Wish i no longer

The match is lit
The nerve been hit
The fire begins to burn
From this place I adjourn
I sense defeat
And into the dark
I retreat

Trapped in the mind
No reason I can find
For living
For breathing
But cling I must
To the one that I trust
The snap comes
And it passes

What have I become?
A dark shadow of
What I once was
Only kept afloat from drowning
By thoughts of my beloved

It clouds my judgment
Yet saves me from torment
Like a hard shove
I move forward by
The force of love
And wish I,
No longer, to die