First Flight

"Oh my god, I can't do this."
"Sir, please calm down, everything will be fine."
"Stewardess, it's my first flight. I can't do this. Oh god, I'm scared to death!"
"Nothing's going to go wrong, sir. Please, you have to calm down."
"I can't. Oh god, we're all going to die. We'll crash and burn..."
"Don't be silly. Flying is much safer than driving."
"Right. How many cars have fallen 30,000 feet into the Atlantic Ocean?"
"We won't be flying over the ocean, sir. Please."
"Oh, that's right. We'll just crash into a mountain. That makes me feel much better."
"You're making the passengers nervous. Please come sit down. It's almost time to taxi."
"I can't do it! I can't. Please, let me off!"
"Sir, you have to calm down! Now get your ass in the cockpit and fly this goddamn plane!"
"Alright, Alright. But, if we all die, don't say I didn't warn you."