Ode to Spaghetti

ODE TO SPAGHETTI

How plain it is, just flour and water.
As good as it is, you’d think that it oughter
Be full of good stuff, like chocolate or ice cream,
But it’s not! It’s plain; it’s nobody’s dream.

You don’t cook it fancy: no baking, no broiling.
No troublesome braising – it’s happy with boiling.
Don’t fricassee this, or treat it like candy
Or roast it or toast it, plain boiling’s just dandy.

Of course it’s much nicer, when it is all done,
To cover it with sauces and meatballs for fun.
Tomato puree and parmesan cheese
And spices like pepper and oregano, please.

But though it is certainly easy to make,
Eating's not simple – it’s no piece of cake!
Learning how takes years to get it just right.
Otherwise, oh, won’t you leave such a sight!

Cutting it makes it fall off your fork,
But slurping it up makes you look like a dork,
Leaving spots on the floor and staining your clothes,
And hanging like yuck from off of your nose.

Twirling it gently with fork upon spoon
Is supposed to make it behave itself soon
And hang nicely together so you can partake
Without leaving your lap a tomato sauce lake!

Now if you’re still young, that’s all a great joy.
It’s better than playing with ball or with toy!
What child does not fail to rejoice in the messy?
It’s mothers who make their youngsters look dressy.

So kids have no problems until they must speak
The name of this food. It would take me a week
To list all the ways that children invent
For their favorite dish. Their tongues get all bent!

It’s sketti, skabetti, and betti and bet;
Pasketti, tapetti, petti and sket;
And more, you see, there really are oodles
Of ways of saying what really are noodles.

But especially eating with garlic on rolls,
Americans love it, and Germans, and Poles,
Thank Chinese and Italians who first got this ready:
Our messy and scrumptious tongue-twisting spaghetti.