"Ladies and gentlemen, moles and non-moles!" A mole in a top hat and tails was standing up on the stage. He rapped a small silver-tipped cane on the floorboards in an attempt to get the audience's attention away from the dancing Sue Ellen, with the tapping increasing in ferocity with every minute, but it took a couple of splintered floorboards plus a bribe to the spotlight operator for Sue Ellen to be plunged into darkness and led off the floor.

Levi stood up anxiously. "Should we follow her?" she asked Roger. He shrugged.

"She'll be fine," he assured Levi. "We'll catch up with her later."

"Hmph," Levi said, uncertainly. She sat down and cradled her chin in her hands.

"LADIES and GENTLEMEN..." The mole in the top hat was clearly getting antsy. Finally the centre of attention, he waved the cane around shambolically and fairly screamed his opening lines.

"...MOLES and NON-MOLES! It's time for the HIGHLIGHT of our EVENING! Please WELCOME... the FAT LADY, who will be SINGING--"

A smaller brown mole scurried onstage and handed the Head Mole a small scrap of paper. Roger looked at Levi. "What's going on?" he mouthed.

The Head Mole suddenly commenced whacking the smaller mole around the head, who dashed offstage in a welter of squeaks and squawks. The Head Mole wiped his forehead with a pristine white handkerchief before tucking it back in his pocket.

"I'm afraid that there has been a slight blip in the show. The fat lady apparently lost fifty pounds overnight and now cannot qualify as fat." A tidal wave of moans rose up from the audience. "So we have sent out a runner in search of another fat lady to take the slim lady's place! In the meantime, please welcome Pete and the Molekids, singing their showbiz song..."

Levi grabbed Roger's arm. "I can't take it anymore!"

"Hey, hey, calm down," he assured her. "They'll find another fat lady soon. I mean, what with the current levels of obesity in the developed world, it can't be that hard, can it?"