before the confession

No one spoke as Elijah took his seat. Confessions consisted of a combination between the Catholic confession booths and an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. No booth stood in the white room, nothing blocked the confessor from the listener. They all sat in a circle, sharing to each other and the supervisor their temptations and thoughts of sin. No one actually went through with the sin, that would have been against the code. But some came close. The meetings usually involved the same drivel but not today. Today, Elijah had something to confess.

"I welcome you, sons and daughters of God, during this holy day of vigilince to our Father in heaven. May we give praise." Omniel, the supervisor, chanted the same greeting every sunday.

Everyone chorused the response. "Hallelujah! Praise the Lord!"

Elijah repeated the phrase with everyone, but not in the same loud, joyous manner of the others. Soon he would be admitting last night's adventure. He felt a twinge of nerves and excitement twist together.

"Today, in the light of the Holy God, you have come forth in confession. May you open your soul before us. It is begun."

Before Elijah could consider opening his mouth to speak, someone on his left fell to the floor.

"In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. I confess my thoughts of sin. Two days ago, I desired to defile myself in a most foul fashion."

Resting back against the plastic seat, Elijah rolled his eyes. Sure he should be considerate and understanding but with Muriel the story remained the same each time. He always jumped the gun, fell to the floor, and wretched over his sin of desiring to masturbate. He never committed the sin and wouldn't talk about anything else. If only Muriel knew real sin, then maybe his confessions would have more weight.

Instead of letting Muriel continue the confession, Elijah found himself interrupting. "Have you ever masturbated before?"

It felt as if the air in the circle tried to escape as everyone gasped. No one interrupted when someone was confessing. Certainly not with a question like that.

Muriel gave Elijah a hurt glare before answering. "Of course not."

"Really?" He continued despite everyone's horrified stares. "You have never, ever masturbated? You lived to be 32. It's a little difficult for me to believe that in all those years you didn't do it at least once."

Now Muriel looked upset, almost on the verge of tears at the accusations. "I would never spill my seed, senselessly. How dare you accuse me of such."

"Both of you settle down." The supervisor finally chimed in.

"I'm sorry," Elijah said and almost meant. "But it seems that some have the same confession every single week. Could we maybe just assume they did the same thing as last week instead of hearing about it twenty times?"

"Elijah, you will now sit in silence until you are called upon. During your silence you will think about how you are not in a position to pass judgement upon others."

Crossing his arms, he didn't respond. No point to argue more now, he would get into enough trouble after his confession. Muriel continued his confession, but Elijah didn't pay attention to him or anyone else. His thoughts drifted to last night and Lucas.

"I thank you for your silence. I hope that you have adequately considered upon and sought forgiveness for you behavior towards your brother, Muriel."

Elijah felt a sharp pain in arm. He looked over at the source on his right. Sophia stared back and gave her head a shake in gesture towards the supervisor.

"Do you have anything you wish to confess?" The supervisor continued, not showing his awareness that Elijah hadn't been paying attention.