I Know What You Are

So long have I kept the army of pain at bay
         kept my cold, calculating heart untouched
         defended by the seemingly impenetrable fortress
         erected to protect me.
In these matters, I am a master engineer and architect,
         a military tactician second to none
         but as masters tend to do
         I became secure in my abilities
         I neglected the foundation of my stronghold.
When built correctly, a foundation is incredibly firm
         but even the strongest take only so much abuse,
         even the best can become cracked
         can fall into disrepair.
As I looked out upon the surrounding countryside,
         the fields laden with siege weapons and soldiers
         I stood assured that those walls,
         those Godforsaken, monolithic walls,
         could withstand the onslaught.
Now I stand over a demolished wreck,
         a heap of stone that was once a fortress.
I see clearly the destruction of my barriers
         and I see anew the foundation,
         the strength on which I stood
         the cracked and broken, worn and abused
         base of my former power.

Do you know what you are?
         I do

You are the foundation on which my fortress is built.
It is on your strength that I rely.
I treated you as the lowest division of my building,
         the groundwork upon which I rested.
Taking you for granted, I rejoiced in my own strength,
         but collapsed when the army attacked.
May God forgive the damage I’ve done,
         for I cannot forgive myself.
I destroyed my foundation. 

Welcome to the Rub’ al Khali,
         the world’s largest expanse of unbroken desert,
         a place we visited so many lifetimes ago.
There was an oasis at the beginning of time
         a beautiful wellspring of life
         green plants growing around crystal blue water,
         an abundance of merry creatures
         seeking respite from the harsh world around.
In the midst of this thriving microcosm,
         the most precious life to behold
         a stunning desert flower grew
         nourished and protected by the oasis.
Come now to the present end of time
         where the oasis is a barren wasteland of sand dunes
         devoid of most life and liquid,
         a tragic testament to lifetimes lost.
The desert flower is still there,
         but only as a remnant of its former glory
         beaten and battered by the harsh elements,
         no longer protected by the oasis
         no longer nurtured by abundant resources.
Where is the beautiful oasis now?

Do you know what you are?
         I do.

You are the abundant life at the beginning of time.
Flourishing you provide the beauty in me,
         the remarkable splendor of the oasis.
Your love is the resplendent desert flower,
         against which nothing more lovely can be found.
As the dying oasis,
         I have exposed you to the harsh elements,
         I have failed to protect the life in me,
                   failed to nourish your love.
May God forgive the damage I’ve done,
         for I cannot forgive myself.
I have allowed precious life to die.

If only I could ask
         to patch and reinforce the foundation,
         to maintain it.
And with your love and aid
         to rebuild a stronger fortress,
         no longer monolithic,
         but incorporating stones of your love throughout,
         not just in the foundation.

If only I could ask
         to terraform the oasis
         to shelter the life within from the elements
         to nourish the desert flower
And replete with life and love,
         could become whole again.

Do you know what you are?
         I do.