OBLIVIOUS TO RADAR

OBLIVIOUS TO RADAR

         The sensation was subtle, like crossing the equator at night in a ship. Jim and Julie signed the Agreement, the Judge executed the Final Decree and hammered down the gavel; and it was over just like that.

         After walking separately for several years, Julie had finally succumbed to the obvious.

         Even their dating was sporadic. Jim eventually started staying over, yet never completely moved in. Something was missing --- like a lost valuable --- Julie couldn’t put her finger on it.

         After a few years, Jim moved in but didn’t let go of his apartment. Julie asked, “What are you holding onto?”

         When he turned loose of the apartment, it was Julie's turn to be nervous. Do I really want him here?

         After a bit of hesitation and wavering on both sides, Jim and Julie married. For Julie, this solidified the relationship, yet the mention of changing her name, alarmed Jim.

         “Don’t do it.”

         “But... why not?” asked Julie.

         “If you take my name, I’ll be responsible for you.”

         Julie wondered… His reaction was foreign. If a man marries a woman, doesn’t he want her to be his? She let it go and kept her name --- the surname of her former husband. They were married, sharing time and space, but living in shadows. Reality was an illusion.

         Several months passed, and Jim began taking walks downtown alone. He was gone for hours and happy when he returned. He was cheating. Jim tried to convince Julie it was her fault. No apology and no remorse. As time passed, the strain on their relationship became harder to ignore.

         Then another girl called and left a message. Jim had called, and she was returning his call. She was giddy on the recorder as she confided her plans for the evening. Julie came home to the message. Harsh words were exchanged, and Jim left for two days. No apology.

         On a Friday evening in November, they went for a walk. Jim began forging ahead. When Julie picked up her pace, he lagged behind. Was he playing mind games?

         Julie asked directly, “Are we walking together or what?”

         “You’re imagining things... again.”

Julie crossed the street and walked home. Jim arrived hours later. It wasn’t discussed --- like it never happened.

         They went dancing and Julie’s timing was off. She was too fast or too slow, Jim criticized. Exasperated and all frozen up, she left the dance floor. Contrariwise Jim danced with another lady, smilling with pleasure and without complaint.

         Whenever they watched television, Jim controlled the remote.

         The time came when Julie finally asked Jim to move. They set a date at the end of February. Living separately was better. Jim visited from time-to-time, but something was still missing for Julie --- too many things unsaid, too many broken promises.

         Julie shared her decision with Jim, and he agreed to stop calling. When the papers were drawn up, he paid his share of the filing fees.

         Enemy ships pass in the night oblivious to radar, like it never happened.