A Day in Court

Written for the Dialogue 500 Contest. A lawyer and his client are heard whispering during the man's murder trial.

“Did you just fart?”

“Sort of”

“That’s really fowl!”

“Yea, bad beans, they’re nasty.”

“Wait, what do you mean sort of?”

“Well, I sort of farted and I sort of shit my pants.”

“You just shit yourself?”

“Just a little”

“A little? That’s nasty!”

“Sorry, it just slipped out again.”

“Oh damn, I can’t breathe”

“Settle down, were in court you know!”

“I know, but I can’t help it, your killing me.”

“Stop it, the jury will think were guilty!”

“My eyes are starting to water”

“Take a deep breath and relax.”

“I can’t, the smell is burning my nose.”

“You have to keep your poise, the jury is looking at us!”

“Are you messing with me? I’m going to get sick.”

“”Shhhh, be quiet”

“I can’t, Your Honor! Can I get a new public defender? Mine just shit his pants!”

176 Words