Nicole makes good on her promise: your death is definitely very, very gross. The snot you are stuck in only becomes thicker and heavier, seemingly crushing you. It eventually presses down on your chest, collapsing it, forcing you to draw breath. Then, Nicole’s liquid snot fills your throat and lungs, causing you to hack wildly. This will be your cause of death: drowning in the snot of your housemate’s left nostril.

The slime continues you press down on your corpse, squishing you into a strange sort of singularity, making you one with it. It was her nose’s equivalent of digestion, the snot squishing you into nothing more that a mere waste product. An hour after your death, the snot drains out of Nicole’s nostril as she blows it out in to a tissue. Your corpse, however, remains in its new form, stuck to the inside of her nose. You won’t be noticed until late that night when Nicole was in her pajamas; sleeping pants and a tank top, and working on conveying your demise to the rest of the world.

She hacked into your facebook account first. She changed your profile picture to a simple close up of her nose. She updated your status to read “Troy is excited to be the first boy turned into snot! And by such a hottie like Nicole too!” Nicole then updates her blog with the story of her afternoon and sends out a Twitter message to all her friends’ cell phones. “Troy made fun of my nose so I 8 him with it. LoL!” It’s when the replies and text messages start coming in and she has a few good laughs at your demise that she feels a small mass inside her nose. Alone in her dorm room, she picks it.

There you are on Nicole’s right index finger; a large, flesh colored booger, firm, sticky and gross. She lets out a nerdy giggle to herself before with an effeminate “ewww!” she flicks you off her finger and on to the white wall next to her desk. There you stick. Nicole has yet another good laugh at your expense and grabs a pencil. With an arrow drawn to the booger you’ve become, she writes your epitaph. “Stupid boy!” It reads. She then readies her camera phone. This, she thinks, will be the perfect facebook picture for you!