Suicide

I feel like slitting my wrist

watching the blood ebb away in tiny droplets

until the sheets are red.



I feel like popping pills

one by one until the bottle is empty

it wouldn't do to gulp them all at once

because you would just throw up.



I feel like walking into oncoming traffic at rush hour

seeing the split second before the darkness

and then no more.



but mostly I feel like cutting myself

just cutting

tracing lines of blood with a razorblades

physical manifestation of emotional pain

watching it flow just flow

feeling the release

pain-release



I feel like going to the ocean

my favourite place on the edge of the cliff

and just falling

falling

into nothingness

the ending of all pain.



But mostly

I feel like slitting my wrist.