Life or the end

Life or is it the end?
 
There is no urge to move,
the will to stand escapes,
the need to keep going disappears,
I lie down and contemplate my life.
 
A life full of complications,
deceit, hatred, lust and endless manipulations.
Is there any day that it was as easy as one, two, three...?
 
What happened to the easy things,
the beautiful baby my mother brought home,
the dreams, the pure innocence?
All gone; disappeared and left behind
a crumpled mass that lies on the ground.
 
Oh! I should just give up,
call it the end and walk away.
Head into the horizon and find a new beginning.
But, I cannot do so.
It is my life...I must make it better.
I must.