Porcelain Masks

Porcelain Masks

They all see the smile upon her porcelain mask. The perfect curve of her perfect lips. They all say, "Oh, how beautiful she is." They compliment the lies she puts forth. The mask hides all the tears that mar her "perfect" beauty.

She sits in a huge crowd, her heart twinging with the agony of being alone. No one sees, all afraid to admit the truth. She just lets them believe. Because of their fear, she too is afraid. She cowers from reality by building fantasies.

False worlds protect her. But the protection isn't protection. She is killing herself by being who they all want to see.

Alone in her room. Real safety, her true haven; she removes her mask. Without the porcelain beauty she cries her tears. Pain pours out of her soul. All her pain...it fills every molecule in her being. She screams in a silent voice, "Too much pain!"

She has fallen too deep. Her soul has folded into itself. She has collapsed beneath the burden she never should have born. She so wants to give up.

"Save me. I want to give up, but I don't," she cries out to the air. "I don't want to be here. I'm rotting in this prison of a sanctuary. Bring me from the darkness to the light."

Her cries just fade into silence. Who wants to hear cries of lost souls? Who wants to save those cursed so wholly? Of course no one cares.

She's just fine. Nothing is wrong. It will all be okay. Everyone tries to hide from the truth they see pouring from her expressive eyes. They are all that mask cannot hide. Look deep into her broken soul. Don't let her let go. She needs you. She already feels as though she is nothing, as though she is gone. Don't let her make that reality.

No one tries to save her. They watch her fade slowly away. They don't listen to what she says. They watch as she closes her eyes one last time. They read her final words, shocked at the great pain she hid so well. They finally see, finally comprehend all they tried to deny.

They always say the pain will end, will pass with time. How can they be so sure? Do they know how it feels to look at the world and feel invisible? Have they felt the absence of loving touches? Did they ever waste their whole lives living lies everyone else wanted to see? Do they have any idea how it feels to sit in the darkness of their own fears, begging for the light of love, knowing no one cares enough to save you? I highly doubt it. They have no idea. So I write these last words with death running through all my thoughts incessantly. I pen these words and say good-bye, begging that you finally SEE.

They see. But the vision fades as time goes by. They forget the beautiful girl who lost herself. They forget the porcelain masks people put on. They forgot the truth, denied it and created more lies.

So ends this sad tale. A tale of sorrow and pain that doesn't seem to end. I end this as she ended her lies. Please stop lying to yourself and all those around. Admit to the masks and finally have the courage to remove them. And when you see a lonely soul wandering about, don't be so hesitant and afraid to save her, to love her, to make her happy. STOP FEARING THE TRUTH...


This was written on February 21, 2006. Please tell me what you think. Muchos gracias.