The Answer Is Blowing In The Wind

The Answer Is Blowing In The Wind


What would you like for Christmas?
Book, watch or a diamond ring?
What about for your birthday?
Well now, I have just the thing!
Not only will it give you a blast,
it’ll save the planet too.
I know this all sounds amazing,
and you’ll hardly believe it is true.

You see, ev’ry single one of us,
and the pets that we take to our heart,
Well, we all – to put it bluntly –
Break wind – oh blow it - we fart!
Now this flatulence contains methane,
A greenhouse gas through and through.
This all contributes to climate change;
Is there anything that we can do?

Well, someone’s discovered the answer –
they must have wonderful dreams –
we can all buy carbon credits
in emissions trading schemes!
You can buy your dad or your partner
the carbon credits they need
to offset their nether emissions;
thus, from their guilt they’ll be freed.

It seems a wonderful system –
for those who have money to buy.
Your farts – and your cat’s – will be covered;
they won’t go up into the sky.
So, don’t worry about wasted power;
drive off in you huge S.U.V.
My gift to you lets you off the hook –
you can now let your wind blow free!



Written after reading an article, “Green answer is blowing in the wind” in the “Weekend Australian”: It told of people buying carbon credits as gifts for their loved ones to cover their own emissions or their pets’.

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