Diary of a Hotel General Manager

Diary of a Hotel General Manager

March 23, 2000

How life has worked out for me. Having it all for the moment was fun. Now, it’s back to the beginning. Key West is great, but I think I’ll move to New York in the fall.

June 25th, 2000

“Change is good. We plan on renovating the resort and making it a five-star hotel. We expect the hotel to be done by spring of next year. Since that will be our busiest season, we hope to have you all in tip-top condition. If anyone doesn’t like the newpolicy, we will not hold you back from pursuing other ventures. We just hope to keep you as an excellent staff. So, I would like to introduce your new Hotel Manager, Mr. Prominence”

Wednesday Afternoon, June 25th, 2000

“You are free to make the necessary changes, Brick. You can see we have alot of cleaning up to do, but we trust you will do a good job. I understand if you have to leta few managers go. We have already lost five, but an ad is being placed in the papers. Plus, I have a few headhunters on the job now. Good luck and I will check on you in September.”
 
August 2nd, 2000

This place is a real dump. However, I think I can bring it up to par. They have me staying in the Penthouse. I can overlook the hotel grounds with a view of the ocean. It’s real nice. Key West sure beats Napa. Now, the only problem is that I have to teach these southern yokels about wines. I’ll have the secretary set up appointments next week. Emily is able to get an interview at the Lawall Resort. Hopefully, she can get a sales position. My young wife to be is a smart one. I’ve got to be careful around the other men. I saw the way the other managers and staff look at her. No doubt they’re commenting about our age difference. Screw them, it’s only fifteen years. They shouldn’t be surprised that she pursued me. We met at another location. She was the sweet restaurant manager and I was food and beverage director. My divorce had been a bitch, but Emily had been there for me. Oh, how she had been there. She is a pressuring minx, though. I don’t know if I’m ready for another marriage. Maybe, I can string this date business alittle longer.

August 6th, 2000

Had to let the banquet manager go. He was some fag who didn’t like my ideas. That’s okay. I don’t know how I feel about some fairy working for me. It’s not discriminative, we’ll just say that we had some creative differences. I looked over all the employees. Wow, there are some old biddies in the restaurant and banquets. Some of them are writing their own damn schedule. That’s gonna stop. I’m gonna talk to the restaurant manager tomorrow, she’s a redhead with a big ass. She wears skirts too small for her. I think she is flirting with me. I’m thinking about doing her, but it might be too soon. Hell, at least, I know she’ll do anything for me. I saw how she talks to her staff. She can be a bitch, but her old favorites have got to go. I need a good-looking staff.

August 12th, 2000
         
I’m so fucking high right now. Entertained some of the big wigs from corporate. We drank four bottles of wine plus pre and after dinner drinks. Emily had a good time. The bill cost five hundred, but what the hell? I can do that. I’m God around here. The cocktailers looked at me with disgust; but then again they’re below me. I don’t give a shit about them. Just do your job and cater to me. Some of them are cute. That little mulatto is a honey. The blond thinks she knows it all. She’s been working and caring about this job for too long. I can see it in her eyes. She has the thirst to run things. Maybe she would make a good assistant manager. I’ll have to think about it. Mack, the group sales manager was eyeballing Emily. I know what he was thinking, but she comes home to me. Keep looking at my fiancée, we’ll see how long your job lasts.

August 20th, 2000

Approved order for new dishes, silverware, chairs and tables for outside patio. The interior designer is visiting this weekend. The new banquet manager, Kate seems pretty good. She’s already let some of those biddies go.  Susan, the restaurant manager, let her old favorites go. I heard they didn’t put up a fight. Maybe it was good for them. So now I don’t feel so guilty and why should I? It’s my job. If they only knew how I got here?  I started out as a bartender, but dating and screwing the bosses’ daughter helps. Laurie, my boss wasn’t happy at the time since I was sleeping with her too, but hey I got her job. A nice easy sweep, killing two birds with one stone. Got a new job and got rid of a clinging mistress at the same time. The next year, I married the daughter and became food and beverage manager. Nice, very nice, I must say. Kelly was a good wife for ten years, no children thank God. Got out of the marriage and that company. Free to do what I wanted. No father and boss to play master over me.

August 29th, 2000

The chamber of commerce dinner was a success. Finally taught these beachcombers a thing or two about service. Front desk was impeccable. Service was great and food, well could have been better, but have a new chef coming in the fall. Kate is a cutie, seems a little timid, but she’ll do what I say. It appears she has a tight knit with the staff. Good idea, Brick, hiring a girl whom knew half of the staff already. Emily is ecstatic about the wedding. She’s found a place overlooking the ocean. It’s good to see her smile. Too bad I couldn’t go with her, but in the end I have the final word. We’ll see about this place. Who am I kidding? I’m not ready to get married next year.

September 10th 2000

Found a chef, got rid of Mack, promoted the maintenance guy to guest room manager, wine and dined the big wigs from corporate, ordered more wine, started wine tastings, had Susan hire new young staff, decided on final renovations for the restaurants, redid the bar, liquor and wine rooms and decided to let Emily go. It was for the best, but I can’t believe she left me. Oh well, I still look good and now I’m free to play again. I wonder if Kate would go out with me, but the little mulatto in the lounge is a good chase. Susan had the nerve to apologize for losing Emily and then invited me over for drinks. I told her I would take a raincheck. Been visiting the lounge for drinks after work often. The food and beverage manager and me have been hitting it off. Garrison is a good asskisser plus, he’s got good taste. I wonder if he’s gay? He’s alright with me, unlike someone I know. Got hit with a lawsuit from Mack. He claims wrongful termination. Whatever, corporate is handling it.

September 20th, 2000

Susan just left. I fucked her good and hard. It felt good. I had to release some tension. She’s gonna create a new menu with Alex, the new chef. She understood it was only a sex thing. God, I hope so. The last thing I need is to have is a mistress as an employee. Speaking of employees, the little mulatto wants to leave. Claims she isn’t making enough money. I can’t let her go she looks too good. I told her that I would try to get her better hours. Emily is dating someone new. Didn’t take the whore too long to find someone. I emailed her with some lovesick threats. Ha, it’s better than slashing her tires. Just can’t let her go easily, gotta make her suffer some more. Maybe, tonight I’ll stop by and pledge undying love, fuck her then leave her. They started renovations on the rooms. Everything is looking up. Only been here for three months and things have changed for the better. We’re about to hit a good season, winter. I’ve got alot of Weddings before Hurricane season. Gretchen, the new group sales manager, is working out just fine. Women are so good to order around. No, that’s not sexist. It’s powerful.

October 3rd, 2000
         
Chewed out Kate today. She actually had tears in her eyes, but the dumb bitch had her servers placing dirty plates on the reception buffet lines. Then, I went through the banquet room and found unpolished silverware and glasses. This isn’t fucking Denny’s. That’s my ass on the line and a loss of four thousand dollars from unsatisfied clients. I gave it to her good, in front of her staff. I bet those little monkeys will never make a mistake again. After I got through with her, I treated Garrison and myself to a nice meal and wine in the restaurant. I can’t let that shit happen again in banquets. Susan and I screwed again, but what the hell, I’m horny. Her ass turned out to be pretty handy in bed. Maybe, she deserves a raise. Fuck, who am I kidding? I can’t afford that yet. I’ll let her get a bottle of wine from the restaurant instead. That’ll make her happy. Women love little gifts.

October 17th, 2000

Strategically got rid of April, the Human Resource girl and hired Clarissa. Clarissa and I worked in Phoenix together. No past with her except drinking buddies. I think she’s a dyke or maybe that’s my ego talking. Clarissa needed a new job and a change. I talked to her a couple of weeks ago. I couldn’t find anyone I wanted to let go. I thought about the front desk manager, but she’s too good. Then April came into mind; I had caught her spreading gossip about me to some other co-workers. She was actually talking to waiters from the restaurant about how I took a couple of women (visiting clients) into the whirlpool. Nothing happened, but the bitch was spreading rumors. I fired her for insubordination and moved Clarissa in. Great job on my part. She actually pleaded with me that her heart was in the job for the workers. I told her to find another job. This is a business not a romance.

November 5th, 2000

I had Susan do a survey on New Years’ night. I asked her what the employees thought would be fair pay for working that evening. She came back to me with each employee wanting to earn about four hundred dollars that evening. Hey kids, the Millennium is over. I told her if they walked or refused, I’d hire a whole new staff. She looked at me like I was crazy. I told her to get over it. They had screwed up on an important corporate dinner and I was ready to fire the whole lot of monkeys. Fucking kids, spoiled brats, they think going to college and partying is so cool. Motherfuckers should join the real world. They’ll never amount to much. They don’t have the balls.

November 19th, 2000
         

Ran into the little mulatto today. She gave her resignation two weeks ago. She claimed that she was gonna give full massages for a living. I caught the little bitch working at Harry’s. It’s a new place on the beach. Great Menu. I was entertaining some friends and there she was serving another table. I told her that I would do everything in my power to switch over to her banquets; however, Kate had already had some new hires. I couldn’t do anything that didn’t seem suspicious, but mulatto girl had lied to me. I went up to her and told her that she better keep her job there because I would make sure she wouldn’t get another job in Key West, little tease. I thought I might be able to get with her. Fuck her. She’ll probably tell another lie again.

December 4th, 2000

Full renovations are almost done. Christmas is almost here and after New Years, it’s party central here. I’m dating Julie. She works for the local advertising firm. They’ve been doing some beautiful advertisements for the hotel. Julie has nice long legs and long brown hair. She used to be a model in Miami Beach, now she’s my girlfriend. No more Susan or lust for Kate or mulatto girl. Julie is it. I plan to keep her for awhile. I plan on going back to Texas for the holidays. Mom, dad and family are all there. It will be great to go home and back to “Everything is bigger and better in Texas” Things are good. Ran into Emily the other day. She looked happy with her new man. He looked like a pussy, but maybe, she’s found someone that she can wrap around her finger. Julie is waiting for me, gotta go.

December 18th, 2000

A bartender actually said hello to me while I was in the middle of talking to the big wigs. I didn’t say anything to him. Don’t these monkeys know not to speak to me unless I address them? I’ll have to tell Susan to put them in step. They’re good-looking, but nobody’s behind the wheel. Going home in two days and I can’t wait. It’s been awhile since I had a trip. Been working out in the gym. God, I love being the GM. All the perks are nice. Free rent, food, furniture and gym facilities. I knew I was destined for something big. This hotel looks fantastic thanks to me. Hopefully, I’ll get a raise. What the hell, I’m gonna buy that new Mercedes anyway. All you monkeys, look out. Wait

         “Yeah, Karen, send up a bottle of Frogs Leap, I’ll sign for it. Uh huh, hey, if I forgot to sign last night’s ticket, how come Susan didn’t do it? Put Susan on the phone. Hey Susan, if you don’t get my signature, you can sign for it. I don’t need your fucking staff questioning how I’m gonna pay a bill. Uh Huh, you too. Good night.”
         Monkeys, fucking monkeys.

January 2nd, 2001
         
New Year’s was wonderful, but some of the staff got drunk. Sorry, had to let them go. No excuse. Let daddy and college get them another job. Good thing though, some of them were getting alittle crazy. One day, I swear I could smell pot on them. They only got paid 250 that night, but hey that’s fair. I can be good, sometimes. Julie and I attended the party and fuck; this place has done a 180. New uniforms and china. The staff is alright. Some of them are doing a good job. I can honestly say that I’m proud.

January 21st, 2001
         
Holy shit! This place is rocking. Banquets and rooms filled. Thanks to the new menu, rooms, and banquet facilities, this hotel is making lots of money. Gonna get a bonus. Gonna get a bonus. Damn, I’m good.
         I’m the GM
         I run the place.
         This hotel runs smooth
         and full of grace.
         Everyday an employee flinches when I walk by
         but hey I’m the big guy in the sky.
         I order drinks, expensive meals everyday
         but I just sign for corporate to pay.
         It takes a lot of smarts and know how to be this good
         and all you monkeys wish you could.

         I’m the boss and the brawn
         and I’ll be here in the dawn.
         So, don’t you fuck with me or get in the way,
         cause if you do, I’ll make you pay.
         If you want to succeed,
         All you have to ask is,
        “Can I kiss your ass please?”



February 10th, 2001

“Brick, you have done a great job, really. The hotel looks great. The staff is wonderful and everything is absolutely beautiful. I can’t say how much I want to thank you. However, we are experiencing some set backs in the company. This is not the only hotel that we have purchased and redone. I’m afraid that only are senior people are all we are able to afford. They’re all willing to relocate. We’re just gonna
have to let you go. Believe me, we’ll give you a good recommendation and some severance pay. I wish there were other properties we could send you to, but we just don’t have anything available. I’ll keep your resume on file for future positions. Again, thank you, Brick, for all your help.”


March 25th, 2001

         “We have Anchor Steam, Killians, Bud, Miller Light, Sam Adams and Guiness    on Tap.”

         “So, that’s all you got. I’ll take a Killians.”

         “That will be three-fifty.”

         “It’s happy hour, it’s two-fifty.”

         “This is an import, it’s three-fifty.”

         “Hey, the sign says for all Taps.”

         “If I ring it in, it will be two-fifty, that’s the cost.”

         “Look, where’s your fucking manager?”

         “He’s in the back, but I’m telling you, it’s three-fifty.”

         “Look, you fucking monkey, go fetch your boss, cause you don’t know what the fuck you’re
         talking about and by the way, what’s your name.?”
         
         “It’s Brick, asshole, Brick Prominence.”