Having been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, some urges to write come to me while "under the influence" of my own biochemicals. Sometimes I'm up. Sometimes I'm down. If you read much of my poetry, you may think I'm always down.
Can you tell when my moods shift? I never looked in my journaling for that, but I imagine it happens in some of my writing. It's out of my control, but I'm generally good about taking my meds. Mood shifts, my emotional viability, is not under my control. Life happens anyhow. I live the best I can, and I'm usually open to considering an adjustment--just give me time to calm down and quit panting like a wild animal in a "fright or flight" situation.
I was diagnosed as bipolar in my mid thirties, about 20 years ago. These writings come from experiences I've had or considered, and written about during those twenty years.