sunday night in the car

red one, a Porsche
I got three black Jaguars
what was the plate, the plate?
didn't catch the plate?
out of state, in state, no plate no rate!
big smarty pants didn't catch the plate!
yeah, well, we see more cars
speeding on the highway
make him shut up about the dumb…
…didn't catch the plate, stupid mor…
…atorium
car rules boys! no swearing
no fun mama
big people make the rules, squirt!

         hubby dear, as usual, is already thinking about
         stocks and bonds, his boring-moron investment club
         they're his brats too
         he never takes any time,
         especially not in the car

you know where I left the yellow folder
for Simpson and Brackens?

         (quite frankly my dear
         I couldn't give a damn!)

mama, gotta pee
get out and run to the ditch!
you'll catch up…
no way boys, you just hold it another few miles
but that's hours at this stupid rate!
the cars are going in REVERSE
man! I gotta GOOOOOOO

so run into the ditch, see if I care
just don't get it bit off
he's gonna get it bit off
by a snake
you're so weird

         of course their father must have earplugs
         why didn't we take the train?
         could've gone to the bar and drunk myself silly
         had a nice meal
         imagined I'm single and pretty again

great Scots, a Silver Cloud
puffing along in the emergency lane
I get fifty points for that one
didya get the plate on that one little brother?

         don't those brats ever shut up?
         they can't be mine!
         can't even hear my stomach rumble
         at least they're not yelling about food
         …yet
         I could do with a cheeseburger, ice-cream float, Doritos, Fritos
         an ice cold BEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
         anything but a thousand cars
         stuck in reverse
         some holiday weekend!

yuck mama, that's Donna Summer
too loud, boooooring
try to imitate your father's silent-traveling meditation
has he said a word in the last three hours?
yuck, turn it OOFFFFF
         "last dance, last dance for love
         yes, it's my last chance
         for romance tonight"
you want me to start singing along with her?




         sunday night in the car
         5 may, 2006
         (Writer's Cramp)