It Rained Today

It rained today, and I thought of you.
It rained that night you told me you loved me under the Paris lights
You cried because it was the first time you uttered those words
Since your husband died.
I cried because I didn't love you.
We sat in the downpour staring bewildered at each other.
You thought we were dating; I thought we were friends.
You said, "Fuck it, I don't care."
And we made love that night in your apartment.
The walls were a faded yellow, and the wood floor creaked under our combined weight.
Candles flickered in the breeze from the open window,
And again you cried as we made love.
I tried to stop but you begged to keep going.
Then, you cried until exhaustion took you.
I watched you sleep and found perfection.
You didn't stir as I ran my fingertips along your chin.
I let my hands explore your body, every soft, delicate inch was known to me.
I fell asleep wondering if this was love,
And woke to an empty apartment.
You left the country and my life.
I sit here in Detroit across from my beautiful wife and remember you.
Now that I am married, I know that it was truly love.
I, also, know that I can never have it back.