In a dark alleyway in Italy, two people meet wearing long trench coats. They give each other nods of acknowledgement as the only sign of welcome to each other. Actually, that is untrue, the woman nods as a greeting, and the man attempts to cop a feel and gets his hand slapped away.
“Come on Fujiko, let me have a small touch,” the man whined, holding his slapped hand as he nursed it from the hit.
“Lupin, you need to be serious. I didn’t invite you here so you could mess around,” the woman known as Fujiko Mine said testy. She was the notorious master thief that used her skills and body to manipulate and rob some of the world famousness treasures. She was named after Mt. Fuji, ether for her towering reputation as a thief or her towering bustline, no one knew.
“But messing around is so much more fun the business,” he stated with a lewd smile. The man was none other then Lupin the third, renowned thief and woman chaser. He was known to take on any challenge, no matter how impossible it may seem, just for the fun of it. He had been touring around Italy, trying to pick up some ladies by posing as a nude sculptor. Although, the fact he didn’t have anything to sculpt with made the women not too eager to pose for Lupin. After another day of failing to score, he had retired to his hotel and who should call him up, but his sexually explosive occasional colleague Fujiko. He had told him to meet him in an alleyway behind the hotel and he did; now he stands before the bombshell curious to what she had called him for.
“Lupin, how would you like to score a big one?” Lupin’s eyes widened and he started to undo his trench coat, when Fujiko rephrased the question.
“I meant, would you like to do a job with me?” She quickly said. Lupin molesting her would make their negotiations harder, so she was trying to defuse the sexual time bomb that was Lupin the Third.
“What kind of job?” Lupin asked suspiciously. Quite a few times, Fujiko had taken the loot they had earned from jobs and left him holding the bag. He had to be careful this wasn’t one of those times.
“It really is a simple heist. The museum is having a special exhibit called the Cats Eyes, which consist of two priceless gems surrounded by gold and rubies. It can easily go for six figures on the black market. The only problem is that the place is more heavily guarded then Fort Knox. My plan is to stash you away in the air conducts until closing, then you grab the Cats Eyes and we get away with millions.” Fujiko made it sound so easy, so Lupin know there was a catch.
“If all you need is for someone to wait around in the air conducts til closing, why not do it yourself?” Fujiko smiled nervously and Lupin knows he was about to hear the catch on this whole scheme.
“The air conducts are only five inches wide.” Lupin blinked once, then twice, he gave himself a look over and nodded when he calculated all the figures.
“So, do you plan on chopping me up to stuff me in the air conducts?” Asked Lupin, partly joking and partly serious. Why was it always the big-breasted ones that turned out to be psycho?
“Now here’s where my plan turns to genius,” Mai said pulling out a silver cigar case. She popped it open and two pills appeared, one red and the other blue. “If I give you this blue pill, you’ll shrink down to the size of my pinky and the red one turns you back. I plan to go into the museum as a tourist, with you tucked away. I’ll then plant you inside the air conducts until closing time when you get out grab the Cats eyes and get out through the garbage disposal.”
Lupin stood there dumbfounded, Fujiko wanted to shrink him down and steal something for her. He would absolutely, completely, with no question, refuse this job.
“Did I mention, I’ll be stashing you between my breasts?” Fujiko added.
“I’ll take the job!” Lupin shouted.