Well folks, part of the riddle of my discouragement has been revealed. I am, indeed, sick. I'm pretty sure that these sinus aggrivations are a cold. That explains my crankiness because I always get irritable when I'm getting sick. And yes, I know I should stay home but guess how I got it? SOMEBODY came in to work sick a couple of weeks ago. Hrmph. Allergies my behind, she was sick and should have been at home instead of here touching the copier, FAX machine, doorknobs, and everything else in creation. Now my programs are picking up and I need to be here to make sure things keep moving on schedule. I have deadlines and a meeting coming up in a couple of weeks and timing is everything now. Oh well. If somebody else followed that advice to stay home when they're sick then I wouldn't be in this situation of having to work while I'm ill because I WOULDN'T BE SICK!

Doesn't it piss you off when you have to pay for other peoples' mistakes?

Ok, I promised not to be pitiful or spiteful in my last entry. I just had to let that bit of steam out before I spontaneously combusted. That wouldn't be good for anybody.

Anyway, I'm trying to figure out a way to balance things out in my life. That's going to be a challenge. October - December are usually my busiest times personally and professionally, and my calander is already starting to fill up. Take next week, for example. I have a dentist appointment on Monday, I have to drop my cross stitch off for judging at the State Fair on Wednesday, and I have a hair appointment on Thursday. Yes, I live by my calendar in the last quarter of the year. I often tell people that I'd love to do NaNoWriMo, but I'll never be able to do it while working full time. November is just too busy. If it were in January or February (or even March) I could pull it off, but not in November. So I wish those of you participating luck and positive inspiration and join you in spirit if not online. It's a real shame because I do have the inklings of a novel idea stirring in the old grey matter, but between a busy schedule and a writer's block that's keeping it from fully forming, well, let's hope it comes together in 2010.

One thing I really need to do is get a grip on my morning schedule. I'm stumbling in every day 5-10 minutes late. They don't care because many people do it, but that's no excuse. I need to get some self discipline and get up on time in the mornings. I've done better with planning my outfit and getting things together the night before, but I have a bad habit of lying in bed for 10-15 minutes after my alarm clock goes off. That needs to stop. Traffic around my house is very unpredictable because we live near an elementary school with a very poorly designed drop off and pick up area for students. Some days I fly right out there, and other days traffic is so backed up that I have to wait for somebody to let me out of my own driveway. It depends on whether the busses have gone by yet, and they don't pass at the same time every day. On a good day my commute is 20 minutes. On a bad day it can be 35-40 minutes. The folks living in that area have complained and complained to the school district and the county to do something to alleviate that traffic problem, but we keep getting told to suck it up. We're right outside the city limits so it's "not their problem." (Oh, but they're quick to claim us when TAXES are due!) I know I should wise up and plan for the worst case scenario every day. Now I'm afraid my tardiness is starting to rub off on Rick and he WILL get in trouble for being late to work if we don't both get a grip on this problem soon.

Well, I best be off. My break is over and I need to get back to work. I'm trying to get license renewal forms ready to send out in a couple of weeks. License renewals for 2010 - good grief! It's hard to believe I'm going into that time again. It seems I just got my databases and rosters updated for 2009 and now we're gearing up for another new year. I tell you, the saying is true. Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes!

Ok, this roll is spinning outta here. I hope you have a great day. I'm trying very hard not to let a bad morning cast a dark cloud over the whole day. Just because it started bad doesn't mean it has to stay bad. I keep telling myself that. But for the record, things have settled and it is going smoother now, so perhaps it's working.

Wishing you a wonderful Wednesday.

Bye!
 

Have you ever had a dark season of the soul? It's a time where nothing is actually WRONG, but you don't see any fruits for your efforts. You get discouraged because all of your hard work seems to dissipate into nothing.

That's where I'm at now. Truthfully, it's been going on for a while, but I've managed to distract myself by staying busy with other pursuits. The illusion finally fell apart on me this weekend when I completely broke down and confessed to Rick and Zack that spiritually, I feel like a broken egg - cracked and running all over the place.

For example, I've worked and worked on my writing to no avail. While I get great rates and reviews here at WDC (which I do appreciate so much), the rejections from my recent submission binge are already pouring in. All I seem to have heard for the past year is "thanks, but this isn't what we're looking for" or "thanks, but this doesn't fit our needs now" (even though I checked the criteria carefully and what I sent them met it just fine). I know many of us are in the same boat with this one. Not only is writing a rejection heavy business, but the slow economy means less opportunities than there used to be. I know everybody says to hang in there and I will, but I think we all get beat down by the rejections from time to time, and that's where I'm at.

I'm also discouraged with my job. Again, it's not that anything's wrong, but the whole thing about the agency move is completely out of my hands. There's nothing I can do and I have to wait on others to do their part bcause of "conflict of interest" issues. They fear I might look out more for improving my own situation and not take what's best for the programs into account. I think that says alot about some of the other people they obviously work with! It's frustrating, especially when you're a personality type that's used to taking things by the horns and dealing with them yourself. Now I'm being told "this or that might happen. I'll let you know," then left hanging. Rick says I should be glad that others are handling this because it's less stress on me. I know, have faith. I do. It's just frustrating to have your fate in the hands of people that only have a vague notion of the day to day reality of their actions and decisions.

I'm also tired. There's always so much going on. I'm tired of running around like a chicken with my head cut off. When did life get so busy? I don't understand it. I'm always rushing to pick this up, or take care of that. It's madness. I actually took this week off the treadmill because getting on it eats an hour out of my night (30 minutes to walk, then 30 minutes to cool down, clean up, shower, plan my outfit for the next day, etc). Time is turning into a precious comodity that I don't seem to have much of anymore. Good grief, how do you ladies with children do it? I know skipping excercise is cheating myself and I need to take care of my health. My sinuses started bothering me again last night so it seems it was for the best anyway. Then again, if I'm getting sick that might explain why I'm in such a crappy mood.

See what I mean? There's nothing really wrong, but it seems like I'm running in place. I work and work and get no results. After a while, that gets to you.

I suppose the real question is what I'm going to do about it. I don't want to become a pathetic whiner that bemoans their ill luck and runs off their friends. I don't want to go crazy and do stupid things that are self destructive. I don't want to curl up in a ball and give up. There's a delicate balance that I'm trying to keep.

The truth is that I've been through these seasons before, so I know they don't last. They seem endless, but something always happens to put things on the path of progress again. Unfortunately, the only thing you can really do is wait it out. That's the tough part. Human nature is to do whatever it takes to make it end, but there's nothing that will MAKE it end. It will end when the Lord is good and ready for it to end. So I have to find a way to ride this out with as little pain and misery as possible.

That doesn't mean I do nothing. I still work. I still keep things moving and keep trying. The point is to cast a wide net, knowing that eventually my efforts will catch something good. I just have to be patient and acknowledge that it might take a while for that catch to happen. As I said in Sunday School one day, sometimes I think I missed the ship when it came in, so now I'm waiting on the bus.

Nothing last forever. Life is a series of ups and downs and I'm in a spiritual rut right now. It's not the end of the world. It's natural. Frustrating as hell, but natural. I have to ride this out the best I can - keep working, keep trying, keeping the faith. Hope might not be burning bright on the horizon now, but the glow is still there. I have to be patient.

One glimmer is that I do have a writing idea floating around in my head. It's still in the very early stages and I know it won't be ready to actually write for a while, but I hope it will continue to come together while I'm on hiatus. I'd really like to write another novel, so maybe this will be it. Then again, is it worth it to put the time and effort into writing a novel if there's a good chance it won't get published? Doesn't matter. I'll write it anyway. Writing is a wildly unpredictable business and you never know when or what that hit will be. I don't want to give up. So I prepare to cast the net one more time ...

Don't worry, I won't fill this blog with patietic entries of my woes. I'll ride this out. If day to day life is what I've got, that's what I'll live. I am determined to make it through this dry season with grace and to come out with wisdom for the way. Well, at least make it through with more grace and wisdom than I've done in the past!

Here's hoping all's well in your corner of the world. Keep the faith.

Bye!

 

Greetings all, I hope you're having a fantastic Friday. First, let's start with the obvious: the University of South Carolina beat #5 Ole Miss last night 16-10. WHOO HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's nice to be the upset of the weekend. I know heads will be smoking at ESPN to work that out! They say they try to be fair, but it's explicitly clear that they don't like USC (the Gamecocks on the east coast, anyway). The other team is always super, thanks for asking. The Gamecocks could be playing the devil's minions and they'd not only speculate on how the demons could beat us, but tout Lucifer for the Hiesman. It's good to win and throw them in a tailspin!

Second, it's time to throw down a gautlet. I've been told a lot lately "Sherri, you are too polite and civilized. Throw people under the bus when they act stupid every now and then!" I believe the manners I was raised to have and the discresion I've learned over the years are seen as a liability. But to sooth them, here's one for you:

When you tell somebody one thing in a public area and tell me another story behind closed doors then I KNOW YOU ARE LYING. Mentioning that everybody in that room can hear every word that's said in there got a flinch and puzzled stare and I don't believe that lame story you gave me. Good grief, at least I limit my storytelling to my writing!

The devil is the father of lies, and every time you pull this stunt you're serving him. He's not a pleasant or trustworthy master. He'll drop you as soon as he finds somebody that serves him better than you do and there's always somebody better out there. I'd think you would have learned that lesson by now, but obviously not. Since the hard way is the only way you learn, so be it.

I know who's two faced. You know, I hoped we were done with that when The Queen left my humble domain, but I guess we should say hello to your new "special friend." It seems the crown is being passed on. I know who's lying. I know who you're schmoozing with. And though you deny it, you know that I'm not as stupid or naieve as you wish I were. Granddaddy always said that if you don't pay for it in this life, you'll pay for it in the next - back to the reaping and sowing concept. So if that's the way you want to be, fine. As Mom says, it's your soul. I leave it with the Lord. Don't cry when He sets it right. That's all I'll say about it.

So for all of you that think I've been too civilized in my dealings with certain others, there you have it. And now let's move on because I refuse to allow people like THAT to have any power over me. Now on to more pleasant things:

I'm thankful to be in a good place today. After working like crazy all week, I finally got everything settled and the weekend is free for me to do what I want. The house is clean, chores and errands are done, I got on the treadmill as scheduled this week, writing is all wrapped up and final submissions are mailed out, bills are paid, today is Rick's payday and overall things are in good order. Hooray! God willing, I plan to take it easy tonight and sand that table tomorrow. That is, if I can stay away from the lure of college football.

This is my problem on Saturday's in the fall. I plan to do all this stuff, then Rick turns on the TV and before I know it I'm sucked in a game. If I'm lucky, I'll get tired of sitting and wander away, but if it's a close game I'm usually stuck. That's my weakness. The SEC games are usually the best ones too. You'd think I'd wise up and realize that it's not a good idea to plan much on Saturdays from September - early December. It reminds me of something I heard on a commercial a few weeks ago. In the south, it's God, family, and football. *Sigh* That's true in so many cases.

In other random news, I'm happy to report that I have a writing idea! It's vague and by no means ready to write, but I hope that it will come together while I'm on hiatus and I can start writing it in 2010. Who knows? This one may shape up to be another novella or novel. I sure hope so. I love writing longer stories. They're so much fun!

Today is my brother's 40th birthday. I can't believe my big brother is 40. I don't think he can either!

Anyway, that's where it's at in my corner of the world. I hope you're doing well. Have a Happy Friday and a great weekend.

Bye!
 

Hi folks, I hope you're having a great Wednesday. First, I'd like to open by making good on some promises from last month. I promised you some pictures, and finally got out the digital camera and took them last night. First up is the framed dragon cross stitch:



Next up is a picture of the outside cat we started feeding in August. We thought her name was Violet, but I was informed that her name is actually Misty. I don't know why there was a misunderstanding. They asked if the cat was black and white. I said no. They said "oh, that's Violet." Then when they saw her they said "no, Violet is black and white. That's Misty." Well, I said she wasn't black and while. I wonder if people listen to me sometimes (let me quit talking and they beg me to start again, but that's another blog entry). Anyway, here's Misty. Sorry it's kind of far away, but this is as close as she'd let me get without bolting for the woods. Plus, I'm bad with a camera and can't figure out the zoom feature:

** #1601951 Not An Image **

And lest you wonder why she remains outside, there are two reasons. First, Rick is allergic to cats. Second is this this little fellow:



That's out parrot, Zack. It's been a while since I posted his picture. He's a sun conure - 9 years old and I'm pretty sure he's the happiest thing living on planet Earth right now. Which brings me to the topic of today's blog entry.

I was fixing to go to bed night before last when I found myself wondering something odd: Can I be happy without writing in my life? It's a strange question and yet, I ask it every time I put my writing on break. Obviously, I love writing. I want to become a better writer, see it do well, and get it published as much as possible. It's very much a part of who I am. But at times like now when the words aren't flowing, it makes me wonder if I'm pushing too big a part of myself aside in an effort to live a "normal" life.

Then again, the very question begs a definition of what's "normal." It would seem that my love of writing makes it a "normal" part of my life, so having to lay it aside (for writer's block or a crazy-busy life, or both) probably means that life without writing isn't "normal" at all in my world. So even though I say I'm taking time off to "just live" and have a "normal" life, the truth is that it's anything but "normal" by my own definition. There is a void I'm working around, and I need to make sure I'm not randomly filling it with busywork to keep it from sucking me under. I know, this can turn your brain inside out. But I felt compelled to address it because I need to work it out in my own mind.

So back to the basic question: Can I be happy without writing in my life? The answer is yes. It might not be the same kind of happiness I feel when I'm actively engaged in a writing project, but I can be happy. I'm taking this break to replenish my creativity, so it is serving my writing, albeit in an inactive fashon. I keep saying that life itself is a catalyst for creativity, so this break is giving me an opportunity to soak it all in. I think that my frequent blogging is a side effect of this - it's not only keeping me from falling into the void, but giving me a place to take notes on my life and experiences.

All in all, I'm a happy person. No life is perfect and I'll admit there are areas that could stand improvement, but on the whole I feel my life is the best it can possibly be. I feel I'm doing all I can with what I have to work with. I can't even begin to count my blessings because they're so abundant, and hope burns bright on the horizon. So yes, I'm happy.

That's all for today.

Bye!


 

Hi folks, I hope you're having a Terrific Tuesday. I'm slow going today, and I'm not sure why. I slept well last night and nothing is really burning on my mind. Who knows? Maybe it's a wierd convergence of the elements that has me dragging. Anyway, on to today's entry:

Are you the type of peson that has your whole life planned? I mean, do you plan to graduate school by a certain age, marry at a certain age, have a family at a certain age, retire at a certain age, etc? Personally, this has never worked for me. Everytime I set a goal to accomplish something by a certain age, it's never happened. No joke - I'm 34 years old and other than graduating high school and college on schedule, it's NEVER worked out for me. I guess it's God's way of reminding me of who's REALLY in control of my life and the timing of things in it. I learned by my early 20's to give myself a wide berth in meeting those life goals. I still make them, but I don't set a timetable on them. Otherwise I'd be mortally depressed because I hoped I'd be an established writer by my early 30's but obviously that hasn't happened. But I wander ...

I have known people that were very ridged about the timetable of their accomplishments. The amazing thing is that on the occasions that they missed the mark, they usually suffered a terrible amount of despair. That's natural, but the self imposed deadline they set on themselves made that sting a bit more painful. The ironic thing is that you'd think they'd learn the same lesson I did, right? Wrong! Instead, they reset the goal for another time a little further off. I'd think that after being knocked down, they'd learn some patience and grace - and to go easier on themselves.It didn't take me long to get it. I'm the world's worst case of a perfectionist, and I still learned to take it easy on myself and keep those sky high expectations in check. A lot of people say that perfectionists expect too much out of other people and the world. Few people realize it, but what you expect from others is a reflection of what you expect from yourself. But again, I wander ...

I guess the bottom line is having patience with yourself. It's fine to have goals, Heck, I think it's very important. Just keep in mind that reaching them is a journey of it's own, and there's no telling how long that journey will take. Your first novel may hit it big and you quit your day job right away. Or you might be like me - the first one didn't do so well, so you're still plugging along with three manuscripts and countless short stories on your hard drive, wondering if you should go back to the first publisher or see if there's something better out there. That's an example I figured we could all relate to.

I've learned two things when it comes to making long term plans and setting goals. First, as I mentioned before, don't put a deadline on it. Committing to the journey is a tremendous step of faith. You don't know what lies beyond that first step. In fact, it's often hidden because if we had any idea of what we were getting into, we'd know we were getting in over our heads and quit before we start. Then look at all we'd lose: The opportunity to learn, grow, accomplish a dream, and have a great blessing.

The second thing I've learned it's dangerous to make plans that depend on other people doing things that aren't certain. That's not always possible, but I try to keep it to a minimum. Everybody has their own goals and plans, and they're going to work toward what fits their wants and needs the best. For example, which goal can I control more: Getting three pieces published next year, or tripling the amount of submissions I send out next year? Obviously, getting a piece published depends on the publication. I can't help it if I get rejected. The publications have their own guidelines, themes, goals, and quotas and they aren't going to modify them because I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to get published by them to meet my own personal goal. They don't care about my goal; they care about what serves them best. I can help how many submissions I send out - and the more I send out, the greater my chances of success. That might mean you can't set a concrete goal, but it keeps you flexible and allows you to work with what you've got.

So, what are your plans and goals for the future? Do you have a timetable, or have you committed to a journey? It doesn't sound like much, but there's a huge difference between timetables and journeys.

That's all for today. I hope this has been somewhat inspiring. Have a good one.

Bye!
 

Hi folks, I hope you had a great weekend. Mine was good. I got a lot accomplished, but I did it at my own pace.

I'm happy to report that the gear switch has occured. I sent out several submissions for my longer manuscripts Saturday and today, completed my mini-meditation series in "Invalid Item" , cleaned out and organized my portfolio here, and made sure that all of my writing files are backed up, defragmented, and safely stored. So it's official: My writing is on hiatus until 2010.

I'll still blog here regularly, of course. For some reason, I don't see blogging the same as writing. I suppose when I say the writing is on break, I'm refering to my creative, fiction writing. I don't know if I'll do more entries for "Invalid Item"  through the fall. I haven't counted it out, but I don't want to push myself either. I may have some ideas for short pieces over the holidays. 2010 is my year to read The Bible again, so I'm sure it will switch gears to have reflections on my readings then. Who knows? All I can say is that we'll see. But I'll definitely be around here regularly to keep you posted on life without writing over the next few months. Maybe it will be about what I'm reading. Maybe it will be about the nonsense of my daily life. It will probably be a bit of both.

It's a strange feeling to put my writing on break. On the one hand, I'm sad. I love writing and I hate to let it go, even for a little while. On the other hand, it's a relief. There's no denying that I have a monster case of writer's block. After two years of cranking out a lot of stories, I guess it's natural that I would eventually slow down and need a break.

Yes, I definitely need a break, and I'm looking forward to other endeavors for the remainer of 2009. #1 on my list is reading. I have a lot of reading that I want to do. Not only do I want to finish reading "The Other Bible" (which I'm almost halfway through), but I want to do more reading and reviewing here and at Authonomy as well. I feel bad because I pretty much posted and ran at Authonomy. I didn't mean for that to happen. But now that things are more settled, I should be able to right that wrong soon. I also have a table in our den that needs sanding and refinishing. It belonged to my grandfather but he passed away almost 20 years ago, and it's badly in need of a makeover. The table is all scratched up not only from two decades of use from me, but however many decades that HE used it. I've had good intentions of working on it the past 2 weekends but other things drew me away from that project, so maybe the third time will be the charm. Now the house is clean, the writing is officially wrapped up, USC has a Thursday night game this week, and there's no reason I shouldn't be able to get out there and sand that table down this Saturday.

Yes, I'm sad that my writing is on break but I'm happy that I have a full life to enjoy! No doubt, plenty will rush in to fill that space very soon. In fact, it's already starting - as you can see from the last paragraph!

So that's it. I've shifted gears from Sherri the Writer to Sherri the Reader. I'm sure the next few months will be full of plenty of inspiration to restart my writing efforts in 2010. In the meantime, I'll keep you up on the journey here.

Here's hoping you have a great week. See you later.

Bye!
 

Hi folks, I hope you're having a fabulous Friday. For the first time in almost a month, it's raining! And not just a pop up shower either. It's been so long since it rained that I actually stopped in my tracks when I heard something hitting the roof last night. "What's that?" I asked. Rick and I ran to the window to see something we haven't seen in a long time - water falling from the sky. I think it rained all night too - that hasn't happened in months. Halleluia!

The week has been about cleaning up and getting organized. I don't know how things got so out of control in my life, but I've been slowly reigning it back in. The house is clean, the finances are balanced, I finally got back on the treadmill, and I have a flu shot scheduled during my lunch break today. I even managed to spend some time scouring the writing markets and completed the submissions on my short stories this week. I only sent out 4 of my stories, but I submitted them to several places. I think I've covered the contests, anthology, and magazine markets that they're suitable for pretty well. This weekend and next week I'll start looking for markets to submit my longer manuscripts to, but since I don't have as many of them it shouldn't take long. I doubt I'll submit "Blurry" anywhere since I just posted it at Authonomy, so this will be about seeking out publishers to query for my 2 children's stories.

I think it's time to give my muse a rest and take a break from the writing for a while. I've been cranking out a lot the past 2 years, and to tell you the truth I feel like my creativity is beat and busted. I'm still sputtering out a few random things. I'm working on a mini-devotional series on the seven deadly sins in "Invalid Item" , but that's almost done. After I complete these two things and get those writing submissions completed, I think it's time to take a break. My poor muse is obviously sick and in need of time to rest and recuperate. I don't want to rush myself, but I can tell that I'm slowing down and the sooner I get these things done, the sooner I'm free of the frustration of trying to beat a dead horse. As I said in my last blog entry, writer's block happens to us all.

That doesn't mean I'm going away. I'll still be around WDC. My port might not grow and I doubt I'll post much to contests, plug pages and review pages - but I will check them out for items to read, rate and review. I also need to log onto Authonomy and get to work reading stuff over there too. It looks like the remainer of 2009 will be about reading and living life, which is the greatest inspiration. I think of it as replenishing the well. Of course I'll still blog here frequently, but the tone of the entries will shift from my writing to reading and other random bits and pieces of my crazy, fun life over the coming months.

So get ready to see this blog switch gears in the next 1-2 weeks. I'll still be around and it will continue to have the same, lighthearted tone - it will just focus on other areas of my life. Hey, writer's are whole human beings. Isn't that what blogs are about - to share it all with the world?

That's all for now. Have a Happy Friday and a wonderful weekend.

Bye!
 

Hi folks, I hope your day is going well. Today I will take another break from the dribble of my mundane life to ponder on something deeper. Today's entry will be about how our thoughts affect us.

Despite a bachelor's degree in psychology, it took me a long time to realize that you can train your brain. No, you can't help you thoughts, but you can help what you choose to dwell on. I discovered the power of this about a year ago when I decided it was time to annilate the worry demon that seems to have plagued the women in my family for generations. You have to consciously choose to break the cycle.

I have to be honest and say it hasn't been an easy journey. When you delve into one emotional issue, you usually uncover a number of others that are prying around the edges. Dealing with worry made me realize how vulnerable I am to anxiety, but it also caused me to realize I was angry about a lot of things and shoved it down. I was also disappointed. In life, there are going to be times when your expectations aren't met and your hopes are sashed. So amongst fear and anxiety I also found anger and disappointment lurking around the edges. People, situations, whatever - it all came to the surface. The excavation of my soul brought to light many things that I needed to work through in order to claim the victory I sought. Simply stated, it was time for me to face reality and my reactions to it. I can't change what happened or how I reacted at the time. I can choose the lessons I take from my experiences and how (or in many cases, if) it affects me in the future.

Good enough. Now to the nuts and bolts of it. Since I am a religious person, a large amount of prayer and meditation was in order. It helped me to realize I was clinging to a lot of things (emotionally) that I needed to let go of. It was not some imaginary beast of anxiety that had me in it's grip, but the emotional memories of things that caused me to worry. I realized that if I wanted to cast this burden off my soul, I had to let go of the things that were holding me back. Only then could I take control and move forward in the best way possible.

Where anger was concerned, I had to examine myself and see if it was justified. Sometimes it wasn't. I had unrealistic expectations of people or circumstances and I should have known better. I was being a fool. Here I could at least walk away with wisdom and hope that I acted (or built my expectations) with more discernment in the future. In other situations, it was completely justified. Here, I had to forgive people. That doesn't mean that I excused them for doing me wrong. In most of these cases, the people are still just as rude, short sighted, and inconsiderate as ever. Forgiveness meant I let go of the anger they caused me and refused to give it a place to live in my soul. It was saying ok fine, you hurt me but I've learned. I hope you know better than to do that again and I'll hope we both gained wisdom. But be aware that if you get an inclination to act that way again, well, I'm wiser so don't expect the same reaction twice. Here I saw the true meaning of praying for your enemies (although "enemies" is way too strong a word to describe what they are - but you get the concept), becaue the only way I could move toward forgiveness was to pray for the Lord to work in me and that He would help them to become better people and walk in His ways too. But that's getting into material that's more appropriate for "Invalid Item"  and there are other points I want to make here. Let's wrap this paragraph up by saying that I learned that forgiveness is the most diffcult thing human beings deal with, but we must if we want to be well balanced individuals. You simply can't be a functional person if you choose to hold on to every hurt that happens. You'll become bitter, angry, and wrathful - not a pretty picture. I'm seeing something like "Doomsday" from Superman here. Don't wanna be that! But really, anger eats your soul and my soul isn't a QuarterPounder and fries, so I'll deal with it. I know it will be a lifelong process and I'll probably always be in it in some way, shape or form for all of my days. But moving on ...

I also realized that disappointment is inevitable because life is unpredictable. Everything can be lined up perfectly and it can still fall apart. All we can do is out best and we have to realize that eventually all things leave our hands. Nobody controls the world. You have to take your lessons from your experiences, learn wisdom and discernment, and allow it to make you a stronger person so you can move on (much like dealing with people). You can't let failure or disappointment create a fear in you that holds you back. Then you stagnate, and that's no way to live. Eventually you get discontented because the nature of life is change, and nothing can improve without it. Eventually, you're going to get sick of being where you are and have to make that choice of whether to stay safe and discontented, or face your fear and take a chance on moving on to better/greater things. Sometimes you win; sometimes you lose; but every day you see the sun rise, you stay in the race. That's an old thing I came up with in the early days when I was doing inspirational writer.

In the end, it all boils down to what Dad used to say to me a lot when I was living at home: Life isn't fair. The sooner you realize and accept that, the better you'll be able to deal with reality. I think I'm doing better. I find that when I choose to dwell on the good things in my life and what I'm doing to make it better, I'm happier and I worry less. Believe it or not, you can control what you think. Well, you can't control what comes to mind, but you can control what to dwell on. It's not easy at first, but once you get used to it your brain almost gets "trained" to think happier thoughts and it gets easier.

So have I defeated the enemy and arrived at victory yet? No. Life isn't perfect and I realize this will be a battle that I fight all of my days on this earth. I think I've gained something better, though. I find I'm able to face reality a lot better than I used to. I roll with life better than I did even a year ago. The unexpected doesn't throw me like it once did. I trust that all things will work out for my good in the end - whenever that might be. I've learned to walk by faith, not sight.

Sorry for the long musing, but I get long winded sometimes. I hope this entry had given you some food for thought.

Have a good day.

Bye!
 

Hi folks, I hope you're having a terrific Tuesday. So far, so good with me.

Oh, my poor, sick muse! "Invalid Item"  is the last new thing I wrote. I've been trying to dig inspiration out of the old grey matter, but I found my muse sick in bed, sputtering and coughing! I thought focusing on short stories this year would give him a break but alas, it seems I've worked him harder than I realized. I think my best course of action would be to let him rest and recover.

Truthfully, I've done a lot of writing over the past two years. There have been high and low periods, but not a point where I dried out completely since 2007. It seems writer's block has caught up with me. While I am keeping up with this blog and contributing to "Invalid Item"  every now and then, the real creative writing has come to a screeching halt.

What do you do when writer's block hits? I think the secret to dealing with writer's block is to roll with it. I disagree with people that say you must write every day or you aren't a writer. Excuse me, but I'm still a wife even when my husband and I are in different places. I'm still a daughter when I'm not with my parents. I'm still an administrator even when I'm not in the office pushing paper. Why would I cease to be a writer because I stepped away from the keyboard for a while? Boom! There goes that logic!

Maybe in the beginning you need that to get the discipline you need to stick with it, but once you're committed it sounds like a recipe for burn out. I think it does us a lot of good every now and then to take a break and experience life. After all, there's no greater inspiration than reality. When the well runs dry, we need to replenish it, and the best way to do that is by getting out from behind the computer and living.

Today I'm thinking of writer's block like I did my sprained ankle - injury from overuse. The only way to get over it is to rest and give yourself time to heal. Fortunately, there are ways you can help your writing even if you aren't actively writing. If I'm not actively writing then I can:

1. Submit what I've got to appropriate markets. I've been checking for anthologies and contests that are open to submissions and I've sent out several pieces.The process will continue through September.

2. Improve what I have. I've gone through my portfolio to update some of my favorite pieces and made sure I was offering appropriate gift points for rates and reviews.

3. Read. Whether it's rating and reviewing here or reading a book on my own time, all writers should read.

4. Live. Go to work. Go home. Do chores. Run errands. Eat and sleep. In other words, live a normal life and keep my eyes and ears open to the world around me. Inspiration is everywhere and you never know what the catalyst might be for that next rush of inspiration.

There are many ways to deal with writer's block, but I think the best thing we can do is realize that this too shall pass. If writing is a part of who you are, the inspiration will return.

That's all for now. Have a great day.

Bye!




 

Hi all, I hope you had a great weekend and the beginning of the new week is being good to you. My hard work from the weekend has spilled over into work, so I've been pretty busy this morning. I needed to take a break, so I decided to drop in and do a brief blog entry.

I guess you've noticed that I added a couple of links to my sidebar for Authonomy. Authonomy is a writing website focused on novels. I found out about it from the latest edition of Writer's Digest and decided to check it out becaue I REALLY want to get "Blurry" published and I seem to be hitting a brick wall with it. I decided it wouldn't hurt to give them a chance. So yes, I have joined another on-line writing community.

Please understand that this isn't a slight against WDC. This is a great community and I've written more since joining this site than I have before. I plan to keep my upgraded membership and stay active here. WDC really has helped me become a better writer. The problem is that while I am working on short stories, there's no denying that I do have a love for writing longer works, and when it comes to getting them rated and reviewed here, that can be a challenge.

Before I explain why, please understand that I'm not taking a swing at any of you, or anybody in particular. It's a simple matter of fact. I've read complaints from others around here on this same issue, so I believe many of you can relate to this.

The fact of the matter is that people don't read/rate/review the longer works here. If you go over 2,000 or 3,000 words, you don't get as many hits on those pieces. If you offer generous gift points for rates and reviews, you get a lot of hits on the first couple of chapters, then they drop off. People will read Chapter 1 just to get the gift points, then never come back to read the rest. I got perturbed at having my gift points taken like that and not getting feedback on the middle and end chapters, where I needed help the most. A few blessed souls did hang in there for the long haul, and I thanked them profusely for it.

I tried to be a good sport, but a friend that checks out my portfolio here talked to me about this late last year. She said that she really enjoyed my short stories and looked forward to reading every new thing I posted but frankly, she hadn't read "Blurry" or any of the novellas I posted here. She said it was because they were too long and she didn't have that much time or patience to sit in front of a computer and read a novel that way. I told her the whole point was to get feedback from real readers so I can get it good enough to get it published one day. I could tell she was clearly shocked that it was serious work and I didn't post it for kicks and giggles (to put it kindly).

I do still have a few book items in my port and will probably post novellettes and novellas here if I write any more of them. I don't know what the future holds, but I would like to write more longer works. I enjoy them and find them very fulfilling. But for now, I'm putting a 5,000 word cap on the works I post here.

Authonomy is a writing website that is exclusively for novels. I figured it couldn't hurt to give it a try. I posted "Blurry" there Thursday evening. After some thinking, I decided that Mystic Moon Press blew it with "Quarantine," so I posted it Friday. You can check out "Blurry" at http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=11829. You can check out "Quarantine" at http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=11849. I also have them posted under my "Writing Links" here. I feel "Blurry" is some of my best writing, but I do have to warn you to not expect a lot out of "Quarantine." It was one of my first fiction pieces and while I love it and put a lot of time into it, I realize I've grown as a writer since then and it probably isn't my strongest work. But Authonomy allows you to post up to five novels so I figured what the heck?


As far as other writing communities, I am also a member of FaithWriters and Ezinearticles for my non-fiction work, but I'm not very active on those sites. I usually only think to check on them every few months. But if you are interested in my non-fiction work, feel free to check out the links to my profiles at those websites as well - they're also listed under the Writing Links.

Fear not, for WDC is in my heart always. In fact, I link everything related to my writing back to my portfolio here and even use it as my primary website. I'm still growing and learning - we always do as writers, and I've grown more as a writer here than anywhere else. I don't think joining or participating on other websites is any different than, say, participating in NaNoWriMo. I know a lot of people here participate in that, and it's a great thing. I think the Internet is a great thing for writers. Writing can be such an isolated endeavor, and I believe we should use the techonolgy available to network with others and improve our work. Why not use all of the tools available to us?

I best get back to work. I've extended my break a bit longer than is proper. Here's hoping you have a great day.

Bye!