The book Kris chose was based on the friendly lettering on the spine, which simply might have indicated that the contents were written in such a manner that even a ch1ld could decipher the language written within.

The title also intrigued him, as did the subject. Kris had never felt like he had been given much respect in hi life. His mother didn't trust him with anything remotely harmful; his father treated him like a dumbass on a daily basis, and even in school, he had been taken for granted. Kris would always get asked for answers to homework, by the popular girls in his classes, and never got so much as a thank you in return. He would have said no, but it turns out Blondes with big boobs are very had to say no to.

After careful consideration, Kris grabbed a book. Kris opened the book and made a startled noise as the pages flipped by themselves. As the book glowed like a beacon. As streams of words and colors flowed up into a pattern. Kris managed to close the book, but now he had a spell thrumming away inside his head. He'd be able to cast it, unleashing a bit of its power every time he did so until it was finally gone.

In fact, the spell would cast itself if he sneezed. Or hiccupped. Or didn't watch what he was saying. The spell thrummed and strained inside his head, anxious for release. Like a sneeze that he was holding back. Kris made his way downstairs, expecting that at any moment it was going to slip its bonds and hit someone in his immediate vicinity.

"Kris?" said a familiar voice.

Kris looked up, and was shocked to be face to face with his girlfriend Mandy! "Are you okay?" Kris tried to shoo her away, like he was turning into The Hulk. "Something wrong.... Get away!" But before Mandy could heed Kris' warning, he sneezed and enveloped his girlfriend in the spell.

What was the spell?