|When I was a little girl, I was singled out at school for my writing skills. At 10 years old, my teacher set the class a short story for homework. We each had to write a modern day version of Romeo and Juliet. She picked mine as the best and the class performed a production of it. In my yearbook later that year she wrote 'I hope you go on to become a famous writer one day'. I was 11, but I had high hopes of being one myself.
When I went to secondary school, my English teacher told my parents that I was a talented writer. I got top grades for my creative writing. Not poetry, but stories, and I got such a huge amount of pleasure out of writing them.
Later on, we stopped writing creatively and began writing critically. I was still successful at this type of writing but I have a feeling that that's when the creative part of me began to bury itself someone I can't seem to find.
I went to university to study literature. Again, I was told I wrote very well - in terms of style, language, ability to engage. Still, this was more critique and analytical work and books and references, and even less creativity. It buried itself even further.
Upon leaving university, I went into the world of book publishing. Right world, but wrong side of it. I found this frustrating and decided to go for journalism instead. I really saw myself as a feature writer for a glossy magazine, writing about all the things that interested me and that were current and controversial. Sadly, what I didn't realise was that there are so many talented writers. And that somehow you need to stand out. I had a few pieces published here and there, but I'm ashamed to say that I failed at gaining permanent employment as a writer and I gave up.
Now I work for a national newspaper, in editoral management. This means I'm involved in absolutely everything that goes into making a newspaper every single day, except I have nothing at all to do with the writing side. So I've ended up in the creative business on the non-creative side.
I'm not unhappy in my job because I'm good at it and it's interesting and challenging, but deep down I'm frustrated and disappointed in myself, because I haven't lived up to my own expectations. I know that the answer is to motivate myself to start writing again, creatively, but I don't remember how to do that. And I don't even know whether I still can.
That's my history. That's why I'm here.
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