Just being

Here I am;
thinking of heaven,
while living in hell.
Here I am;
thinking of you,
while dying alone.

My heart cries
for you to be here.
My soul wanders lonely,
staying away from
this obsessed me.
My life crawls
down this face,
flowing with blood
flooding my eyes.

One can no longer live
those peaceful dreams
in these nightmares.
My mind is flooded
with clones all around.

Your hands;
are reaching out for me.
Your hands;
vanish when sought for.

With each breath,
feeling older, closer to death.
With each second
an obsessed hope
is lost in time.

And here I am.
Just living in hell, dying alone.
Here I am, with a mute heart
and a crippled soul.

And here I am. Just being.
For you and me,
can never be us.