Alone

When I am alone
With no one around
No one to talk to
No other sounds
I think about him.

My Dad
A man I always respected
A man I always looked upon.

I considered myself lucky
To have both parents together
When friends weren't so blessed.

Not talking to him
Makes it even harder
Not to hate him more and more.

Losing him to some other
Seeming more important
More sequential than I.

I love my father dearly
But I hate him as a man.

To hurt the ones who loved him most
To only care about having sex
To know that's what he thought of marriage.

It scares me to think
Someday it could happen to me
And what of my sons
Would they still respect me?

I hate being alone.