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Me again, and still confused.
I think my wife is showing the first signs of dementia.
Twice now in the past 10 days she's yelled at me, saying:
"I can't remember what it was I ever saw in you!"
Oy, still confused.
• Edited
Me again, and still confused...
Don't know what it is about people this time of year... who say I'm overly frugal.
For example, last year my neighbor got on my case when I refused to join his health club "at only $30 / month," he bellowed. But expected me to drive a mile to his club so I could walk two miles on a treadmill?
Then last week, the cleaners said it would cost $15 to clean my suit. So I donated it to the local thrift shop charity who cleaned and pressed it and put on their rack for sale where I bought it back this week for $4.50.
Oy.. still confused.
  •   4 comments
I intentionally don't wear a suit. I don't want to look like a politician.
Milhaud - Tab B Author Icon -When I see men in suits at church, I am not thinking of anything other than respect to God. lol
Inspired! I don't think Charity Shops in England would get the suit dry cleaned though - or sell it for that price!! *Shock* *Laugh*
• Edited
Me again, and still confused.
I haven't been able to come up with any new item in here lately, so thought I'd turn to the wife for inspiration.
She's the only one I know who can turn one sentence into a six hour argument.
Now that takes talent. I just don't know how to safely tap it.
Oy, still confused.
  •   2 comments
Perhaps get her to direct her talent at someone else, and just observe the result ...
so true... SO TRUE!!!

• Edited
Me again and still confused...
Sipping beers among a couple friends last night when comparing their love life when one of them said,
"I believe that being kissed while you're asleep is the purest sign of love. What do you think, DR?"
"I dunno," I shrugged. "It might be... unless you're in prison."
  •   1 comment
yeah be the inmate's named Bubba's girlfriend.
Me again, and still confused...
Just about all last week, the wife complained I don't pay any attention to her.
So on Saturday during breakfast, I asked her if she was gaining weight.
I don't know what her problem is now, but it's only Monday...
I'm figger'n she'll talk to me sooner or later.
Me again, and still confused...
When screwing things up at times, I used to feel terrible; like I was the dumbest person on the planet.
But after reading about Little Red Riding Hood, I'm feelin' better. Humph...
she's so stupid she couldn't figure out a talking wolf in drag wasn't her grandmother!
  •   1 comment
the wolf was probably flaming... and liked that sorta fetish...
It's me again, and still confused.
"What are your plans if you become rich and famous if closing on that big deal you're working on?" The wife asked while rapidly dicing up veggies for dinner.
"Oh, I think I'll become a philanderer like Bill Clinton, the papers said... especially for women starting a business," I boasted.
"What!!!" she blew up, shaking her choppin' knife at me. "Just try it, buster, and you'll go to bed a man but wake up a unic!"
Geeesh! What's eatin' her? I wondered. If Clinton can give away lots o' money, why can't I?
"And what the hell is a unic(k), anyway? I can't find it anywhere in the dictionary.
Oy, still confused.
  •   2 comments
A unic is a guy who has no genitalia, because its been chopped off. Common practice to slaves in ancient middle-eastern countries, Rome, and Greece during biblical times.

Try "eunuch." *Laugh* Not sure why the heck it's spelled that way and/or pronounced that way.
Me again, and still confused.
Hmm, since our govt is deeply mired into a stalemate over a budget bill,
I seem to recall a similar resistance in 2010 when Pelosi insisted: "we must pass this bill to see what's in it."
It got me to thinkin' during my doctor's visit today... isn't that the same thing as a stool sample?
Oy, still confused.
  •   1 comment
Ya know, I just had the shi... I mean diarrhea.
Me again, and still confused.
I know I still have a New England accent, but geeze... what's the nation coming to?
I went into a hardware store yesterday and asked a clerk where I could find some good caulk,
and he only broadly smiled at me and winked.
I immediately left that store and all the way over to Home Depot,
I practiced really hard at pronouncing that blasted "L".
Oy ve, I'm still confused.
  •   3 comments
Maybe you should have gone directly to the store's caulk stocker.
They might have really been thrown for a loop if you had added, "You know, like for a caulking gun".
Me again, and still confused.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, I got to thinkin'.
Someone once posted a question in here... "what's your favorite word?"
I didn't reply at the time, but after thinkin' about it, I kind o' like: Boob
Y'got a top view: B, a front view: oo, and a side view: b
Yeah... that's gotta be a winner.
  •   3 comments
LOL! *Laugh*
Not confused at all.
That is so clever!
Me again, and still confused
Maybe I’m just old school, but I’m baffled how quick online services can be.
Just yesterday I signed up for an exercise class at the Y, and within an hour my bank called to see if my credit card was stolen.
Seems technology is really something these days, eh?
  •   2 comments
It really is, but not all technology is created equal. I remember getting a text message in the middle of nowhere on my way back to Colorado from New York. It was my bank, telling me there was suspicious activity on my card and to please call them right away. Naturally, there wasn't enough signal strength for a phone call, just for the text message (this puzzles me mightily, too). It was a good twenty minutes before I got to the next town and was able to tell them it was just me wandering the Lower 48.
I once got one of those notifications and called thinking that, of all the crazy things I buy online, no doubt, it was my purchase. The lady in the fraud department asked me if I'd bought exercise clothing. "Oh, no. That definitely wasn't me!"

Donation to the Livestock Conservancy, definitely. Ticket to fly across the US from Atlanta to Los Angeles today because I didn't get around to buying it sooner, sure. Perfume making supplies for me, yep. (One of many short-lived hobbies.) The Book of Hours prayer book for a friend in prison, check. 25 foot Jumper cables, of course. But exercise clothes? No way! I'm glad you know me better than that! lol
Me again, and still confused.
My wife loves animals so I finally caved and got her a puppy.
After a week or so of getting acquainted, she asked what we should name him.
I bluntly suggested, "Egypt"... because he'd left a pyramid in every room in the house.
Oy ve... still confused.
  •   2 comments
I think she may be in de Nile.
Waltz Invictus Author Icon - and I’M in the doghouse!
20 years...seems so odd, doesn't it? Right but ... *grin*
Happy Account Anniversary!
Happy 20th WDC Anniversary, DRSmith!
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