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I write, begin more things, but rarely finish anything. The few short stories I have finished, I can thank contests for. So the novels I've started -- well they sit dormant, sometimes for years, before I get back to them -- but even then I don't finish them -- not even the first drafts. I wonder why that is?
Let's see, all the reasons I don't finish things... hmmm good idea for an in-and-out.
1. It won't be good enough.
This isn't the classic perfectionist excuse but same result. Writing is one thing that doesn't come easily to me. That is the main reason I'm attracted to it - it's difficult for me. Not the ideas, not the desire -- but the technical aspects of writing. I'm not detailed oriented, so editing is almost impossible. For me knowledge has been my greatest tool in my success tool box. If I don't know how to do something, I dive into books, talking with people who do know how, anything I can get my hands on -- to learn what I need to know to be successful. But with writing -- I've tried that. I've read probably over 100 books, joined several review groups, read, read and read more. But I still don't know enough about structure, character developments, dialogue etc.
2. I don't write enough.
Because of item #1 above, I have the preconception that what I write won't be good enough, so I don't write enough. I know, on an intellectual level that actual writing is what will make me good (or at a minimum, at least make me better). I know, on an intellectual level, that everything else I've been good at as come at the cost of "practice", yet with writing, I don't give it its due. So my reluctance to put in the time, has to be more than just fear of it not being good enough. So dig deeper...
3. I might look foolish.
This fear has held me back in many areas. Comes from my mother drilling into me how "stupid" I was throughout my life. Again, on an intellectual level, I know I'm not stupid, and by most people have told me I'm pretty smart. If financial success is any benchmark of intelligence, than again I'm pretty smart. The possibility of putting myself out there as a writer, then having someone I know - who thinks I'm smart -- read it, and laugh - well, that would bother me. I guess I envision them reading my work and saying: She thinks she's a writer? She should have quit her day job (which I haven't but someday would like to).
4. I always use the excuse - I just don't have time.
Running two businesses, dealing with my OCD partner, trying to be a decent wife, friend, step-mom, etc... all take time. But when I'm honest with myself, it isn't that I don't have time -- it's that I don't give my writing any priority. It's always at the bottom of the list - if there is any time left over. Who ever has time leftover?
5. I don't feel well enough to write.
This has been a legitimate problem in the last three years, but I've been using the excuse for over 20 years. Yes, you'd think I'd be tired of hearing myself say it by now. However the funny part of this is I think writing is the one profession I can do -- EVEN THOUGH I'm sick. It's not very demanding physically, I set my own hours, and I'm doing something I love so the stress is significantly lower than what I do now. So more writing, would actually lead to feeling better - but instead I do less.
If I read these excuses from somebody's else blog, this is what I'd be thinking:
1) Get over yourself
2) Shut-up and Write
3) Who cares if its not good and it's probably better than you think.
4) If you really -- I'm mean - REALLY - want to write - you WILL.
5) If you're not writing enough now, it's because you are gaining something by playing the pity card - oh, poor pity me, I don't have time, I feel to sick, I'm swamped at work [insert any excuse here] to write -- boo hoo. Again, if you really want to write - you WILL make it a priority.
6) Best way to get over looking foolish - is to LOOK FOOLISH. It's not going to kill you, it won't hurt you, it could even be a great learning experience. But in the end, it probably won't be nearly as bad as you're making it out to be.
7) Don't feel well? Come on. Think about the published author Christy Brown who is a spastic quadriplegic born to a large, poor Irish family. The only limb he can move is his LEFT FOOT (hence the movie based on him called "My Left Foot" ). He had nothing, physically, financially -- nothing but his brain -- and he's published. Now, what's your excuse?
Well, that about covers it. As you can see, I don't take to excuses from other people, so why should I tolerate them in myself.
Having looked at my excuses and then viewed them as if they were someone else's, and asking how I would I respond to someone else's whining (the way I did) -- well that was eye opening!!
Time to write...
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