Alternatives to Hurting Yourself

(Note:This is a work-in-progress. More suggestions will be coming soon. I wish I could take credit for this list, but most of these suggestions came from other websites which are listed on the Safe Harbor main page.)

The following is a list of things to do instead of hurting yourself. Some are distractions. Some are for comfort. Some are alternative ways to feel the release that self-harm can bring. Please be safe while reading this list.

Distractions
*Read something you enjoy.

*Get comfortable and watch TV or a movie. Preferably a comedy (the sillier, the better), a children's movie, or something with a happy ending. Avoid dark dramas and police procedurals.

*Meditate. Focus on a single object or close your eyes. Focus only on your breathing. Let all other thoughts fade away.

*Set goals for yourself to see you through difficult parts of the day/week/month. Reward yourself for each goal you complete. This can help take your mind off self-injury. Set goals that you can reach - don't be too hard on yourself.

*Do something to help someone else, especially someone less fortunate than yourself. A friend of mine used to tell me you can't make someone else smile without making yourself smile too. Helping someone else can make you feel really good about yourself too.

*Do something for yourself. Get a new haircut. Buy yourself something special or go on a shopping spree. Get a massage.

*Clean! It doesn't sound like fun, but it will distract you and can actually be comforting and even cathartic. You can put all your emotional energy into it.

*Do something with a friend. Or lots of them. The best thing for you right now may be to be around other people. For me, personally, it made me feel safer and kept me from doing anything to myself. I have spent several nights on friends' couches just to keep myself safe.

*Play with a pet.

*Play video games! Get lost in something like Kingdom Hearts that takes a long time to finish.

*Hang out on writing.com. Read, review, write, and make new friends in scroll.

*Knit!

*Do arts and crafts projects! If you don't have any materials or ideas, visit a local arts and crafts store like MIchael's. That can be a fun, inspirational distraction in itself.

*Write letters to friends and loved ones.

*Give yourself permission to do anything fun that you've been putting off.

*Find copyright-free clip-art online and make some sigs.

*Do some scrap booking!

*Work a jigsaw puzzle.

*Create! Paint, draw, sculpt, or write. Do anything creative. It doesn't have to reflect or express what you're feeling right now. Just let go and have fun with it. If nothing else, grab a coloring book and some crayons. You have my permission to color outside the lines and make the sky green.

*Play with Legos or Lincoln Logs.

Comfort
*Get a warm drink, like hot chocolate, and curl up under some warm blankets with a stuffed animal or a pillow. Read a good book or watch a light-hearted movie.

*Take a nice, warm bath. Use bubbles. (But remove any razors from the tub area.)

*Listen to music. You can find songs that expess what you're feeling (sadness, anger, etc.) or you can find songs that are hopeful and comforting.

*Create an internal safe place where you can go when you are feeling out of control. Imagine anything that is peaceful and happy for you: a garden, the beach, a waterfall (maybe even this one: "Safe Harbor waterfall banner" ). Fill it with as many details as you like. Visit your special safe place as often and for as long as you like.

*Hug yourself. When I have panic attacks and want a hug, I put each of my hands on the opposite shoulder. Then I press down. I used to call these God hugs because I would imagine it was God hugging me. But it also works as a self-hug. It feels good to show yourself love and compassion.

*Cuddle, love on, or play with a pet. If you don't have a pet, visit a friend or neighbor who does. Or visit the local pet store and ask to play with the puppies. Pets are wonderful for comfort. They love you unconditionally and ask very little of you.

Alternatives
*Exercise. Walk, run, swim--anything to wear yourself out and use up the burst of energy you're feeling. This also gets endorphins flowing which will help you feel better.

*Beat the living daylights out of pillows or cushions.

*Lie on your bed and kick and scream. Let it all out.

*Draw or paint to express yourself and release emotional energy.

*Write. Don't censor yourself. Let everything out. Give yourself permission to color and scribble all over the page, to bear down as hard on the paper as you want.

*If you want to see blood, use a red marker instead of a sharp object.

*If you want pain/sensation, use a toothbrush instead of a sharp object.

*If you want pain, wear a rubber band on you wrist (not too tight) and snap it when you get the urge to hurt yourself.

*If you want burning/sensation, hold ice in your hands. Then run your hands under warm water.


Please email me any suggestions or things that have worked for you. Thank you.