“Who the hell are you?” Mai ordered the man who had been watching her. She was a little freaked out about the whole fairy flying up her caboose and didn’t have the patience to deal with another love sick fan boy. Mai looked at the man, he looked normal enough, short black hair, normal street clothes, he wasn’t too ugly, but not that handsome ether. Mai would have to say that if circumstances were different, she would eat the guy on the spot just for fun. However, right now she only wanted to get back to her hotel room and rube some cream on her sore behind, it still stung a bit from the sudden fairy enema she’d gotten.

“My name, pretty lady, is Mir…er…Frank. Yes, I am Frank, not a soul being forced to travel to earth and play delivery boy to a bunch of upstart heavenly bodies because their too busy to make the trip. I’m certainly not a valiant warrior that fought an ancient evil hundreds of years ago, but gets no credit. No sir, I’m not that poor shmuck.” Mai listened to Frank rant with a raised eyebrow, were all the crazies coming out tonight? It seemed like she was destine to be visited by the weird and stupid, at least this guy was only the former.

“I’m certainly not the guy that has been complaining about not getting respect. Who’s been over looked by everyone and is just a foot note behind a high school priestess and her love sick puppy. While they get all the fame and admiration, the guy with the black hole in his hand is over looked. It isn’t fair I tell ya, it aint fair!”

“That’s nice crazy man, now if you excuse me, I got a date with a butt rub down,” Mai said hastily as she backed away. This guy was so nuts that he wasn’t even worth eating. If Mai tried to eat him she would probably catch his crazy.

“I mean come on, the freaken fox that turns into a balloon and throws tops gets more recognition then the guy I’m not,” Frank, who has stated clearly that he isn’t a certain perverted monk, stopped talking when he saw Mai start to get away. “Wait stop, there’s something I need to tell you!” Frank screamed, running up to Mai. Seeing the man coming towards her, Mai stood her ground.

“What?” Mai asked wearily. If he was wacko, she’d kick his ass with some of her impressive self-defense training. In other words, if he started to attack her, he was going to get a swift kick to the groin.

“I need to tell you something about the Pêche card. It’s one of a set of three advanced cards. Like the God cards, these cards have awesome power that only certain people can handle. You’ve been given the full moon card, Kaiba has the flipping the bird card and the final card will soon be delivered to the chosen one. You must guard that card with your life because when the time comes, it will be the key to defeating the great evil. So use it wisely and beware, the evil force will stop at nothing to get the card.” Frank sighed when he was finished. He had done his job and hopefully he could return back to heaven and all the gorgeous ladies that awaited him there. He just hopped Mai believed him.

“Thank you, you’ve given me a lot to think about,” Mai said slowly, not letting on if she really believed Frank or was just humoring him. Frank nodded and Mai turned to leave, at that moment, Frank noticed that Mai’s skirt had been ripped when the fairy flew up her rear. A big gash showed her soft, round rump, fully exposed. The sight of such divine backside, made Frank start to drool. He would not be able to live, er, unlive, with himself if he let up an opportunity to fondle such perfect ass. His fingers drew to the perfect flesh, but as he reached for it, the sky lit up and a bolt of lightening came crashing down on to Frank’s head. Mai was lost in thought and missed the loud boom and light show behind her. She wandered off to her hotel, leaving a charred undead monk on the city street.

“I get the picture, no groping the living,” he croaked and coughed up some soot. He decided to take a little nap before returning home and fell unconscious.