At that precise moment the door to the hall crashes open and six starving cheerleaders pile through. They are all utterly gorgeous, fairly drunk and make straight for you. You notice they’re also all taller than you - one of them looks well over six feet.

“Wow, he’s so small and cute” says a lovely black beauty, taking a swig from a bottle of Bud. That’s true – a lifetime spent hunched over video games means you’re not very big. She feels your arm. “There’s nothing to him!”

The six footer drapes an arm over your shoulders and hugs you close to her. You feel one of her breasts dangling over your head. “I think I’ll just gulp him down now” she breathes.

“OK, girls, let’s back off a bit, you’re alarming him” says Rebecca. “I need to explain a couple of things to Luke and then we can have the draw. Give me two and we’ll be through ” she says.

The girls retreat out of the hall.

"Where's your licence?" you ask. "This is a gas bill!"

"Can't find it" she says, her voice taking on an edge. "But let me tell you this, Luke - by the end of tonight you're going to be in someone's belly like it or not. Before you got here I gave them each a numbered card. Mt friends are going to tell you which of them is which number and I'll collect the numbers and put them in a box. You'll be blindfolded and you'll draw a number out. You'll be gulped down by whoever has that number. Now move!"