The stories included here present a lifetime of various essays regarding my life with my mother and father. These stories specifically touch on the challenges of being their caregiver over many many long years. I find today, since they both have passed, that during my mother's life I did not write enough about the joyous wonderful person she was and the unblinking love and support and wonderful gifts she gave me as a human being. Those stories will come. These stories tell the the cathartic tale of the pain, guilt and compulsions that dominated the life and heart of a child who gave 2/3rds of her life as a physical and emotional caregiver to both her parents; who in doing so awoke at 38 to only just begin exploring what it means to live your own life and to discover what matters in life beyond their death.