Wayward Thoughts

I want to blame it all on you;
my unreal expectations,
your unfilled obligations.
But bliss fights ignorance
while reason weeps,
jealousy laughs
and fear broods cagily,
as I compose another
singular fantasy.
I pasted your smile
next to mine and I tested
my resolve in a night alone
reciting your lines as sonnets,
twisting your oblivious personage
to my twisted desires
and I would torture reality until
I could taste you on my pillowcase.
Disappointment is frequent,
your pasted smile peels.
But I’ll sit hopeful on the carpet,
our conversation already complete,
waiting for a fabricated arrival
that never arrives.