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Hi all; I hope you're doing well and having a great day. Well, we finally got Internet back at the house last weekend. Sorry it took me a while to get back here to update you. Actually, it's not that I've been extremely busy - quite the opposite, my schedule is finally freeing up and I've been taking things slower. And you know what? I've actually accomplished more in the past week WITHOUT STRUGGLE than I have in the past, oh, 10 months of frenzied activity.
Interesting, very interesting!
I think that a recent revelation finally helped me get into balance. Last weekend, it hit me out of the clear blue sky that I've been struggling so long and hard to wrap my head around so much and to push myself into adjusting to all of this change. But the fact is that joy, peace and contentment are things that you don't find by looking for them. They find you when you simply live and do things your best, and things that speak to your heart. The answer, it seems, isn't to force myself to adjust, but to simply live each and every day, doing the best I can and being true to myself, and the rest will follow.
I told a friend this Monday and she said, well yea, Sherri, that's exactly how it is.
As I realized this, I also realized I have a lot of things I need to let go of, from the pain of my grandparents' death 20+ years ago to my former workplace that I left 5 months ago. "Accumulated knowledge," as we call it at work, is ok. It helps us learn and grow. But a chip on your shoulder isn't. That's not cool at all - oh no, precious. There are things to keep and things to let the wind carry away.
I've let my life get too wrapped up in the drama of "have to's" and I risk losing some things I love if I don't reign it in and take back my authentic self. Yes, some of this change has meant that I had to change myself and my way of thinking, but deep down inside I'm still Sherri and I need to honor who God made me to be and and let the world see it again. I have in one way by entering NaNo. I love my writing and I'm so glad to have it back. I saw that the "busyness demon" was trying to take it away, and I aggressively fought it by writing that novel.
I need to make sure I have time each and every day to do something that speaks to me, be it writing, reading, getting back on the treadmill (which I have done this week), cross stitching, or whatever. My hobbies have been slipping away and I want them back. And I can have them back. There's no reason why I can't.
I've also been too hard on myself. Adjustment isn't something you can force. It happens by living one day at a time. And I'm going to do that now. I have to. It's the only way I'm going to succeed at getting my life back and taking control of it again. I will do my best and do what I love - things that I've always believed in and lived. This is true, no matter what else changes. I try to be a good steward of what I have.
So that's my revelation for the week. And with that, I'll be off.
Here's to living each and every day the best you can, and to the fullest!
Bye!
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