Doubts

Heard some news today
Having such a great time
Chicks are hot
Grog's cheap
Night life's amazing
Oh yay!
Can't you see
How excited I am?
You're off
Having the time of your life
In the land
With the most beautiful girls
And I'm suppose to smile?
Nuh-uh
I don't think so
Not this time
I'm going to tell you how I feel
While I lay here
Missing you
Crying for you
Screaming out your name
You're off getting trashed
Chatting up the gals
Hanging with the boys
Can't you see?
You have to understand
I can't laugh
Can't be a dag
Can't be the 'me'
You want me to be
I'm going to lie here
Hugging My Bear
Cuddling your Rupert
Crying into my pillow
Dropping big wet tears on your top
Thinking about what might have been
Wondering if everything
I thought I knew
Is wrong
Questioning everything
I believed in
Trusted in
Loved in
You