In 1994, when I wasn't busy as receptionist at McXXXXXXX Food Brokers, I'd type out stories (on a typewriter, even!) about the place and then circulate them among the "cool" people in the office.

The stories did not exactly shed a favorable light on the office, as I hated it there. Eventually I was fired for writing them -- but not before I'd written three of the analogy pieces, which incidentally became very popular and were in wide circulation at the time of my termination.

I just found the original typed stories in a box and thought I'd type them up here. I've left them in their raw, unedited condition. They are listed in the order I wrote them, and thus betray an increasing bitterness.

Oh, and as for McXXXXXXX Food Brokers? They went under a few years later.