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Writing.Com Time

Wednesday
May 30, 2012
7:25am EDT


By Online Authors
jonesc's Portfolio!

Registered Author
Offline or Private
Last Online: Private

Est. September 22, 2007
Doctor
I am a 32-year-old combat Veteran of the Armed Forces. I write to get things off my chest. I have one adult Leopard Gecko. I have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from the War and that lands me in the hospital psych ward periodically. My doctor is the best I could ever have. I am learning to play the guitar right now. I have a black Cordoba C5-CETBK acoustic-electric nylon string guitar and a Fender Mustang I amp. Very cool. I also write my own music.
Highlighted Items:

Promotion to Green Belt  [E]   73 Entries
This is about judo and its influence in my life.

Zum Teufel  [E]   6 Entries
This is a series of encounters with the Devil.

About Songwriting  [ASR]   6.1 KB
This is a short collection of comments and observations on writing my own music...

Ole Captain, Sir  [ASR]   2.3 KB
Lyrics to the first song I have written in 13 years...

Writing the Music  [ASR]   4.8 KB
Phoenix writes his first musical composition in 13 years...

Statistics with R  [ASR]   2.5 KB
Phoenix learns a new programming language for statistics...

When The Music Wouldn't Come...  [ASR]   3.9 KB
I was a prodigy...and then the music left me for 13 years.

The Gift of the Guitar  [ASR]   2.4 KB
This is where I am at with the guitar currently, and my thoughts on the subject...

Anxiety or Seizure?  [ASR]   4.4 KB
Phoenix has an odd experience and discusses it with his psychiatrist...

The Wait  [ASR]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about the wee morning hours...

The Cordoba and the Fender  [ASR]   2.9 KB
Phoenix's new guitar and amplifier arrive...

Adjusting to the Inside  [ASR]   11.4 KB
Phoenix spends some time in the psych ward again...

The Acoustic-Electric Guitar  [ASR]   3.5 KB
Phoenix takes the next step in his guitar education...

A Little Disorganized  [18+]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about being acutely mentally ill...

You'd Never Know  [ASR]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about existentialism.

Never Once  [18+]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about trying dope.

The Guitar  [ASR]   6.1 KB
Phoenix burns incense and plays his guitar as he thinks about many things...

Out of Time for the MCMI  [ASR]   4.0 KB
Phoenix has to give an assessment...but his last three participants have been no-shows...

Easter Eggs  [ASR]   4.2 KB
Phoenix shares Easter with his family, then dyes Easter eggs with his friend...

The List of Songs  [ASR]   0.9 KB
This is the list of songs that Phoenix can play as of 07 Apr 2012.

The Phone Call  [ASR]   6.2 KB
Phoenix knows who called his spouse, and he is worried...

Sometimes You Wish You Didn't Know  [ASR]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about the truth and its consequences...

To Do Lists  [ASR]   5.7 KB
Phoenix has too much to do in too little time at the end of the semester...

When Your Friend is the Patient  [ASR]   6.1 KB
Phoenix uses all of his clinical skills to assess his friend during a crisis...

The Photo  [ASR]   1.9 KB
Phoenix treasures a good photo of him and his guitar...

Symbolism  [ASR]   2.9 KB
Phoenix thinks about the symbolism of his guitar and all that it means to him...

Statements of Faith  [ASR]   9.9 KB
Phoenix struggles with what he really believes spiritually...

A Cold Dreary Day  [ASR]   17.0 KB
Phoenix relaxes on a cloudy day in late March...

Change of Plans  [ASR]   5.0 KB
Phoenix consults his professor about his thesis ideas...

To Know A Person  [ASR]   2.7 KB
Phoenix is challenged by the question of not being "in depth enough" about himself...

In Depth  [ASR]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about what it might mean to be in depth about something...

Callouses  [ASR]   7.2 KB
Phoenix reflects on the callouses in his life...

I Just Don't Feel Like It  [ASR]   5.3 KB
Phoenix leaves class and goes home to rest because his day just is not working out...

Today Was The Day  [ASR]   3.9 KB
Phoenix's new MacBook Air was to arrive today...

The Functional Pieces for the Mac  [ASR]   4.9 KB
Phoenix finds out more about his soon-to-be new computer...

Computer Upgrade With A Twist  [ASR]   4.1 KB
Phoenix decides to upgrade his PC...with a MacBook Air.

Chords  [ASR]   5.9 KB
Phoenix continues enjoying his guitar, despite everything else in life that is going on...

An Unconventional Day...Again  [ASR]   5.2 KB
Phoenix has a day out of the ordinary that he could not have expected...

"Duelin' Banjos"  [ASR]   4.8 KB
Phoenix sets goals for his guitar playing...

Learning to Play the Guitar  [ASR]   6.2 KB
Phoenix comes up with some tips for learning to play the guitar as he learns himself...

The Procedure  [ASR]   5.5 KB
Phoenix has his ECT treatment...

Duet  [ASR]   5.5 KB
Phoenix's friend asks him to help her learn to read music and to choose a song to play...

Persistence  [ASR]   5.3 KB
Phoenix finds that persistence, again, is paying off...

Thoughts  [ASR]   5.5 KB
Phoenix misunderstood his friend's opinion about him playing the guitar...

Another Sunday  [ASR]   4.6 KB
Phoenix has another rough Sunday...

The Second Day  [ASR]   7.2 KB
Phoenix practices his guitar after scoring an assessment for most of the day...

Ode To Joy  [ASR]   4.6 KB
Phoenix's guitar arrives...

How We Were  [18+]   7.4 KB
Phoenix's friend tells him a painful opinion about her thoughts on him learning guitar...

The Ibanez IJC30 3/4 Classical Guitar  [ASR]   2.7 KB
Phoenix anxiously awaits the arrival of his new guitar...

A New Hobby  [ASR]   3.8 KB
Phoenix contemplates getting a guitar and learning to play...

The New Same-Old, Same-Old...  [ASR]   3.6 KB
Phoenix eagerly awaits the fitting of his new ankle brace...

New Glasses  [ASR]   4.3 KB
Phoenix discovers just how much of the world he could not see...

Sunday Afternoon  [ASR]   6.0 KB
Phoenix Jones continues to wrestle with issues from the morning...

Sunday Morning  [ASR]   7.2 KB
Phoenix Jones agonizes over life on a Sunday morning...

What I Asked For?  [13+]   1.6 KB
This is a piece describing what I thought I wanted to know, but didn't.

Case Manager #3  [GC]   4.7 KB
My first experience of the next in a string of case managers...I can tell.

Case Manager #2  [GC]   5.3 KB
This is a piece describing how I feel about losing another case manager.

When Is It Goodbye?  [18+]   1.6 KB
This is a piece about the loss of friends.

Dear Me  [ASR]   2.1 KB
This is a letter to myself outlining and explaining my goals for 2012.

Electroconvulsive Therapy 2011-2012  [ASR]   10 Entries
This is a series of accounts detailing my daily activities as I went through ECT.

Stop. Breaking. All. The rules...  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem to tell you how I choose to feel about poetry.

The Treatments  [E]   0.9 KB
Life-saving treatments can come with mixed feelings.

I Do Not Want to Be God  [ASR]   1.3 KB
This is a poem about the illness I feel this morning.

Time  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about the toll time takes.

The Mental Patient's Guide  [18+]   15.2 KB
This is a satirical piece that I am doing from experience.

Phoenix  [E]   2.7 KB
This is a short story written for a contest based on a photo.

A Decrease in Medication  [18+]   2.2 KB
This poem explores a lot of confused feelings due to a decrease in medication.

Hand-Me-Downs...Your Answer to Prayer  [E]   2.3 KB
This is a poem about hand-me-down blue jeans...at age 31.

The Candle  [18+]   2.0 KB
This is a poem about the morning after I got out of the hospital.

Clinical  [18+]   0.8 KB
Just how I am feeling today...first snow of the season.

Staff Sergeant  [ASR]   1.5 KB
This is a work about a prayer offered to God.

Zum Teufel  [E]   6 Entries
This is a series of encounters with the Devil.

The iPod  [E]   8.3 KB
This is an essay on my observations and feelings about my new iPod.

The Rabbit Lady  [ASR]   9.8 KB
A Case of Mental Illness, Perhaps My Own...

Brutalized  [18+]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about people who self-harm because they were brutalized.

Tell Yourself You Are A Good Person  [13+]   1.4 KB
This is a poem about being a "good person".

A Conversation With The Devil Himself  [18+]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about a conversation with myself.

The Spider Can Start Over Again...  [13+]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about the Itsy Bitsy Spider.

Fountain Pens  [E]   2.3 KB
This is a poem about fountain pens.

At The End Of My Life  [18+]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about the end of my life.

It's Late...  [ASR]   1.4 KB
A poem about the death of my gecko.

Who Am I, That I Should Be Mindful of Me  [18+]   3.1 KB
This is an essay with some questions about my importance in the world.

Hear Me  [E]   0.2 KB
Short poem

What Must Be, But How?  [ASR]   0.5 KB
This poem is about a poor person's view of surgery.

Premonition  [13+]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about a premonition concerning freedom to search for information

Promotion to Green Belt  [E]   73 Entries
This is about judo and its influence in my life.

Promotion to Green Belt  [E]   8.8 KB
This is an essay about transition and growth in life through judo.

There Again  [18+]   1.2 KB
This is a short release of emotional upset due to PTSD.

Amendment  [18+]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about the details that were left out of one person's side of the story...

The Whispers  [18+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about the inner dialogue that goes on in my head.

A Syndrome Of Basement Living  [18+]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about processes I believe result from basement living.

Hope  [E]   1.3 KB
This is a poem about hope.

Apology  [18+]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about the effectiveness of apologies.

Obscurity  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about the painting I entered in the art show.

The Hand In The Mirror  [18+]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about the other side of the mirror.

Provoked  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about being provoked and having no recourse.

In The Silence Of My Mind  [18+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about the thoughts I had today.

Demanding Action  [ASR]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about the possible reasons for my demanding action.

 A Taste Of Politics  [E]   1.7 KB
This is a poem about my writing professor and a problem he needs to correct.

Living It Down  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about being afraid of trying new things.

A Day The Way It Ought To Be  [E]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about how a day in my life ought to be.

Crisis Point  [18+]   1.7 KB
This is a poem about a crisis point in my life.

Foolish Comments  [18+]   4.8 KB
This is an essay about foolish comments and the people who make them.

The Black Easter Egg  [18+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about a tradition that my friend and I have at Easter.

Sometimes I Wonder  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about wondering who I am.

Smile And Laugh  [E]   1.6 KB
This is a poem about a person who has a terminal illness.

Shiai  [E]   4.7 KB
This is an essay on my first judo tournament.

Those Reviews  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about the reviewing process of writing.

Dream  [GC]   1.6 KB
This is a poem about a dream I had.

Cop-Out  [18+]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about my anger at one of my contemporaries.

Behind  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about things that are behind.

The Day  [E]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about facing the day ahead.

Maybe It Was  [ASR]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about actions that may or may not have been foolish.

Something About Monday  [E]   2.5 KB
This is a poem about Mondays in my life.

Perhaps  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about what may cause depression.

Wealth  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about what true wealth is.

Scholarships  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about scholarships and how outrageous the applications can become.

Time In Grade  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about belt ranks in judo.

A Passion  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about all the things I love to do and have a passion for.

Missing Judo  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about missing judo.

The Most Powerful Adversary  [E]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about my first judo tournament.

Where The Red Meets The Grey  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about judo.

This Morning  [E]   1.3 KB
This is a poem about my thoughts on my last morning of Spring Break.

Overwhelmed  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about having too much to do in too little time.

Reversible Judogi  [E]   1.5 KB
This is a poem about my first reversible judogi.

Wreckage  [E]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about the "wreckage" that my life is in.

Grappling With Sadness  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about fighting depression.

Losing To Yourself  [E]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about losing to yourself out of fear.

New Computer  [E]   1.7 KB
This is a poem about my new computer.

Anticipation  [E]   1.5 KB
This is a poem about the anticipation of my first judo tournament.

The Perfect Gear  [E]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about preparing for a contest.

The Next Morning  [E]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about being sore after judo.

A Million Reasons Why Not  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about the excuses not to do what I do in judo.

Tournament Time  [E]   1.9 KB
This is a poem about entering a judo tournament.

Jungdo  [E]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about what jungdo means to me.

Sizing  [E]   1.8 KB
This is a poem about the difficulties of sizing a judogi.

Letting Go  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about selling my guns.

The Next Morning  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about the morning after judo class.

The Pain of Judo  [E]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about the pains I have related to judo.

Right Being  [E]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about my thoughts prior to judo class.

Why Judo?  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about why I choose to practice judo.

Winning  [E]   2.2 KB
This is a poem about winning in judo.

Tournament Woes  [E]   1.3 KB
This is a poem about my inability to enter a tournament.

Other Forms Of Greatness  [E]   1.7 KB
This is an essay about the opponent in judo.

Judo  [E]   4.7 KB
This is an essay about judo from my point of view.

Greatness  [E]   1.8 KB
This is a poem about how greatness can be in just getting up and trying again.

Master Park  [E]   1.1 KB
This is a poem about my judo sensei and his words.

Judogi  [E]   2.0 KB
This is a poem about sitting in my judogi waiting for judo class.

Light Bulb Explosion  [ASR]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about rejection and taking care of my geckos.

The Fence  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about indecision.

Band Just Started  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about mental exhaustion.

The Other  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about the other.

Melting/Freezing Prose  [ASR]   0.4 KB
This is a prose form of Melting By Day, Freezing At Night.

The Basics Of A Troubled Life  [ASR]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about the life of a troubled person.

Bad Day  [E]   1.7 KB
This is a poem about a bad day.

If My Work Were My Play...  [E]   1.6 KB
This is a poem about work being play.

Wednesday  [ASR]   1.3 KB
This is a poem about a Wednesday.

Monday Morning  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about a Monday morning.

Smells Of The Office  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about my home office.

Melting By Day, Freezing At Night  [ASR]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about looking back.

Home  [E]   0.3 KB
This is a poem about how I feel about home.

Judo Class  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about judo class.

The Garden  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about a very different garden.

Government  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about government.

Blind Kindness  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about one person making a difference.

Critic  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about being critical of yourself.

Thank God  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about forgetting to thank God.

Mental Health Help?  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about the attitude taken toward the mentally ill.

Deposed  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about a king who just doesn't get it.

A Gecko's Perspective on Life  [18+]   238 Entries
This is my blog from a gecko's viewpoint. I have four geckos in two terrariums.

Dear Me,  [E]   2.5 KB
This is a letter to myself describing my goals for the new year of 2008.

Fortunately...  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about how fortunate we are to have what we have and take for granted.

Fugitive  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem that began as an experiment with words.

A Tropical Home  [E]   1.8 KB
This is a poem about home from a golden gecko's perspective.

Night Writer  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about writing late at night because I can't sleep.

Blessing In Disguise  [ASR]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about my life.

Cricket Song  [E]   0.9 KB
This is a poem about my gecko terrarium and its inhabitants.

Switch It Up  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about the fact that not everyone is going to like you.

Success  [ASR]   0.9 KB
This is a poem that began as an experiment with words.

The Classroom  [E]   0.9 KB
This is a poem that started out as an experiment with words.

Ask The Artist  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about creativity and madness.

The Aftermath  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about lying.

Revival  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about reviving your soul.

Owning Up  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about confessing to a wrong and the stress associated with it.

Reference Rendering  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem to make you think about the words you use in writing.

No Way  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about whether or not God has forsaken you.

Factory  [E]   1.1 KB
This is a poem that started as an experiment with words.

Insufferable  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about those people who are all about themselves.

The Spider Crisis  [E]   1.5 KB
This is a short fictional exchange between two geckos.

The Will  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem that started out as an experiment. Hope it makes sense.

As With Yourself  [13+]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about choosing a path and how the choice is sometimes not your own.

Supplies For A Tropical Gecko Terrarium  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a short outline of the supplies I recommend for a tropical gecko terrarium.

Christmas Illness  [18+]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about depression at Christmas.

Fugitive  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about one of my geckos escaping.

The Waterfall Conversation  [E]   1.6 KB
This is a short fictional conversation between two geckos.

Personality  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about personality in poetry.

Experiment  [E]   0.3 KB
This is a poem that began as an experiment to challenge myself.

Christmas Eve  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about Christmas Eve here in Billings (2007).

Amnesty  [ASR]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about forgiving yourself.

Caring for Sven, Grimmy, Spence & Dagmar  [E]   4.7 KB
This is an outline of how to care for Golden Geckos and Madagascan Giant Day Geckos.

Written, Rewritten, and Revised  [E]   2.2 KB
This is a poem that I sketched out without a thesaurus and then revised.

Expendable  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem. Make of it what you wish.

A Gecko's Life  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about my geckos.

Temporary Blindness  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about dishonesty and its ill effects.

Just Right Poet  [E]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about poetry.

Real Poetry  [E]   0.2 KB
This is a poem about breaking the rules.

Couldn't Look At You  [ASR]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about a session with my doctor.

My Last Day Alive  [13+]   1.8 KB
This is a poem about the last day of my life (if it was).

Dead On The Line  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about trying to get help.

Suicide  [13+]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about thoughts of suicide.

Respect  [13+]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about being suicidal and respecting someone enough not to do it.

The Lie  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about lies.

Worthy  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about taking care of yourself.

Disorder  [ASR]   0.5 KB
This is a poem written for the Vets out there wondering about politics...

Former Victim  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about my past and what my future will be.

Friend  [E]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about what the word friend means to me.

A Pen's Perspective  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about life from a pen's point of view.

Standard of Soldiering  [13+]   0.2 KB
This is a poem in the works...

Something  [E]   0.4 KB
This is a poem.

Do Not Be Afraid  [E]   0.4 KB
This is a poem about judo and determination.

What Do You Write?  [E]   1.3 KB
This is a poem about my difficulty writing in the hospital.

Home  [E]   0.4 KB
This is a poem about the home I set up for my geckos.

Static  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about the confusing feelings that religion brings.

Mat Burn  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about judo.

Call Me Israel  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about faith and a journey through it.

Catch  [13+]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about my poetic life in general...

Where Is God Seated?  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about my confusion over the LDS scriptures as I am reading them.

Student  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about being a judo student.

A Ring  [E]   0.1 KB
This is a poem. Make of it what you wish.

Escaped  [E]   0.3 KB
This is a poem about losing valuable thoughts.

Creating A Crime  [GC]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about false accusations.

Today  [13+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about what we choose to do with today.

Heart Burn  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about pain.

Disarray  [ASR]   0.8 KB
This is a poem written out of desperation.

Tightrope  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about the confusion of religion.

Depression Hurts  [ASR]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about depression's effects.

Losing My Religion  [13+]   1.2 KB
This is a poem about my confusion concerning religion at the moment.

The Hard Road  [E]   2.0 KB
This is a short story created for the photo of the month for November.

Hope  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about hope.

Acquaintances  [E]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about my friends.

On The Outside  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem I wrote right after I got out of the hospital.

Help  [E]   0.6 KB
This is a poem about helping others.

Him  [E]   0.7 KB
This is a poem about my husband.

Psych Ward  [18+]   1.1 KB
This is about the last month of my life.

Sunday  [18+]   1.0 KB
This is a poem about a particularly difficult Sunday in my life.

About Them  [13+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about my time in the war.

Night  [18+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about what happens to me at night.

Prisoners  [13+]   0.8 KB
This is a poem about the human condition dedicated to my friend Ginnie.

Blind Eyes  [13+]   0.5 KB
This is a poem about pain.

Blank Pages  [18+]   1.0 KB
A poem about writing and suicide.

The Fix  [GC]   0.8 KB
This is my first published poem. Tell me what you think. It is in memory of a friend.