Night terrors

4/18/94 (age 18)

Blackness of night overshadows everything
Creeping shadows sneaking over the ground.
Ebony trees battle with moonlight..and light is fading fast.
Suffocating pulsing air throbbing around me.
Mind on hold..frozen by fear. limbs refuse to follow the directions

The prescence descends..skin prickles..awareness..
Night leaping with escalating force
Acid burning smell devours the essence of night.
Mind screams and legs pay attention this time.
Sprinting to somewhere....nowhere....searching.
Conflicting eyes wanting to close against the unknown
but remain unwavering...survival depends on it.
Thousands of hands reaching out tugging my hair.

Footsteps..real or imagined?
Sweat overflowing every pore...
No ounce of relief.
Wind bearing me down, wanting to take me off my feet.

Arms enfold me with comforting grace.
Fingers close in welcoming embrace.
Tempting me with softness..caressing
Feeling the entire length along my body.
Relentless unbreakable contact.
Jumping, not sure if it's warmth..or burning
Relief courses through me...but frozen.
Arms pinned to my sides and legs trembling.
Hot breath against my neck..
So drowsy as eyes relax close..
Rocking..swaying..whisper soft fingers everywhere

White hot agony steals my breath
Over and over hurting more and more.
Convulsing, bucking against the steel strength
Clawing, scratching, fighting to breathe..to live
Blood boiling, sucking in air hoping it's enough

Screaming....awake..dizzy..listening for signs.
Sweat soaked sheets and the smell of my own fear
Give way to awareness of the dream.
So cold...icy cold...shivering..
Nightmare is over...
or is it?