe. (Dad I dread the day I have to admit I wrote something in a court of law. Nothing good can ever come from having to admit you did something in a court of law. I didn't do it, your honor! (Steve Ellen "Although some folks say I'm handsome but some folks say I'm dumb, I'm very easily baffled - I'm just old bumblegrum." Sounds better that way, and I'll cede the copyright to you, Steve. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Oh, take a co-writing credit, BBG. You can never tell. Some people might pay good money for it to NOT be performed. (Dad LOL. Your version IS better, Grum! And that's a sentence you will not hear me say often. A conjugated compliment, Steve? See why I love you so? (Alala I don't know why you folk are so against starting a sentence with a conjugation. It captures a natural way of speaking. "And that's the truth!" (Recall Lily Tomlin saying that?) "And that's the way it is." (Walter Cronkite) (Steve Ellen And I think Steve has a good point. That's how we speak. But have you ever read a direct transcription of an informal discussion? Makes you wonder what language we are really speaking. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) Or if we are speaking a civilized (OK, BBG, civilised) language at all. And, as you can see, you can begin a sentence with a conjunction other than and. And, it's possible to begin and end a sentence with the a conjunction (Dad Some Australians have a weird habit of ending a sentence with the "b" conjunction. "Yeah, she's a real grouse sheila; I wouldn't mind getting to know her better, but." This usually indicates some degree of uncertainty. (bumblegrum (aka Grum) In the sentence you gave it seems to be short for "but for that" but is it ever used without a referent phrase? For example: I would like to eat more pie, but. (Steve Ellen Oh yes. In your example, the referent phrase is implicit; "I would like to eat more pie, but I've already had a gutful and i couldn't squeeze in another skerrick." (bumblegrum (aka Grum) I would talk more about this fascinating topic, but. I agree, Steve. The topic seems to have run it's course, and. (Dad Total Displayed: 100 |